First off I'd like to give props to every guy here that has the balls to do what you do. I admire all of you........

I'll try to sum this up as best as I can.

Just to give you a backround Im 20. Training to be a pro wrestler. I look unique, fit, but deep down I'm insecure about my looks. Sometimes I'll look in the mirror and think damn I'm hot...other times I wish I can fix things. I tend to over analyze my insecuties and swim in my own head. Sometimes I feel like the most bi polar son of a bitch out there. In a span of 10 minutes I can go from confident about how I look to insecure...and vice versa.

Since I've moved to the NYC area to train for my wrestling I stopped partying. Im down to party more moderately, but when I was back at home its all I did. I lOOOVED it. I found that before I even knew about "the secret" to scoring with woman I was doing it already...only problem is I needed the booze to do it. When I drink I don't CHANGE...I just get the motivation, enthusiasm, wittiness and ballz to get loose with my lips. I was perceived as charismatic, and lots of people called me THE PARTY. Girls gave me all the signs in the world...but since I've never actually had FULL FLEDGE intercourse, I was to insecure about my lack of experience to go through with the girls all the way...

Now that I've moved to nyc and know no one, i'm even more insecure...I've never really been with a girl, or had full fledge sex and thats my biggest block. Along with my lack of enthusiasm and swimming in my own head. Now that I'm sober 95 percent of the time I feel like I lost a part of me. I'm perceived as "to normal"...soft spoken and nice. I know what I need to do, but I wanna be able to do those things with the use of booze. What I'm asking from you is advice....

On one hand I don't have the balls to walk up and approach girls and when girls talk to me I have a mental block and dont know a way to turn things around and say a witty remark or make her laugh. Im a security guard and I stand there so tooons of cute girls walk by and ask me questions about where things are (which I have no idea where anything is)...Since I can't think of anything clever I usually refer then to another associate in my unethusiastic, soft spoken, shy, boring demeanor and thats that. IT SUUUUUCKS.

Whats some advice? Baby steps I can take? Enthusasm boosters thats not pot or booze...How can I make that inner me come out? What are some clever or witty things I can do when approached by woman themselves. Give it to me guys....Im desperate and at a shitty spot lol...

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My problem:

I need to release the inner me with out booze