Well hello there,

I'm a 19 year old White male living in a 3rd world central american country in a party/surf town. I am 165lbs 6'0 athletic and muscular, blue eyes brown short hair. I am about to move away from home to an apartment with an older guy (friend/mentor/possible business partner).

My whole life I've been taught in either home school or private schools and graduated with a 91% average.

I've been involved in sports teams and I actively surf.

I have had 2 serious girlfriends since i was 16 and have had sex with 4 girls total. I have been in a threesome with my last girlfriend and her friend.

The last girl I dated was 3 years younger than me and we were together for 2 years.. She was a 10 for sure, absolutely stunning, and she lost her virginity to me. We had a great relationship for a month and then I left to boarding school. Upon coming back i dealt with issue after issue from her and involving other guys. She's always been in love with me and we've always had a huge connection.. but I kind of got shafted a few times. We have been on and off for 2 years for months at a time.. and it now seems to have come to an end. I broke up with her after finding out she was into someone else and just with me till he got back from the states.

I'm not wealthy, and am going through the Journey of growing up.. I have pretty low self esteem and confidence for an unknown reason. I have considered EMDR and other forms of therapy but never gone through any. I have very little reason to not be confident and in fact I have heard (from the mother of my ex) That the only problem with me is that I have no confidence and if I did my ex and every other girl in town would be all over me.

As a kid I was always shy.. I got bullied and picked on alot before 8th grade and then went through puberty and became more of the man I am now..

I am (according to the girls I've been with) exceptional in bed.. everytime me and my ex had sex she'd have 1-5 orgasms. I don't really have enough experience to know if that was just her or if I'm really that good.

Everyone who knows me tells me how good of a person I am and can see and feel my energy as an exceptional person. All my friends love spending time with me and comment on it regularly. I have been reading PUA stuff since 09. I feel like I just have very little to say and feel pretty unvalidated as a person. I have never really worked or tried my hardest in anything.. I spent a lot of time gaming in the last 2 years and not enough time doing constructive things.

I am really hoping to find a way to increase my confidence and inner game.. I have always lacked it for no apparent reason (my dad has little confidence but is also an exceptional/once famous person who is very good hearted and has tried his best as a father and as a husband).

I wish everyone luck with their endeavours in the PUA community and I hope to be progressing soon!

Thanks for your time,

Somnium

Heard that about wasting too much time playing Video games! God damn, if I could transfer all my hand eye coordination to listening and paying attention to IOI's of and body language I'd be a born natural.

I know man, seriously...
But I'm ready to give it all up.
I've been doing some reading and it seems to me that the first step toward confidence is setting goals for yourself and striving to achieve them.. Which is what I will begin today..

Is there anywhere I can find out what all the lingo means? like lOl and hb10 and stuff?
Thanks bros