Hey my name is Peter. I've been reading the pick up books, techniques and such for awhile but never tried it. I haven't had a girlfriend in 12 years and only 1 date in that I'm. I'm turning 32 in about 2 weeks. I go to the gym, travel alot and even play in a band, and I cannot get over my shyness and awkwardness with talking to girls and after an embarrassing incident just recently, I desperately need help, tough love, and anything else to get over this! Thanks!

Hello my Friend.

Im stankwagon from Columbus ohio. Shyness is a product of fear. Fear must be destroyed. I suggest concentrating your efforts on annexing fear first...read some books, change your mental point of view and eventually try to over come it. That seems to me to be the obvious problem you're having. If i were to tell you how i'd go about releasing my fears, i would do so like this.

1) fear is something you feel VERY often. every time you go to do something, or say something, and then change your mind. STOP THAT. what i do is...the MOMENT a thought pops into my head ...i do it, or say it. PERIOD.

2) Everytime you order food or talk to a stranger, or a friend, or make a phone call, push yourself to talk about things you normally wouldnt, or say things differently then you normally would. Dont worry about pissing people off, just say whats on your mind. Say hi to everyone. look them in the eye, smile. Do this to EVERYONE you see....wave at them, tip your hat make gestures, make comments about nails earrings shoes shirts tight pants. Then slowly, push yourself further..dont just say " hey i like your shoes" say " hey i like your shoes, and by the way its lovely weather".

3) Have you ever jerked off when you were a child in the bathtub, cleaned up and then right before you open the door to leave you think " oh god, what if they knew what i was doing in there?" I mean, you were just young and dumb....YOU knew what you were doing, therefor you think its obvious that they know what you were doing too... I think we guys do this when we go to approach a woman. We just assume that they know everything about us that we know. they dont....when you 70 you will realize that..tho its hard to now, stop worrying what people think about you....buy yourself a pare of pink pants and wear those bitches everywhere and tell yourself, FUCK THEM IF THEY DONT LIKE IT..

4) The most pathetic thing we do as human beings is fear what others think of us. STOP IT. no matter what you do, or how sexy you become or how beautiful you are, people will still hate you and be unattracted to you. So you might as well just start talking!