| 2012 Update:
This is a report I wrote in October 2008, I was 19.
I had heaps of fun doing it and it laid the groundwork for all my Rapid Escalation adventures that would follow.
Physical escalation is an area of game that many guys overlook. They do countless approaches and have plenty of conversations but they just don't touch, get physical, try to kiss girls, or face rejection.
This mission is highly recommended, as you are actually out there learning through experience, the fastest way to grow.
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So I started my mission to get 25 kiss rejections tonight... boy am I glad.
On the way to the Nightcat we started talking to some girls, asking directions, bantering for about 3 mins, then as we were leaving 'Hey you have to say goodbye like the French' and lean in to kiss her...'errrrrrrrr no' she says awkwardly, giggles, and walks way.
Awesome. 1 done, 24 to go.
The rest were similar. Strong direct opener, good eye contact, grab them and try to makeout within the first 30 seconds. The thing I was most happy with was my post rejection reactions, or lack or them. I just smiled, told them they were cute and with a few just kept chatting to them.
One I opened with 'Wow your beret makes you look shifty like a James Bond villain', talked to her for about 4 minutes, really chilled out relaxed vibe and realized I was actually 'sarging' her, she said 'I wish people would surprise me more' so I said 'what like this?' and grabbed her head and went for the makeout. 'err no that’s just really forward' but we kept talking for another 3 minutes, and just as I was leaving she brought up a topic that I love, the different way people identify with subcultures and the reasons why. So I got her Facebook address.
I heard that most people can’t make it to 25 rejections before someone kisses them back.
This happened after seven rejections. Girl came up to the bar, I can’t even remember what I opened with, I was just really chill and in state, lots of smiling and good body language, said some bullshit about her earrings being cool and decided they deserved a kiss and BAM its on, she’s kissing back hardcore, all within 20 seconds. Most of it was my body language, smile, and the fact that I took ACTION. It’s a great lesson for me coz I usually talk too much. Such a paradox, you go out to try and get rejected and you get a makeout. We end up macking on at the bar for a while, get some good grinding and tit grabbing on, then she had to bail.
After that I did two more, the last one was the bartender at Nightcat had a red tea towel hanging out the right side, defiantly NOT the crip side (like in that snoop dog song ‘Drop It Like It’s Hot’). So I asked her if she was in a gang and where her blue flag hangin' out the left side was, talked for about 10 seconds and said 'Wow awesome you get a kiss on the lips' she laughs and pulls away a bit but I still manage to peck one on both cheeks. She jokingly says that she’ll have me booted out but I just keep talking to her for about 15 seconds (along time after you've just been rejected...think of awkward moments in movies....that’s the point I guess, I didn’t MAKE it weird) and we're both smiling, she even comes up later and makes a joke about her blue tea towel and how she changed gangs.
Beyond the makeout the things I got from this were:
-Being indifferent/unaffected. when you are TRYING to get rejected, you stop thinking about 'ohh I should use a neg' or 'what should I say next' your outside your head, really dominant, just thinking 'I’m a man and I want to lock lips with her ASAP' so you make it happen. This is the mindset I should be in ALL THE TIME.
-The fact that there ARE girls at clubs just WAITING for that dashing confident man to come sweep them off their feet. BE THAT GUY! I definitely would NOT have made out with that chick if I wasn’t on this suicide mission, I would have thought of openers to say, or analysed the situation a bit longer, or made up a reason like 'errr she’s not my type' or 'she’s too old' (I think she was about 25 or older.....in my experience they seem the most eager)
-Rate chicks by imagining fucking them. From afar the girl I kissed was 'cute' but not really 'hot' but once your kissing them you start noticing they have awesome boobs, their lips feel nice etc. Then you think about your dick in their mouth and its like 'mmmm yes that would be awesome' most of the time your lying to yourself when you say you wouldn't kiss a girl. My friend says you should think about fucking them and most of the time you would say yes...so stop lying to yourself, and start going for girls YOU think are hot and would hook up with, not what your friends might say. I never had a problem with this in highschool, coz I KNEW that whenever I hooked up with someone all the guys bagging me for it would hook up with her in a SECOND...and most of them admitted that to me one on one hahahah. Anyway the reason I re-realized this was coz my 'standards' got higher when I started picking up more after reading the game, but it’s good to be honest with yourself about who you would and wouldn't do. Before tonight I would have prefered to not pick up than drop my standard but now it’s more open and fluid than that, whatever happens, happens.
-The downside was the first few I noticed that I was leaning in for the kiss but it was half assed and I was WAITING for a rejection. This shouldn't really count, I’m not gonna do anymore like that. It’s gotta be set in my mind that we ARE about to kiss and she can just choose to not kiss back.
So that’s NINE rejections all up. Going out tomorrow to get my other 16 or so rejections under my belt. This stuff does wonders for your outlook. I recommend everyone do it...what do you have to loose? (Maybe your front teeth to an angry boyfriend? damn I wish I hadn't thought of that)
If anyone else does this post it in this thread aswell. gonna try and do some day game ones aswell.
EDIT: More things i realized this morning...a bit of ramble but I’m trying to piece together everything I learned last night and typing it out is the best way.
-I ended up opening STRONGER than usual because I wasn’t outcome orientated. I wasn’t trying to IMPRESS them, or do a super DHV attack, I just needed to be in a convo with them for TEN seconds so I could go for the kiss. The SOLE purpose of my openers were to TALK to a girl, get the interaction flowing enough to kiss, so I wasn’t using opinion openers, sometimes it'd just be 'HEY' or 'aww your not dancing?' so this attitude actually turned out positive, the girls responded BETTER to this than they usually do to my openers. It showed me what I’ve been hearing for years...you can open with a smile and good eye contact.
-Aside from the opener, but in terms of the whole interaction, I think it took away the idea that I was trying to *get* something from the girls. I wasn't worrying about how I came across because I genuinely didn’t care, but again paradoxically this helped. EVEN with the chicks who rejected me, not ONE went 'ewwww' and looked actually disgusted, most were still in a good vibe afterwards, and kept smiling, bantering and vibing with me. This part whole 'not being needy/taking something' is SO important for my development right now, because my actual mindset has been from a 'take' point of view recently, like 'I need these girls to give me something' and I was over thinking everything. This has freed me up so much. The other night after my band played at The Espy I was kinda floating around with my wing and my mindset was 'where are all the sets? Let’s open her...err we should open soon. Wait are we standing in the right spot? Do we look like douches now? Think think think what’s a good opener? Oh no that wouldn’t work. Now I’ve waited too long!' etc. When your going for rejections you stop caring about logistics so much and you don’t let them get in the way of you having fun and ultimately your awesome state. So that’s the mindset I have to be in from now on.
-The funniest thing maths wise is i used to tell my friend 'Yeah man the games awesome, most guys are too scared to get rejected, but if I try with 10 girls even if I get rejected by 9 I still kissed one more girl than the guy who approached zero...this was just a metaphor in the past but EXACTLY what happened last night, right to the number.
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UPDATE
Ok I’m up to 11 now. I went to Spark’s approach seminar and on the lunch break I did two more. One was a 2set who I asked for directions to the food court, and then they were going that direction too so we walked with them. I was gonna wuss out and not do it, but my wing came down on me hardcore with his list of logical reasons why I should JUST DO IT. Seriously if anyone needs a good kick in the ass, a verbal animal-style flick in the nuts, go out with this guy. Even before i joined the lair he’s kicked my ass into opening on multiple occasions. It was him that psyched me into doing the 2nd k close attempt at the night cat, and JUST before I did it I was all like 'listen man I know your trying to help but DON’T tell me what to do, I just want to have my own journey and go at my own pace' then he was like ‘NO JUST DO IT WUSS.’ and then after I did it I said 'yeah I lied I really DO like it when you kick my ass and force me to do scary stuff'. Having a wing who will bust your balls when you pussy out is awesome.
ANYWAY
They stopped at a clothes shop, I asked them what they were buying and they said 'a boyfriend present' . I asked her which one had the bf...it was the less hot one!! Wooo, so I tell the hot one that since she’s single we better make out. 'Nooo!' with a giggly squeal. I just walk off confidently like 'meh' but I’m thinking I should have stuck it out a bit longer. Then again, it’s normal for drunk dudes to do weird shit in clubs but in a shopping centre...she might have called the cops hahah.
I had been telling jboy about forgetting the 3second rule and how it’s NEVER too late to approach...like if you walk past a chick there’s nothing wrong with running back to her if shes 30 ms away. Why wouldn't she want a hot guy like you to come talk to her? anyway we were outside chilling on the break, I was talking to jeks and mildawg and I see this cute as petite chick across the street...I trail off what I was saying to jeks and bolt across the street, around a tram and moving cars, and she’s like 100 meters away by now, so I have to run a whole block to catch up to her. We were just practicing loud voice projection and opening with tonality so I yell 'HEY' she doesn't look back, probably thinks I’m talking to someone else. I catch up to her and say 'hey...I saw you from across the street and just wanted to tell you that your gorgeous' (big grin gleam in my eye) she’s a little wierded out but says 'errr thanks' and I say 'I gotta give you a kiss' and lean in. She turns so it lands on her cheek. Then I bail. Kiss closing is a lot harder in the street after talking to someone for 7 seconds.
BUT BUT BUT BUT BUT===================
I realized a BIG mindset/reframing thing that you have to approach this mission with. Thanks for jekkle and eckorock for pointing this out:
It should be called '25 k close attempts within the first 30 seconds, WITHOUT using ANY other tactic, attraction technique, line etc'
this is how i was going with it anyway, thought id point that out for anyone else reading. go in with the INTENT TO KISS THEM. the first few I found myself kind of accepting my own reality that she wouldn't kiss back, but you have to lean in like you ARE going to kiss them and whatever they do is their choice, not your problem.
I have no trouble k closing, for me this is not about killing k close anxiety. This is about :
-pushing myself to express my sexuality EARLY to avoid boring convos.
-to get outside my head and just flow freely when I’m out
-not reacting to rejection in a negative way.
-not being needy when opening, and opening ANYONE who I think is hot, no excuses. Because I have a clear mission, to kiss them.
UPDATE
I’m up to 12, I did another last night. I was IN with this chick doing bad boy style game telling her how I lie to girls when I take their number and tell them that I’ll take em on a date but really just want them to come pay to see my band, and she kept the whole 'your such a jerk' but stays talking to me for 15 mins after she could have left. BUT then I found out its my friends little sister.......damn.
I was bagging her about having no friends and she kept going 'I SWEAR I do they're upstairs!!' taking the bait like a child. Anyway later this stunner blonde said something about no friends and I said 'Omg I know someone else in your boat you can be her friend!'
Grab her hand and lead her upstairs, through the D floor, back downstairs, find my friends sister and introduce them. The amount of compliance I had then should have been rocking but she was hyperactive and got distracted easily. I figure me standing there while she talked to her friends broke my 'strong leading man' frame to 'needy guy desperate for her company'. So then I thought fuck it, its escalate time, kiss on both cheeks, go for lips, no deal. Stay smiling and talking to her for about 20 seconds then bail, so the count is at 12.
also a chick from primary school that I used to hook up with in year 11/12 was there and I busted her unashamedly crotch watching.
'Yo, what are you looking at my dick for?' I ask she just giggles and looks away. 'hahaha? your not even gonna deny it? wow I guess my dicks right at the front of your mind right now' and she just kept smiling and giggling. From that point on every time I talked to her it was pure sexual, just for my own amusement.
My wing: Yo we gonna bail soon?'
Me: Yeah I might cop a blowjob off her in the toilets first.
Her: What?
My wing: nah man I already jizzed in her asshole before.
Her: you guys are such jerks what the fuck! (hangs around us for the next two hours making excuses to kino us etc)
but eh you know what its like with girls u have history with, I wasn’t keen and just went home.
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UPDATE
Three more last night. First one at the Joint, I got rejected coz I lied about my age but my wing k closes her seconds later!
Then at pogo talking to this girl, dominant kino, bounce her to a bench to 'tell her this cool thing' she stays standing...'sit down your making me feel weird' (pull her onto the seat) talk a bit then her guy friend rocks up, BAM my wing "jizz" (wing-jizz? worst screen name to pick so many puns to be made) is on that in a second distracting him. I tell her she’s cute and go for the makeout, rejected.
Later her boyfriend comes up.
Him: 'yo were u hitting on my gf?'
Me 'Yeah man. She’s a total cutie'
Him 'hahah yeah man she is' (frame totally changes, he smiles, him and his friend and me start talking about exotic chicks coz she’s from Spain, later his friend buys my wing a beer and shouts him a smoke)
Felt good to be honest after my not being honest about my age in that other set blew me out.
Third one some girl bumped into jizz 'accidently', we start joking around with her, accusing her of sexual harassment, she’s making excuses to kino us etc. I go for the makeout, her WHOLE circle of friends are right behind her...shoulda bounced her to a secluded location. She keeps smiling flattered, we say bye and bail.
I’m glad to be leaving sets with a rejection rather than nothing, its helping calibration. To think I could have gone home last night having said 'pleasure meeting you' and ejecting from all those sets seems so silly. Every one is a learning experience, I’m making sure the gap between our lips is as small as possible now by whispering in their ear before I do it.
So that’s FIFTEEN, ten more to go.
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