Hey guys, I'm James, or wtf, or The Fur Baron, all work for me.
I live in the Portland Oregon are though not actually in the city sadly.
I'm 19.
I got into the game around last August, when I started hard core raving about a year ago. But I first encountered material on becoming a "pick up artist" wayyyy back in 8th grade. About 5 or 6 years ago. However back then I really didn't understand it. I've been studying it somewhat seriously for the last two or so years, but would always see a little bit of improvement then forget about studying my materials consistently. I've never been much with cold approaches (I get horrible approach anxiety and have yet to frequently overcome it) Though I do get opened at raves on a fairly regular basis. I'm familiar with DD and RSD. I like RSD more though just because it feels more right to me, it deals with much of the inner game stuff which I've always had a problem with.

My hobbies mostly consist of partying, going to raves, gloving (gloves with L.E.D. lights in the fingers to trip out high kids), Rallying when I can, generally driving around recklessly, Riding my dirtbike when I can, hanging out with my friends, smoking hookah. All that fun stuff. I'm a student at Portland State University, studying Psychology. I got into it mostly because of all the pick up material, the dynamics of social interaction is something I find to be quite unusual and very interesting. Personal growth and development are hugely important to me, I feel like it is the most worthwhile pursuit one can have.

My goals with becoming excellent in the game are pretty straight forward, bring more attractive high value women into my life, give myself the option to choose the girl that I want. Not get my ass shoved in the friend zone! Be the one to break up when I think the relationship is starting to crumble, not get dumped or hurt. Basically I just don't want to get hurt by caring to much anymore. Or caring about someone who doesn't back, caring about someone who has shoved you in the friend zone, even after doing things with you. getting used, getting led on. Those all are things I want to end.

I've always been a very shy, awkward, and introverted person, up until fairly recently when I started to go out at least once every weekend and started to meet people. I'm still pretty self conscious and shy but I have had a noticeable increase in my social skills. I've never really had a girlfriend that's lasted more than a few weeks. I have had some "relationships" that have lasted longer but nothing sexual happened with those. I am not a virgin, but it's been longer than I care to admit in my introduction since my last time. lol I've even had the opportunity to as well, like girl saying she wants to fuck me and in bed with me but I didn't do it for some reason. (some limiting belief or something I would guess), and the fact that there were 3 people passed out in the room. Only one I was not comfortable fucking next to while they were asleep.

Now the reason I signed up for this forum is a specific one. I vowed myself next time I was rejected, thrown in the friend zone, or had my heart broken, I would become a player, be done with all that emotional attachment bullshit for a while, till I got solid game and didn't have to worry about those things as much. Well last night that happened. This girl I've been talking to since last August, we flirted all the time, she'd sent me pictures of her in her underwear, said she'd had x-rated dreams about me, she was the one who was even in bed with me wanting it. I did finger her, but I did not seal the deal and I kick myself for it still. She'd said she loved me, which was when I let myself go and start really caring.

However I FUCKED shit up, and I don't think she ever really forgave me for it. In my opinion it was all a mis-communication but she thought I was lying and deceiving her, basically I said I would stay sober if she came with me, not in any situation. which is what she thought I meant. Then last night she said she just wanted to be friends. Now she had said that before, but then later would sit on my lap, hold my hand when I took it, ask me to go with her to get a vibrator, and even sent me another picture of her in her underwear. So I thought she was just saying that. But last night it basically came down to "friends", or GFTO.

To be fair, her super abusive ex(sort of)boyfriend had just OD'd on Heroin and got put into rehab a week from last Friday, and I was the only one there to comfort her, basically making myself completely available anytime she needed me. She pretty much got dumped by him the last time because she chose to go to a rave with me on new years instead of go hang out with him. I donno how things changed so drastically.

But this was the last straw for me, I KNOW I can get 9s and 10s. She was a 9, the last girl that I got super into me was a 10 on my scale. But I dropped her because being 3 hours late when you say you're almost there is not acceptable. I want to be able to get that outside of my social circle, get these girls back to there place (preferably, as I still live with a parent) and hook up with them. I want to build an abundance mindset, not be afraid to go after, and do what I want, and above all to find someone who is worthy of me and I want to spend my life with. After getting a ton of women would be good too. lol

Kinda long, but this Just happened like 8 hours ago and I still haven't slept so I needed to get it out. Anyway yeah That's why I'm here, I know I can learn a lot form this forum and I will try and stay active on it as well. Thanks to anyone who read through all of that haha Any comments, ideas or constructive criticism would be much appreciated.