Hey everyone,

I'm new to the PUA lifestyle. I've been doing a lot of research and reading some books.
I read some posts on here and I like the tips that are being given to help.

So back to the topic...

I was with my ex about a year in a serious relationship. About 8 months In we started going on and off with the relationship. Just recently in September my ex and I ended everything, got closure on everything and all that.
I see her on a very regular basis because of church and because I'm really good friends with her bother, and her sister is dating my cousin (my closest cousin).
After the breakup I would barely talk to her (just saying hi and bye) to be respectful and not like a jerk. Texting and some phone calls now and then started to happen more frequently between us.
But recently I went back home to Chicago to visit family and old friends. A few days after I was out there I get a text around 2:30am of her saying "Hope you're enjoying that cold weather while pure in the cold ;b" we texted for most of that night/morning whatever you want to call it and I stopped texting her. A day after that conversation she texts me and asks me what I'm doing, I reply and she says she needs to tell me something. She send me a long text saying that she's sorry for how the breakup went and how she acted through it. She had also mentioned that "we were too close then to be strangers now". I forgive her and tell her that I've moved passed all that. And the conversation pretty much ended a few texts after that.

NOTE: I don't start any conversations with her she starts them.

So as my trip is going on I'm going on dates and I'm still meeting women in Chicago and in Florida (where I moved to for school) and she'd text me during the trip and telling me to tell my mom that he wishes her a happy birthday and all that.

I get back and of course throughout the whole time we haven't been together I decided to pick myself up from that hard breakup and the loss of a girl that I actually fell for and upgrade my whole lifestyle. So I start to dress a lot nicer, go out more, meet more females, go on casual dates and all that. Everytime for church I get all dressed up or any other time I do she's always complimenting me on how I look saying "you look so good" and other compliments of that sort. I seen her for church on a Wednesday night, and we kept it like usual with barely any words being said just Hi/Bye. She sends me a text about an hour later saying "you looked so good on Sunday, your outfit was amazing. I forgot to tell you". I know she didn't forget caus she told me the day I wore that lol. I tell her thank you and we talked for a few hours through text. That conversation also consisted of her asking me if a girl was "helping" me pick my clothes out and trying to find out if there's a girl I'm talking to. I dodge the question and tell her "you'll just have to wait and see if I keep it consistent ;b" joking of course.
This recent Sunday I also dressed up really good and she tells me that "You're definitely getting help" I joke with her and she tells me "You look really good though". Later that day I posted a picture on Instagram and she comments on it saying "Super Cute".

Also, did I mention that her sister wanted to hang out with me "randomly" that day as well.

Then there was today. I play basketball regularly and her brother and I had gone to play basketball. Afterwards we decided to go out to eat. He calls me as we're driving in separate cars and says "meet me there I'm going to pick up my sister". Me confused, I just shrugged my shoulders and met him there. As I was there eating me, her brother, her and our friend were all eating and she's making conversation and sits across from me she puts her feet up on the chair I'm sitting on resting her legs next to mine. I paid no attention because I didn't mind. During that whole process her brother wanted to go to a hookah bar with all of us and we all decided to go. She had to go pick something up from her friends house and we both drove there. She's sitting pretty close and not caring if she's close to me or if our arms our touching and she's leaning towards me to change the radio. I go home to take a shower while I take her to her house so I can go and change. We all met at the hookah bar and were hanging out. It was normal and chill the whole time and then she asks me to sit next to her because I was saying that the A/C was blowing all my smoke away. We're sitting really close together and eventually she starts to lay on my leg and my chest, asking me to play with her hair and other stuff. A little bit after she's laying down and she's playing with my hand and we were really close. I eventually held her hand after reading many of the IOI's she gave (playing with her hair, getting really close, and the obvious one when she started to lay on me)

before I get to the rest of the story I want to inform you all about her mentioning a couple days before about us and how we would send pictures of eachother to fit the conversation (corny, but I liked it).

Eventually I ended up holding her hand and she's gotten really close to me and we're basically cuddling in the hookah bar. During that her brother was winking at me like he knew this was going to happen or something and I think he was texting her about it as well so he didn't really bother us too much. It ended at that and we all left. Once I got home she texted me about her being able to blow rings out of the smoke and said she was tired. She then sends a kind of out of the blue text saying "wanna know what we should have done, what I wanted to do?" I asked what and she told me to guess. I sarcastically said "Hm.. Gone outside?" She sends me back "that's exactly what I was thinking, you're good. Smh lol" I told her to just say it and she tolde she didn't want to freak me out. I didn't text back and a few mins later she said "to be honest, I had the urge to make out" I acted as if I didn't know that she wanted to. I texted back after that saying "I guess we'll have to wait until the next opportunity comes around lol". She fell asleep because I took a little longer to reply so I might get a text back in the morning.

This might be a dumb question but does this mean she's starting to get feelings for me again?
And what should I do as this all continues?

Sorry for the lengthy post. Just getting the point across.

ANY help will be appreciated. Thanks!

Hey. I'm not a complete expert on the subject and I'm new to the forums myself, but I would say she is totally in to you again. As you said there were many IOIs there, but essentially her saying that she wanted to make out isn't just an IOI, it's a bright (whatever color) flag flapping in the wind. As you suspected it was obviously set up beforehand for you guys to hang out.

Again, I'm no expert...but I would imagine that there's some kind of difference with how to perceive IOIs with an ex, simply because you've been together before. For example if you randomly saw a girl you had hooked up with a week before back in the club, you wouldn't walk up and bother opening with her, you could skip ahead to later stages of kino (personally I would just walk up behind her and gently pull on her hair) if she was down for that before to accelerate the process. She knows she's attracted to you so why start from scratch?

If you are still attracted to her in the least bit I would say she gave you a glaringly obvious go ahead to be intimate, but I would tread carefully if you aren't looking to get back in to a relationship with her, she may get the wrong idea.

Thanks for your Input! It's hard finding someone that isn't involved with either me or my ex. To be honest, I was considering trying to get her back before all of this started happening. Next time we get some time to hang out (outside of church of course) I will skip ahead with some kino and see how she reacts to it. Even when I see her tonight for church I'll try some kino if a conversation between us strikes.

I do have options with women and do go out on dates. I want to know where should I go next in pursuing her again? I know she's my ex so I have to be careful with how I approach things with her, you know? I I just want some outside wisdom on the situation on where to go next.

Thanks again!