Can people be trusted?

blak000 · Posted: Tue Mar 25, 2008 4:45 am Post subject: Can people be trusted?

Ever since I got into PUA, I've been reading post after post of guys k-closing and f-closing girls with boyfriends. Some of these girls have been in these relationships for years. It's not just PUA's; practically everyone I know in my personal life has cheated at one time or another, including me.

This makes me wonder: can people truly be trusted in a relationship? Even though we might like to think our girls are being faithful, there are a lot of times when we simply don't know. How would we ever find out if they made out with some random guy at a club? As Style says in "The Game," women are just as bad as men when it comes to cheating - they're just better at hiding it.

I live in the U.S., and the divorce rate is at 55% right now. A significant percentage of first-marriage divorces are due to cheating.

I made up my mind quite some time ago to never get married. I think it's an outdated ritual, that can only work in a small, communal society with strict cultural mores. Divorce rates tend to be low in places where women experience low social status or are highly religious. In most Westernized areas, though, the large number of prospective mates and little threat of repercussions (e.g., social ostracism) makes it extremely hard to stay faithful in a long-term commitment (and many people don't).

So, what do you guys think? Can people be trusted in a relationship? Is it worth getting married or are we better off with non-committed relationships?

Chief · Posted: Tue Mar 25, 2008 7:00 am Post subject:

I have personally made the same decision to never get married. I too think that marriage is an outdated ritual, but I still think pair-bonds that last from a few months to a few years are still legit. Hell, I think people should get into committed relationship for even longer than that if they really want to, but I really don't think the law should get involved with that. Makes things unnecessarily messy.

People who have matured with enough wisdom can be trusted. These people have a clear understanding of themselves and what they want, and will communicate their desires authentically. These kind of people are rare, but those who desire commitment in relationships should strive for this sort of maturity...and should search for like-minded partners who share this self-enlightened commonality.

It's all a matter of who you're dating.

mozyFresh · Posted: Tue Mar 25, 2008 1:52 pm Post subject:

'Dont trust anybody'

(you cant trust yourself)

Roads · Posted: Tue Mar 25, 2008 3:29 pm Post subject:

1) Always trust your instincts.

2) Always make people earn your trust, not give it.

3) But do give people the benefit of the doubt...the first time around.

blak000 · Posted: Tue Mar 25, 2008 4:10 pm Post subject:

wakeboardr · Posted: Tue Mar 25, 2008 4:19 pm Post subject:

The only thing I'm looking forward for marriage is having kids, but I'm waiting like another 10 years before I do.

Beaker · Posted: Tue Mar 25, 2008 5:17 pm Post subject:

Becoming PUA has made me lose respect for most women.
Sad, but true...

Ka · Posted: Tue Mar 25, 2008 6:23 pm Post subject:

A friend of mine who is a prominent lawyer has a saying,

"Assume everyone is a thief and a lier, and you'll be right the majority of the time."

Now this may sound a bit paranoid...but this is how i internally think of everyone when i first meet them. After they earned my trust i give it to them and if my trust is abused a few times (varies on severity) then they are done.

One way i like testing people is to give them money/pay for something for them and see how they respond. If they eventually pay me back or do a favor for me i know they are at least somewhat trustworthy, if they wont help when i need a hand or dont offer to pay me back, i dont trust them.

JuanBond · Posted: Tue Mar 25, 2008 6:34 pm Post subject:

It's tough to consider long term relationships with the divorce rate we have today, but i think that it's possible that there are women out there that genuinely can be trusted. The good thing about being a PUA is that you can make a choice and you don't have to settle for a HB, that you don't fully trust, just because she's hot. It's very possible for a PUA to approach 1000 women in his lifetime. Out of those 1000, at least one is a trustworthy HB.

<Avesta> · Posted: Tue Mar 25, 2008 6:50 pm Post subject:

Trust is something I could never get out of a relationship. Society teaches us that we have to wait for "the one", our "soulmate", who we can build a fountain of trust for.

It's pure propaganda and does violence to our basic human instincts.

The notion of trust in a relationship is tyrannical and oppressive. It breeds psychological co-dependence on another person and, as a consequence, your self-worth becomes parasitic on someone else's existence. This is an extremely vulnerable place to be in. You become like a rabbit in the headlights. A person's self-worth can instantly be destroyed by the actions of their boyfriend or girlfriend. Anyone can open their mouth and profess their love and faith in a person. But, for me, that verbal guarantee cannot be a justification for putting my quality of life on the line.

This will only sound pessimistic to those who believe in investing propaganda in relationships. For those who see their own quality of life beginning and ending with themselves and not other people, and live their lives according to that general principle, then they should answer positively to the following question:

If a god-like voice said to you one day while you were alone, that you had to live the life you have now again and again, every moment being the same and occuring in the same order, what would your response be? Would you be happy or sad?

Your answer depends on whether you rely on yourself for your own quality of life, or whether you rely on the concepts which society tells it's members are the key to human happiness.

Don't follow the herd. Follow yourself.

Castnett · Posted: Tue Mar 25, 2008 11:40 pm Post subject:

Roads knows where it's at.
Trust nobody.
But, make people think they can trust you.

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