Hey Guys,

This is Lysander.

I'm 27 and only just picking up the Game.

Here's a brief history:

For the last 5 years (since a particularly shit breakup) I have been completely unable to close with a girl if I am attracted to her. I have barely been able to even TOUCH them. Somehow I managed to get numbers and dates with fairly attractive women, make them laugh and have pleasant conversation but after the first or second date things would get weird and she'd start bailing out.

My failures became legend amongst my friends and they told my story at parties- tales of The Unluckiest Guy Ever, who consistently met and dated 7's or 8's but NEVER got laid, no matter how much of a sealed deal it appeared from the outside.

This consistent repetition tells me something: I have enough of the external 'ingredients' to be attractive to women, so my main problem is internal.

Fast-forward to recent events.

I went out one night and met a girl I thought was PERFECT. Got the balls to dance with her, made her laugh kinda accidentally but got a number. I could tell she was interested. I realised that I had two options: Do what I always did (fuck it up) or do something different. I decided to come up with a strategy. I didn't know any PUA's or theory at this point so I came up with this:

The Strategy

PERSISTENCE: Don't give up straight away, even if she flakes or seems uninterested. Try again. And again.
She flaked a LOT. She'd cancel a date, reschedule then cancel again. Once she turned up half an hour late and then said "You should probably get used to me being late, cause I'm late everywhere". Normally I'd give up, this time I persisted (or took it like a bitch if you prefer. I now see that these were tests).

FUN: Stop being so 'polite'. Polite= boring. Start being fun.
I started being Cocky/Funny but at that stage I'd never heard the term before. I took her to a big art gallery where the field was totally stacked in my favour because I'd majored in Fine Art in university. I'd ask her opinion on paintings, then shoot her down in funny ways. E.g. when she said she hated 'thick, chunky paintings' I would just stare at her blankly until she went "oh...shit... that's not how you paint is it??" at which point I'd crack and just laugh at her. That stuff WORKED. I also pointed to paintings by teachers I'd studied with and I'd say "I studied under that guy... he's shit" and I'd tell her a funny story about their inadequacies.
Before the end of the date we were lying in the park nearby making out.

DIRECT: Tell her what you think. Have an opinion, even if it disagrees with hers or makes you seem vulnerable. Don't bottle everything up.
If I thought she was saying something stupid, I'd tease her about it. But if she did something I liked, I'd tell her. I worked out that compliments do not 'create attraction' unless they are used as a foil. Tease her, give her hell, even act bored. THEN give her a compliment. "Sorry, I wasn't listening. I can't concentrate on a thing you say when you smile like that". Then she smiles and you point out her dimples or something and go from there. But you can't overdo it. Compliments are a special treat, not a staple diet. I got the balance wrong and started complimenting her too much (trying to be 'direct') and, when she got distant I even tried the "I like you" card to rekindle interest. Has that EVER worked?! It didn't in this case.


In the end, the experiment still ended with "Lets Just Be Friends". It had many faults built into it. One of the big ones is the 'one-itis' that underpins the whole thing.

But in the process I learned something: At some point in the few months I was seeing her something CHANGED. Her attraction to me switched and I can almost pinpoint when that happened. Which means I can learn from that.

In the process of the experiment I stumbled on David Deangelo. Once the experiment ended I realised I'd learn faster with help. I picked up Double Your Dating and a pocket size book of NLP basics, which have changed the entire way I carry myself and visualise myself. The effects of addressing my inner game have been immediately obvious.

I just picked up The Game by Strauss after watching some YouTube clips. Now I'm in here to get any advice from whoever I can.

Soon there will be new stories about me going around at parties, but they'll be legends of success.

L

Right on. That's a great story, you must not have been a regular AFC because you actually tryed a different tactic that were used to, so cheers. Also next time try to throw in more kino, and remember that kissing on a date or first meet is only building comfort between the two of you, not attraction.

And examples of kino are, poking her, pushing, hugging, punching, holding hands.

Hope that helps you out a little.

_________________
{Boba Fett AFC}[[[[[[[[[[[[{Han Solo PUA}
Leia:I love you.[[[[[[[[[[[[[[Leia: I love you.
Boba:I love you too.[[[[[[[[Han: I know.

Thanks Vallon,

Appreciated man.

I forgot to mention kino. Before the experiment I'd always been awkward with touch. I could actually *feel* a force field of awkwardness around me that could not be physically penetrated.

But in the context of the 'experiment' it was easy because I knew I had nothing really to lose and knowledge to gain.

The first time I made out with her (before the art gallery) I hadn't seen her in a month. Her first words to me were 'you need a shave', which I did. Over the course of the night I acted confident, cocky & funny and initiated mild kino- I'd let my leg rest against hers as I talked to her and improvised a move I'd NEVER tried before- when her friends got up for the bathroom I told her I wanted to check something. I took her chin in my hand and looked into her eyes like I was looking for something. After half a minute I was like "Ok, cool". She was like "what??" and I brushed it off and changed the subject. Before long she was all over me and we got kicked out of the club! (Didn't F-Close though, true to form).

But I went to the opposite extreme later on in things- I got in the habit of always putting my arm around her when we walked down the street... kino loses its tension that way and becomes clinginess.

Anyway, I got a lot to learn. I'm already building better strategies that encompass every area of my life that I can think of, with my Game being only one of the strings in my bow.