What do you mean by keep falling for it Eddie Fews? Are you saying this second date was a bust and I should move on since she didn't want to sleep with me? And it will drag on like this?

Every time I have thought that way in the past, it was just me being impatient and I wait just a little longer and good things have materialized.

In some ways I get what you are saying, if things haven't materialized after two dates (and that is what I want) move on to one of the other girls that is willing and able.???

No.

Im speaking about the heightened level of emotional attachment you're forming for someone that hasn't even prove to you that they actually are what they are presenting themselves as. You're still new to this so you don't understand ones way of presenting themselves as something only for you to discover that they are not what they presented 3 months later.

Enjoy the girl, sleep with her, date her, but control yourself.

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Thank you for the advice! Point well made!! I get what you mean now. Probation period still. Make sure, she is who I think she is and what I need out of a women. Anyone can appear your type and easy going for a short period of time but will they be the same person once you hit a few bumps in the road or once the initial attraction wears off?

So, I will take it slow and continue seeing others girls meanwhile. Give it at least 3 months for her to continue proving herself before jumping into a relationship with a women.

You are painting her as some innocent angel.

I bet she's not.

And if she did have a one night stand, so what? Women like sex. Women want out of the mundane. They want passion, to catch a buzz, have mindblowing sex, for you to come on their face while they climax hard with a vibrator thinking about a threesome with another girl or guy, lol, then to snuggle with you and have you tell a secret.

They are highly intelligent wild animals, just like you and I. Not princesses.


Who gives a shit about any of that. You haven't even fucked her yet.


Ha, awesome. Love this kind of thing. Takes her off the pedestal and makes you equals.
There are no such thing as "classy" girls. Women are crazy intelligent wild animals that want insane, mindblowing sex and passion.

Go look at the romance book covers. There's a reason why those covers are that way. By being emotionally-centered and dominant, you will bring that out in her.

Haha, of course. You have options. You are a challenge. It's catnip.


Perfect. Do your place. No dinner, just a movie and maybe snacks.

And OP, if you want the "purest" girl, date 5's or nuns.

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Thanks arch staton and everyone else's advice. I am really trying to listen and follow suit.

Went to a movie then back to my place. She couldn’t stop touching me all night. Quickly got her naked. Then it was a good amount of two steps forward one step back. “You’re not taking my panties off!” Ya ya ya, eventually they did. We got up to naked heavy petting. Then “Were, not having sex.” Whatever you say babe. BUT she wouldn’t have sex with me no matter how many steps I went forward or back. No BJ too, just touching.

her: “I’m not having sex with you tonight.”
me: “What are you trying to say?”
her: “you are dating 4 others girls, I don’t want to just be another booty call.”
me: “stop thinking so much, enjoy the moment, you’re not” “and I haven’t slept with the other girls yet and I already got rid of 2 of them (I actually did)” (huge mistake to say this I am thinking, stupid me)
her: “i like you, if I sleep with you I will get emotionally attached and I don’t want my heart broken”
me: “ok, thats not my intent. I like you too. Stop thinking so much.
15 mins. later
me: “ok I need to sleep, you’re welcome to sleep here but it prob better if you go home so I can sleep in and you can get up early like you planned.”
her: “ok I will go home. Do you want to come sleep there?
Me: “Sleep and not have sex? no thanks
Her: Come to cooking class with me tomorrow at 3p?
me: "I think I will pass"
Her: I’d like to see you again before you leave for a week.....


1. Is there anything I could have done to jump over this no sex wall? Is it just a matter of being a bit more patient (this was 3rd date) I don't feel like I am waisting my time, I am legitimately having a great time when we are together.
2. I actually get a little bit of where she is coming from. If a girl told me she was sleeping with 4 guys, I'd be a little sketched out to have sex with her. But then again I'm a clean freak and don't want any stds.
3. I'm too busy too see her for a week. Is that a good thing or should I make an effort to see her again tonight for a few hours? I thought it was a good idea to turn down her friend style invite for today and only see her at night for dates.
4. Any advice on a next step? Don't hold back if you think I am being a complete pussy!

Hahaha awesome!

You know you are doing things right when this happens. The truth is, the thought of you having a harem and fucking four other girls gets the bad girl in her revving. Women LOVE it when their man attracts other women. It makes them horny as hell and territorial.

Nice work.


Yeah too much info for that situation.

You (with a grin): Come on woman, we both know you're the heartbreaker in this room.

Then go for the kiss, with your hands firmly on her back.

That right there would've gotten you at least a BJ.



Nope. Too analytical, not playful enough. Remember to remain playful/teasing.

Unnecessary, but not damaging.
lol, awesome. She wants it bad.
Yes. You were too analytical. Be more playful teasing when she puts up resistance.

Invite her over, IMHO.

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Next step is to go for it all the way- she's going to break down and give it to you. Take some of that Arch advice about being playful and up the teasing on your end. Don't give her what she wants and cement it in your own head that you see multiple girls. Once you got your identity down, she won't be able to resist. Girls on the low like guys who they can't tame. Hence the bad boy.


See her again, this time she will be less likely to give you LMR if you play it right. No more logical explanations, just keep it player.

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Thanks gentlemen. Happy to let you know your advice really worked. Invited myself over.

Remaining playful was key. Turning it back on her was also very helpful. Took a lot of persistence to get her to comply. Not forceful in any way, just persistent and playful when they tell you it isn’t going to happen tonight. There was a point where I was telling myself this is never going to happen for a few more dates. She was acting really hung-up on me seeing other girls. She said she was ok with it, but didn’t want to sleep with me bc of it!

As soon as I with-held kisses, it became her mission to push forward. As soon as she made it her idea, the walls fell down. It had to be her idea.

I like her, but trying to not get attached until she proves herself more as you suggested. She is pretty, has a great career, awesome personality, so different then the other girls I’m dating or have dated. Not the hottest girl I’ve dated, but overall a great catch for someone my age that isn’t looking for constant hookups. I don't have the greatest interest in the other 3 girls I am seeing, but will continue to see them, hook up, have fun until I see how things go with this one. I think that is the healthy thing to do.

Good to hear. Keep it player until then.

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