Hey everyone!

My name is Smiley, I'm 20, and I am very new to the pickup game. Just recently started reading "The Game" by Style and thought it would be a good idea to become a part of one of these communities. I have two major sticking points and welcome any advice/criticism. 1) I have to work on my self confidence. The weird thing is that I am actually an MMA fighter and I get punched in the face on a daily basis. I am fine with that but when it comes to approaching and talking to a girl, I'm a bitch. 2) I'm not very good at holding a conversation with a girl. I am decent at coming up with an opener (sometimes) but then I start to get lost and it all gets awkward.

Anyway, that's me. Again, any advice/criticism is welcome. I'm a pretty easy going guy so I'm easy to get along with...I think....

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Smiley

Want to follow each other on Twitter and keep each other updated on progress in the game of pickup? http://twitter.com/_Smiley_X_ just send me a direct message telling me your PUA name. Let's help each other out!

A common thing for people who are new in the community is they say they want more "confidence" and I will tell you this. Confidence is not a thing that you do or don't have. It is a state of mind. Confidence comes through competence and understanding of your challenge. People say they want more "confidence" when talking to women but the real problem is they just don't know what they are doing!

I'll use this analogy for you... You're and MMA fighter. You know if you have someone who is smaller and weaker than you and you have seen them fight and know how to counter each one of your opponents maneuvers, you will feel confident in your ability to beat that opponent. Right? So you already know what it feels like to BE confident. You simply must realize that you can make yourself FEEL confident at any time you would like, as long as you know what that feeling really means to you.

Personally, for example, I am very confident in my ability to drive a car. I street race. I know how to take turns going extremely fast, bang through the gears and get out of sticky situations (police tend to not agree with my confidence levels sometimes lol) but that is because I have knowledge and a healthy fear of what my car is capable of doing. My confidence comes from inside. For me, it is a feeling of almost a bolt of energy that shoots up my back. Figure out what "confidence" means to you and learn how to make yourself always feel that way.

And another thing... why would you be afraid of a girl? C'mon lol you practice mixed martial arts and get clocked in the face and you are gonna puss out when it comes to talking to some 120 pound female who's upper arms are probably the size of your wrist and can barely hold up her cell phone without getting fatigued? What could she possibly do to you? The key to becoming a successful PUA is learning how to not necessarily let go of your emotions... but learn how to control them. (FYI, learning to maintain your emotions will help you alot with your fights too)

Hope this helps bro

TheMajikalMethod,

Thanks for your reply! I know it sounds crazy that girls intimidate me so much when I get physically damaged on almost a daily basis. I tell myself this all the time lol it just doesn't make sense. I really like how you describe confidence and being simply a matter of knowing what you're doing. Thinking about it, I totally agree with you. I think a good way for me to get started here is to try keeping those emotions in check like you mentioned. I know that the feeling of nervousness that I feel right before approaching a girl will probably never go away, but I can change how I handle those feelings. I think I'll try redirecting the nerves in a way to give myself motivation to overcome them instead of letting them dictate my actions. I'll start here and see how it goes. Thank you very much for the advice, it's greatly appreciated! I look forward to chatting with you more sometime!

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Smiley

Want to follow each other on Twitter and keep each other updated on progress in the game of pickup? http://twitter.com/_Smiley_X_ just send me a direct message telling me your PUA name. Let's help each other out!

Hey I am a young guy too, we just got to put ourselves out there! Easier said then done.

Nice to meet you, Finesse. Much easier said than done lol. It'll get easier, though, with practice. There's a quote my father told me a while back: "Ain't nothin' to it but to do it!" So lets get out there and do it!

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Smiley

Want to follow each other on Twitter and keep each other updated on progress in the game of pickup? http://twitter.com/_Smiley_X_ just send me a direct message telling me your PUA name. Let's help each other out!

Sounds good, I look forward to watching it. Good luck tonight, man, let me know how it goes!


[quote="Finesse722"][quote="Smiley X"]Nice to meet you, Finesse. Much easier said than done lol. It'll get easier, though, with practice. There's a quote my father told me a while back: "Ain't nothin' to it but to do it!" So lets get out there and do it!

Found a good video to start us off. ill message it to you. I am going to practice tonite.

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Smiley

Want to follow each other on Twitter and keep each other updated on progress in the game of pickup? http://twitter.com/_Smiley_X_ just send me a direct message telling me your PUA name. Let's help each other out!