Hi Nathan,
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i spent so long trying to be one of those "i like dancing and clubbing and party type guys." but i just never enjoy it.
Don't pretend like you're something you're not. If you don't enjoy it, why do it?
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i also want to hear others opinions on whether all girls want out-there alpha type males or if its just mainstream girls or clubbin type girls.
Everyone has different archetypes that they're attracted to. Some like fat guys, some like skinny guys, some like the typical Muscular guys. Alpha is thrown around so much and means different things, but if by Alpha you mean: A guy having a backbone, not doing things he doesn't like just because someone asked him to and not being afraid to stand up for what he believes in.
Then yes, all woman are attracted to this guy. He's sexy.
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do we all have to be these extreme party animals in order to get attractive girls?
Nope, you can be the strong, sexy and silent archetype. If that's trueer to your personality. Again, don't pretend like you're something you're not.
You also don't have to go clubbing to meet girls if you don't like it. Attractive woman walk the streets every day, they're in supermarkets, bookstores, etc. Who says you can't talk to woman outside of clubs?
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and what is attractive anyway? isnt that pretty much a "beauty is in the eye of the beholder" situation? i mean yeah i like very skinny punk\alternative\grungy\goth girls. although i can see a mainstream girl with a nice body and want to have sex with her, id never really bother because she wouldnt get me, and i usually find mainstream girls uninteresting. then again alternative type girls are usually crazy. i guess what im asking here is, is it ok to have a specific type that you find physically attractive and focus on that?
If that's what you want, why go for something else? Society is always trying to tell you what is "attractive", giving you the standards for the ideal woman. But yes, beauty is in the eye of the beholder, go for what YOU want.
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i mean i feel like i dont want to have a relationship with someone unless they are really skinny and alternative. but i hear so often that focussing on the physical is shallow and not the right way to find love. but i cant help it, its like the girl has to pass the skinny and good aesthetic taste test before i can even care about their personality. is that normal?
Congratulations.... you're a human being!
Yes, it's normal. Men are visual creatures. What they mean with shallow is if you ONLY care about her looks. Like if she's hot, but has a horrible personality, kills puppies, etc, and you stick with her, just because she's hot. That's shallow.
It's fine to have a filter about attractive girls.