Here's my dilemma. I am in a relationship, and she's got quite a few things going for her. She's got a good job, she's smarter than the girl next door, she's not hot but she's cute, and she's really loving and caring, almost unconditionally so. But ever since I found out about the game and the community a few months ago, I've become obsessed with it. So obviously I'm not totally happy in this relationship. However, I've heard DJ Fuji talk about how very few people actually get good at the game. And I've got very little game, since I'm a total newbie. Hence my question: what should I do? Settle for a relationship that I'm not entirely satisfied with but that brings me support and value, or try and get the skills to be able to attract girls that have more value than my current GF - at the risk of losing her and attaining only a mediocre level at the game. I'm sure some of you guys have had the same problem, being in a relationship but wanting more. A penny for your thoughts...

Gaming to me takes on many different faces, but one aspect of it is simply understanding women. If you really aren't happy with your relationship, leave. But it sounds to me like you've got a good thing going, just want to taste what it's like to be "that guy" in the movies. Game can help your relationship, too. The two are not mutually exclusive. Try reading some of the posts in the Relationship section.

1. You'll see how bad some other guys have it, and you'll appreciate your girl more.

2. You can pick up tips on how to keep the relationship exciting for both of you.

Good luck in whatever you decide.

I'm in a similar situation. I have been in the game a couple of years. I know I am capable of much more but I'm liking what I've got...just not enough to be totally happy. The approach I'm taking with it is that I'm going to have both until the decision works itself out. I won't lie to her and tell her that I'm 100% faithful. I told her that I'm not completely ready for a relationship because I've been in a committed relationship for a long time and it just ended up burning me. I told her that I love her company and what we have but I'm not done exploring who I am. If she wants to stop having sex, we can do that but I need to know myself better before I can commit to being the person she needs me to be. However, when I do commit, she can be sure it'll be 150,000%. She was mad at first but she respected my honesty. We still have all the benefits of the relationship but not all of the commitment issues. However, I am finding that the more I am away from her, the more I'd just rather be with her. Not a lot of women out there who don't have a lot of baggage and hangups.

- R

There are soooo many reasons never to settle for an unsatisfactory relationship. The other person does not have to be a bad person or to do anything terrible in order for a relationship to be unfullfilling and dissatifying.

If you settle you will always wonder, "what if?"

You will never apply youself completely and so the person you settle for will never truly be satisfied either.

You are off the martket and so you aren't able to meet someone that you would fit better with or even worse yet, if that person comes along you won't be able to do anything about it.

But here is what I really want you to think about. If you do not develop your social skills and do not develop the traits that women find attractive and desirable, you put all your eggs in one basket with someone you are not satisfied with so when the day comes that she dumps you, then you are up a creek without a paddle and this is where guys get desparate and develop oneitis so bad.

As a young man it is important for you to be able to know how to approach, engage and attract women that are a good match for you. If you do not develop those traits and skills then you will always have to settle for whatever you can scrounge up like fat chicks and nasty skanky chicks and unattractive and undesirable ones that noone else wants.

People seek and end up with their own level. If you are a high quality person with good traits and skills then you can attract women with good traits and skills. If you do not have those traits/skills then the women you will be stuck with won't have them either.

Dude, I think you'll like this

If you want to get good, try it out, when you are out with your guy friends, but don't go as far as cheating on your girlfriend, once you get good enough, to be able to know when, you'll get a kiss close end it there, and eject from the set

Then pick, one of your friends, who is a total AFC, tell him about the community, and teach him some stuff you know, and train him to become a PUA

The part about you breaking up with your girlfriend, is your own choice, the most important thing is, do what YOU want, and what you think will be best for YOU

Hope this helps,

Peace,

Troyden

hey dude, i can see your problem... but this whole thing is about you and other people having great experiences together and having fun. if your settling for a relationship then your not happy!!! my advice would be deal with the gf but as nice as possible and for fuck sake don't tell her the reason why hahahaha. also i am new to this sort of thing. so any responses for my future and hopefully constant post would be greatly appretiated. also dude.... you gotta be spontaneous!!!



- Artless.

Excellent advice.

Also Toyden makes a good point, you can get some benefits of both worlds working on early game while out with buddies. Flirting is not a crime, though some manipulative insecure bitches will try to make you believe it is.

Also, you can be just as affective saying flat out "oh yeah" to being asked if you have a girlfriend than if you lie like a rug pretending you don't. Honesty has an endering quality and attraction does not STOP just because you are unavailable.

Just be careful once you get more comfortable not to let your ego and your balls think for you. Flirting, building value and becoming interesting to women will make you a better more appreciated boyfriend, but crossing lines and cheating will make you an unwanted dog.

If however once you do become more comfortable you look at your girl and say "damn I can do betteR" and its not arrogance talking, then jsut be honest and say that you would like to take some time appart. We're all amazed what we have after we let it go, good or bad.

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"Would it be wrong to join sexaholics anonymous to pick-up chicks?" "...yes, and stop eating that baby."

-Psych3r-

Agreed.

Honestly bro, I've been in the exact same situation. Once you get a taste of what is potentially possible, and the amount of success you could potentially have with the game, it makes what you've already GOT look a whole less glamorous. I've been there and I know how hard it can be to resist going out to become a player.

My advice is this, and I say this because I wish someone would have given me this advice when I was in your situation: Stay with your girl. Treat her like a gold, make her feel acknowledged and appreciated, put your attention on making her feel GOOD, and your mind will start to settle down about becoming a PUA.

Who knows if you will be with this girl forever, but in my experiences, girls like your current girlfriend- solid women who are REAL partner material- don't grow on trees. And if you have a relationship with one right now you should make the most of it. If it doesn't work out, or if in 2 months you still feel unhappy with her, leave.

But my advice is to make it into a game and say "OK for the next two months I'm gonna commit to my relationship" and see where that takes you. After that two months, you can go for another two, or try something new.

Hit me up if you have any questions about any of that. Good luck bro!

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If you are ready to face your fears and FINALLY fulfill your full potential in seducing HOT women, ask me about my VIP Intensive.

Get better at the game!

My same dilemma. In my case, while I have a gf (who's not old enough to go out and lives with her parents), I'll go out and work on my own game.

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