hi all my wife left me and the kids 3 months ago and have been at an all time low. I started thai boxing 2 month ago which has helped out with my confidence as it was down and i even approched a girl who ive thought was hot for the last couple of years. Anyway we've been talking on facebook for a week and i told her i was in her street one day next week (she already told me where she lived) and she replied with send me your num and call in for a drink and chat, i went her house and everything seemed like it went well and we walked down school together to fetch the kids and went our seperate ways with her saying message me tonight.that night came messaged her and she was saying that we have alot in common and complimented me on how tall i was and that i have a good nature,great with kids and that i was one in amillion to look after 2 kids on my own as many farthers wouldnt.since then she hasnt messaged as much and i think im losing her interest , i did bump in to her at the shop and she she seemed happy to see me and said that i was looking good and do i work out we had good eye contact an dwe stood pretty close together are these good signs? i just feel abit lost being out the game for 9 years,she has only spilt from her ex 2 month ago and it was a bad relationship for her so she has already said she wants to find her self again before dating again.im the one who always starts the convo on fb and she always replys i went on a short break with the kids and she messaged me calling me a lil wreckhead n have a good time,see ya soon x, she called me the wreck head as went out on the sat nite n she heard about it lol .now i aint replyed to her message and she sent it four days ago how would ya reply to it if at all?or do ya think she just wants my attention and i should just ignore her.any help would be great like i said ive been a little shook up but trying to find my feet again.

Yes, reply at will A good rule of thumb for text is 1 to 1

And read this:

7-texting-mistakes-stolen-from-a-pro-vt ... highlight=

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They call me the cat whisperer, cause I know exactly what the pussy needs.

Shady, asking about you working out, etc... were all IOIs. She was pre-selecting in her mind.

Don't worry about FB, call her. Set up a time to have 1-on-1 drinks before you pick up the kids again. Give yourself about 2 hours - then escalate and see where it leads.

Best,

RR

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Women are like ceramic tile.... if you do the prep work, and lay them properly the first time...you can walk all over them for years to come.

how would you reply to her last message i just dont wanna come off as needy and i know her ex is still ringing her everyday but she says that is def over.how would you play it?

Of course RR is right here
Don't worry about the reply...call and set up something all brand new!

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They call me the cat whisperer, cause I know exactly what the pussy needs.

To add to Heywood...

Why are you mentioning her Ex? He doesn't matter. If you act like he does matter - You will fuck up your own game.

You control set, you cannot control what he does.

So, to not appear as needy - is to NOT BE NEEDY. If I want to fuck a chick, it's because I'm in to her, and it's a mutually benefical thing. She WANTS to be fucked by me. If I call her to set up a time to meet, she doesn't see me as needy, she sees herself being jackhammered, repeatedly. That's the frame I set.

Seriously, don't worry about it, or overthink it. If the IOIs are there, take care of business and make her afternoon memorable.


RR

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Women are like ceramic tile.... if you do the prep work, and lay them properly the first time...you can walk all over them for years to come.

Hi shadybuisness!

First thing I suggest you is to read the book "No more mr. nice guy":

http://www.amazon.com/No-More-Mr-Nice-G ... r+nice+guy

After you read this book, you will understand a lot of things about how a lot of men act needy, desperate ...

Good luck on your journey!

i would call her but i never got her num she had mine then i replyed in the same message the time i would call hers so only message on fb,we do see each most days at the kids school.i compared her to a chav on one of my messages now she wants me to explain...do i just make light of it as she aint a chav was just funny at the time.i only mentioned the ex as i got the feelin she aint over him.i read the link on txtin and corrected alot of my errors lol.her last message was :chav? explain haha xx. is it best to just make light of it or cary on makin fun of her?

I have no idea what a chav is.....

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Women are like ceramic tile.... if you do the prep work, and lay them properly the first time...you can walk all over them for years to come.

lol a chav is a tracksuit wearing youth lol with all there gold on n baseball cap slightly to the side,anyway she thought it was funny and we are goin out with her kids to the beach during the hols,(soon as we get the weather)is that a good thing to do and what sort of things will i need to do to escalate with her as she will have her kids with us,is it just best to play it cool? after reading the text link and improving my texts she has been opening up alot more and tellin me more personal things about her so thanks for the help : ).she didi say early on that she didnt want a bf just yet that she was havin fun with her kids but going to the beach and opening up more are these good things or do think she just being friendly?she says she s creative and loves writing poems (which she thinks is cheesy)i aske dher write me one is that ok to? thanks for ya help every1

Inviting you to be around her children is one of the strongest IOIs you can ever get.

BUT - you're dealing with a single mom, as well. You can't initiate any escalation that day. You need to focus on the kids. When she sees you interact well with her children, that DHV's you in a HUGE way. It will build her attraction.

Go in to the date resigned NOT to escalate physically. Use the date to escalate mentally to the point the NEXT date will be one you can become more intimate-much faster.

As for the BF talk - IGNORE IT. Deflect it and simply say "I don't want to worry about titles and terms and girlfriend/boyfriend talk. I want to just know it. I want to just feel it. If it's right, we'll know." All bullshit, nothing hardfast...but she understands that you're also NOT seeking a relationship, but you are open to it "if the right girls comes along...". You start making her picture herself as the 'right girl'...

In the future, ask her to share a poem, but not write one for you. That makes her efforts appear as work, rather than fun/caring. IF she writes you a poem one day, THEN it's much more memorable (regardless if it reads like shit...) - it will have been a freely thought-out gift.

Best,


RR

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Women are like ceramic tile.... if you do the prep work, and lay them properly the first time...you can walk all over them for years to come.

thanks that make salot of sense and since that last message she didnt reply but yesterday was my b-day and she posted on my wall happy birtrhday blondie xx which is her nickname for me.now would you leave the messaes for abit and let her mesage first and we wont be goin the beach for a few weeks yet ive got some work do on me car and my kids look after to.just wondered how you would play the next few weeks as we wont b seeing each other at school as its the hols now and would you wait for her to message first?thanks again

Tough call.

I don't game a chick then ice it for several weeks. My game is much more direct & immediate....so keep that in mind... but from what I read:

Ask yourself a few questions... is she a FB-monkey? Is she the type to comment on everything/anything someone writes? Is she there 3-4 hours a day discussing something that took only 20 minutes in her life to happen? Does she stalk others on FB? Is she prone to texting moreso than leaving a message on FB? What's her routine, and how did it vary to contact you on your B-day? There are hidden clues in the answers...

But, I'd not contact her right now. Let her miss you a little... If she's in to you - she WILL miss you. After 2-3 days and no contact, throw out a random, and guage interest. I think you'll have a much better idea then.

Best,


RR

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Women are like ceramic tile.... if you do the prep work, and lay them properly the first time...you can walk all over them for years to come.

no shes not always on fb and doesnt really talk on peoples walls that much.whenever we chat its always in pm and i never got her num she had mine n i replyed when i was goin her sso never really ysed phones we just chat in person n on fb.tuesday was last message then yesterday she wished me happy b-day,so would you leave it for the weekend lik sunday night?im gonna be busy tonight and most of tomorrow anyways.i never used be like this then since spilt with my ex just been lost n abit down with doubting myself.thanks again

Can you get her number and start a conversation with her over the phone?

I'm not a FB guy, I can't stand it - it runs counter-productive to my game... I go for phone/F2F as quickly as possible.

It seems like she's in to you...


RR

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Women are like ceramic tile.... if you do the prep work, and lay them properly the first time...you can walk all over them for years to come.