| Natural confidence
When people talk about confidence most of them see it as some kind of glow that a person has, others see it as something genetical that only some can get. To understand what confidence is we first have to define it.
Firstly, what is it not:
Misconception 1: Confidence is not the same as courage.
A courageous person is someone who can do something without any knowledge or skill in what they are about to do. Beeing courageous is something attractive, it makes the person appear as high status when the first impression is set. Confidence is something that lasts althrough the interraction and beyond.
Misconception 2: Confidence is not a state
Although emotions play a big part of what confidence is, not to forget your state of mind or mind set, it is not entirely what confidence is. Beeing extremely happy and through that expressing a fun state can get you far, but when someone with a stronger emotional state comes along the fun state can be broken.
Misconception 3: Confidence is not experience or skill
People with a lot of experience are usually called confident. It is not becouse they have a lot of knowledge or skill, it is becouse of something else. It is true that a lot of experienced persons have a lot of confidence, but some of them actually don´t. Have you ever seen a working man/woman that knew exactly what to do, but was really angry doing it, and saw absolutely no purpose in it? That is not very confident at all.
What confidence is:
Confidence is how much you believe and trust in your self. It is how credible you are to yourself. A person that doesn´t have confidence will not be followed. It is really simple actually. Would you follow a man that had no faith for himself? A man that didn´t really believe in his own values and didn´t follow his own sense of moral.
Confidence has three roots, and you can find all of them within yourself.
Passion, Vision, Action.
Passion is your emotional motivation and investment. It is how much you desire more of what you do, and how much you love what you are doing right now. If going out and socializing doesn´t feel like a treat for you, then you have to change. If you have trouble meeting new people, it´s ok. Get to know everyone within your own social circle. Every person that you normally don´t talk to, talk to them and get to know them in depth. Share your love and keep it alive.
Having a strong vision of what you want and where you want things to go are extremely important. When you first see a girl instantly follow your want in that moment. If a picture of you and her having extremely hot sex pops up in your mind then that is what you truly want. Focus on everything that is positive about her towards that goal. Reward those characteristics and bring more details and depth to them. Also, set up some general goals for what you want in the near future.
Action. Yes, you read it right. You actually have to do the things you are scared to do before you can be confident about them. There is no magic pill, you can´t suddenly wake up one day and be a completely new person, not even with proffesional help. What you can do is to gradually take steps toward what you want to be confident about. There is no shortcut.
The best way to gain unlimited confidence:
Find your purpose in life, and live on the path to getting there every day of your life.
Remember: No one is perfect, so never try to become that. There is always more to get out of life.
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