Just returning to this for a moment since I'm reading "Rules of the Game" and following the missions in it just as a general starting point (I'll probably disregard the MM, canned openers, etc. stuff since it is outdated and not how I want to be in the field..). It's only day one (which I've done before) and I'm reading Style's section on limiting beliefs (which goes back to Inner Game).
LIMITING BELIEF: If I approach a woman, she'll know I'm hitting on
her and think I'm lame.
REALITY: This is only partially true—women think this only when men
approach them badly. This includes men who make them uncomfortable, creep
them out, or seem to have an agenda. The biggest mistake a man can make
with a woman is hitting on her before she's attracted to him. And though this
describes the so-called technique of most men, its a mistake you'll avoid if you
follow your daily missions. Few women will resent meeting someone who is
warm, funny sincere. interesting, engaging, makes them feel comfortable, and
isn't going to stick around talking their ear off.
Disregard this? Assume attraction when you go in. Visualize in your mind arousal that involves this girl so everything you are communicating is engrossed in this frame and she will sense it too. You are warm, funny, sincere, interesting, engaging, you are high value, the best possible guy out there and you are giving her an invitation to enter your world. Where she can experience fun, pleasure and break out of the mundane. So don't worry about "getting attraction before hitting on the girl", assume attraction, get in the right frame, communicate that through body-language, subtext and even your words?
What would make you think women don't want to be hit on? Would you want a hot loving, fun girl to approach you while you're walking down your street and ask for your number so she could buy you dinner and entertain you tonight? Now would you want a woman who is very much unattractive (physically for women, poor approaches and low confidence for men) to approach you and do this? Probably not. Women know you're hitting on them whether your approach is bad or good. They run on intuition. But who doesn't want to be swept off their feet today? Who doesn't want the beginning of their romantic story and future family to start today? Who doesn't want mind blowing sex with someone that makes them feel sexy and comfortable today? On what planet would any sane human being be opposed to such a thing?
The reality is everyone wants to be seduced by someone who knows how to seduce them. No one wants to work five days a week for 40 hours without any excitement in their life. Be the reason that someone has meaning. Give a chick another reason to live. You have to believe in your value. Your approach could be the beginning of the rest of someones life. Seriously. Women are waiting on you. They're depending on you developing the skills to bring more joy and fulfillment into their reality.
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