Hey guys,

I am new to this forum, but have been into the pua stuff for a long time, read a lot of books, but never posted on a forum before.

The reason is this girl that I know for like 4 years, we've always been in the same sport team. And she had this lame BF for like 2 years, after that she had kind of a bad BF for like 1 year who threated her like shit. Now she is single for about 6 months.

We've been very good friends, but she kept giving me alot of IOI's especially when she had that bad boyfriend. And she is always giving me direct indications that she liked me more that just friends. Especially now that she is single. I always told her that i think she is a girl i would marry, but not date. And that we could better stay friends.

So 2 weeks ago she seemed totally into me, she kept sending me texts and eventually she told me that she wanted to spend the night with me. She gave me a date, but i changed the date just because I wasn't able to let her sleep over that night. We called each other a few times, and hang out a bit. We kissed a few times, and I drove her home from practice, when she asked me to pick her up to watch a movie over at my place. We made out for like 3 hours, she seemed really into it. (we still had the sleep over date at this time).
So at the day of this sleep over date, she texted me that morning and said that one of her friends had suicide issues, so she had to go to her friend that night. And told me that we could move the date to the next day. (I thought it was a good reason). So the next morning she texted me again, saying she had to work in her parents store because one empoyee got sick, and she had to replace her, so she couldn't sleep over again. She was really sorry and asked me if it was possible to do it next week.
So I decided not to care about it, and not to contact her for a few days. Few days later, she asked me a random question in a text, I gave her a response, and I asked how she was doing. She texted back 2 days later she was alright.
So I decided to ignore her next text. After that she asked me to respond, which i did.

But now she stopped giving me IOI's and she seemed to have forgotten our sleep over date. But I am not sure if i should ask her about this date. I think it's a little needy.

What do you guys think, should I move on, or give this girl that i REALLY like, a change? She is a HB9 and I just can't stop thinking about her TBH.

Thanks!

Its pretty simple what happened.

Look, a woman will forgive you for trying and failing but she will never forgive you for not trying at all because you failed to be a man.

In other words?
She gave herself to you, and you pushed her away. Your a man, its your JOB to fuck her rough, to take her and make her feel like a woman.

By being AFC about it (driving her home from practice a couple times? Really dude?), you killed all her attraction for you. What is attraction? When she sees you as a MAN. Not as a friend, not as someone she'd like to get to know you, but when she recognizes that you have the qualities she is looking for in a man. By acting the way you did, by failing to close the deal, she lost ALL attraction for you.

This is a constant problem in the community. We think just getting their attention is fine and then they will forever be at our feet and so our ego is nice and flattered but the reality is NOTHING was accomplished and theres only yourself to blame.

Dont mean to be harsh but reality is.

Is there a solution?

Yes. Be a man. Stop talking to her for a bit. In fact as of now your new rule is this: for every 3 times she makes contact with you (txt, phonecall or wtv) your allowed to do so ONCE. Let her jump a little bit when she gets a text from you. In the mean time, take the time to build your life. BE ALWAYS BUSY. Embrace your passions. When she does return to you and your new attractive self, take her by the hand, look her in the eye and tell her "You don't want to know the things Im thinking of doing to you" and then pull her to your car/home/wherever and make her yours like a man should.

Love and lots of it
TheMack

_________________
DUDE! Take my free ebook... It's FREE --> http://centeredmanproject.com/

Thanks for the feedback TheMack!

I agree that it is AFC to drive her home, but in those situations, I don't quite know what to do. The thing is, when i really like a girl, it's hard for me to just be a dick and say no i got other stuff to do. What would be the best way to say no in a case like this?

From now on I wil start to use your rule on her. I usually do this on other girls, but i think i didn't use that rule on her because i was in her friend zone for a long time. But i got the point!

Also, I know how to attract a women, it's just that when i really like a girl, and i mean REALY, i am becoming an AFC and try to hard, and my game becomes weak. Do you, or anyone have a suggestion on how to get this out of my head, and stop being that guy?

Results are good so far, tried not to care to much for her anymore. She initiated like 3 conversations, 2 times a text, and 1 phone call. I just trew in some funny negs and she seemed to be interested again. She even asked me if she could see my match this week. I think i just need to thread her like every other girl ive dated, so being a man, and don't kiss her ass sometimes.

More suggestions are always welcome!

Glad I could help

The questions you ask are difficult to answer shortly, and they take years to implement, I'll try my best to be as clear as possible so you can start on your journey on the right foot, however, understand that everything I say has a deeper meaning to it, and you have to find what you can use in your situation and discard what you cant.

"I agree that it is AFC to drive her home, but in those situations, I don't quite know what to do. The thing is, when i really like a girl, it's hard for me to just be a dick and say no i got other stuff to do. What would be the best way to say no in a case like this? "

Honestly, it isnt AFC to drive her home at all. Most people in the community are entirely against any form of what they see as supplication. Look beyond the dualities of the community. What matters is you inside, not the exterior. If you allow other people's perceptions to define who you are as a person, you don't make for a very solid man do you? How can you put all this into practical use? Simple: You feel like driving her, drive her. You feel like telling her shes beautiful, tell her. But when you do all that, do it with no intentions at all. In other words, do it because you genuinely FEEL like doing those things, not because you're expecting a thank you or a reward. Thats the mistake most people in the community make. They suppress their inner feelings because they are on some great crusade against supplication, but they dont see that it could only be supplication if you ALLOW IT TO BE.

Why I called you out on driving her home? Because of how you felt inside, not the action itself. You keep mentioning how you "think shes into" you or how often she shows you IOIs and yet you excpect HER to pull the trigger.

So a code of conduct is what you want?

-As of now, Your a lion. You are no mortal, your a FUCKING LION.
Your life is directed by your passions. Dont have one? Learn to cook, learn to fight, learn to dance, FIND YOUR PASSION and let your life be governed by it. In other words: SHE IS NOT YOUR PASSION, LIFE IS. She is merely along for the ride

-As of now, you are a yes man. When an adventure opportunity presents itself, you make the best of it and TAKE IT. You have to walk 3 blocks or can take the train those 3 blocks and get there faster. WALK THOSE THREE BLOCKS, the woman of your dreams might be waiting there.

-As of now you are a lover of life, of yourself and of women. You have a thirst for passion, for adventure, and you don't have time to let yourself get bogged down with insecurity, doubts and indecision - those are feminine traits, they are not masculine. A man knows exactly what he wants out of life and takes it. He does NOT ask.

Once you master all these aspects, I promise you that not only will she look at you differently, but you will look at her differently. All of a sudden she's no longer a mind fuck - a man doesn't have time to obsess over a girl he isnt fucking. You will see her for what she is; a vulnerable, delicate and complicated creature, who just wants a man with a clear head to take her and make her his.

I'll share with you a funny story. Im seeing a girl I picked up last week. A day later, she was at my place. As she's sitting on my lap and fooling around with me, a guy called her. Not once, not twice, but 8 times over the course of the night. She explained she is kind of seeing two guys (as most hot girls do) and that they compete for her. This one was calling over and over to make sure she wasn't with the other guy. It made me think a lot about how I used to be. As she consoled him over the phone she had her tongue in my mouth. Every single day since then she has texted and called me, she has come over to my house, she has flirted shamelessly with me and so on. Why? Because I'm a man. I dont have time to call 8 times. Things are clear to me. I know what I want out of life and she doesnt have the right to be my priority. That is EARNED. I dont make complications because I do not have time for them. I do not get jealous because I KNOW that Im the best thing to happen to any girl I meet. PERIOD.

Does this stuff really work? While he calls and wines over the phone, It's me she calls and txts, its me she thinks about before going to sleep and when she wakes up.

Understand: You are in total control of who you are as a man. Your progress comes from within, and doesnt rely on the exterior. Take some time to define yourself as a man and then come back to this girl. She's not that special mate.

Love and lots of it
TheMack

_________________
DUDE! Take my free ebook... It's FREE --> http://centeredmanproject.com/

Hey Mack..

Kudos.

_________________
It's not who you are that holds you back, it's who you think you're not.

Anytime brother

_________________
DUDE! Take my free ebook... It's FREE --> http://centeredmanproject.com/

Hey Mack!

Thanks for your post, it worked out pretty well so far! Although I still have to work on avoiding obsession with a girl. Not sure why it's hard for me to get rid of that feeling. But luckily I have self disipline and can hide that feeling for most of the time.

Little story about last night. That "special" girl came over to sleep with me, but she pulled a LMR that she was having her period. And she clearly told me she felt bad about having her period. Now I know I should leave her and get another girl. But what if I really want to date her for a while? She is one of the most difficult women I have ever met, but that's what i fall for in a women, strange enough!

So what is your opinion, should I stick with her, and still apply your advice, or get rid of her, and move on. (Btw, she invited me to sleep over at her place).?

Thanks!

Decided to cancel all plans, and told her I just wanted to stay friends, nothing more. Realized it was not worth it. But the positive thing is, you can learn from your mistakes! Thanks for the advice. It ment alot to me! And i learned from you!

Hope to speak to you sooner or later Mack!

Im glad to hear that I helped. Listen, its not a question of hiding your feelings. Im telling you to do the opposite. You wanna call her? By all means, call her! You dont want to? Dont! Its as simple as that. Shed the feelings that you owe anything to anyone. AN exercise I did to overcome my addiction to reactivity is to turn my cell phone off for a week. People kept saying "what if someone needs you?" and I realized... wtf do I care if someone needs me? This is my journey and I need to make the changes I want. Its hard to get rid of your feelings of obsession because this doesnt happen overnight dude. This is a LIFECHANGING journey. The journey IS the destination. You wont get to a point where you could put down your guns and say "Ok, Iv gotten this part handled in my life". Thats the most common lie in the community today. Learn this and that in a 3 day seminar and your life will be changed. You ever seen a hockey player hit the ice even a month after he got off? Nowhere near as good as he used to be.

And dude... her having her period is not LMR, nor is it a test. She just had her period. it happens bro, stop overthinking. Why would you leave her and get another girl just because she has her period? Fuckkkk sometimes I feel this community produces more craziness than sanity. Listen to me dude, FORGET WHAT MOST PPL SAY. Most guys Iv met are keyboard jockeys with NO life and NO game. I personally have met most of the people talked about in the Game and guess what - not impressed. You dont want their lives bro, u dont. The only 2 people that I truly appreciated were Zan Perrion and Steve Piccus. Why? Because those two are REAL. Real about their intentions, about their feelings, about their emotions, real about life! They make no excuses and live it to the fullest.

Ouf, no more ranting. What Im trying to say mate is that If you like this girl, by all means GO FOR HER. Go up to her, spin her, take her in your arms and tell her how ravishing she looks! Play with her, have fun, tease her, push her away, pull her in, but more importantly - DO IT BECAUSE IT COMES FROM YOUR INNER CORE AS A MAN. Not because you want to post an FR, not because you think thats what the PUAs would do, do it because you are a man and you appreciate her as a woman. You do not need her in your life, because right now you have too much going on for you (if you dont, you need to sort that out but we discussed that in the previous post and I trust you started to work on that).

Also, you mentioned that you fall for difficult women, and dont worry - I do the same. Thing is, this gets tricky; Either you have self destructive tendencies and easily confuse obsession with genuine feelings (as we all have in the past) or you relish the challenge and genuinely see beyond her games and want what she has to offer. Either way, this i your life's journey, not mine. I can only advise based on my own experiences and as a Christian I do not judge others. What Im trying to say in simple terms: I cant help you, because I am not you

Luckily, what we talked about this entire thread is basically putting your life in order. Giving you a solid core from which to build on and create you an identity as a man. Once you have that identity, things become clear. You no longer have to think and react - you can now feel and act. Its empowering and it frees you.

SO my advice in practical terms: Find yourself. create an identity, set rules for your life and how you want to be treated. Once you have that, GO and enjoy life and everything it throws at you. If she crosses the line, end it. You dont have time to let negativity in your life. Its simply not worth the trouble.

All the best
TheMack

_________________
DUDE! Take my free ebook... It's FREE --> http://centeredmanproject.com/

You helped me more than ever, and I am more than happy to see people like you on this forum! I do have a passion in life, and that is my main priority in life. Everything that comes my way wil be affected by my passion. Even a girl of my dreams. The thing is, I want to live life to the fullest, and that sometimes means that I have to complete my goals in order to be happy. In this case, I want to be happy with the girl I talked about earlier in this thread.

I know i have to move on, but I can't forgive myself for what happend last night. Here is the story, after she slept over at my place. The very next day she TEXTED me: Hey, I had a great night with you, but I think you want more from me (a relationship). And I am not YET ready for that. But that doesn't mean we can't date anymore.

My reply was: You have got to be kidding me! Having 2 serious dates doesn't mean i want a relationship with you. Let's just stay friends, because I don't think its gonna work out between us.

She relpied: I am so happy that you feel the same way about it! But I just wanted to be friendly and tell you my feelings. Because I spend the night with you.

Next day she started to text me something irrelevant.

Altough this is a clear sign for me to just give up, and move on! Which is probably the best for me. And i never had this before with any other girl, but i just can't let her run away. I just CAN'T.

Is there anything i could do or say, that would change her mind? Or was my reaction the thing that fucked it up? Or is it something else i did. Or something else i can still do?

Hope you can give me the final piece of advice Mack, your the man!

Thanks alot!

What about just calling her, and ask her what her intentions were with dating me?
And asking why she she didn't want a relationship yet, but still wanted to date?
I really feel like doing that, what do you think Mack?

What about just calling her, and ask her what her intentions were with dating me?
And asking why she she didn't want a relationship yet, but still wanted to date?
I really feel like doing that, what do you think Mack?

Mack I read posts on here that have nothing to do with me to hear great replies, you are by far one of the most influential person I have met on this site, you speak your mind and I respect that. Seriously you can help people in a lot of ways, not just attracting woman. Out of curiosity did you ever study human psychology?

_________________
Best of Luck
-Raphael

Aspiring Artist

Read the adventures I take as I discover my way towards becoming a mPUA or a dPUA (decent PUA) including completing the StyleChallenge ---> raphaels-journel-vt119594.html

Im glad to hear that you have passions, and there is nothing wrong with wanting to be happy with a specific girl, we all have different reasons for joining the community and no one has a right to downplay your desires or call you AFC for it. Im just trying to be as clear as I can that you have to differentiate between desire and need. Once you live fully within yourself, and have the courage to go after what you want, you will become a fulfilled man. Most people live their lives based on needs they think they have. Surprisingly, we need very fucking little to survive, we are just conditioned to think we do. Understand that and free yourself. How I started to realize this was when I turned my cell phone off for a month. I realized I checked my phone every 5 minutes checking if a girl texted me. I would go out with friends, but could never enjoy it fully unless I got female attention out of it and so I would text like 5 or 6 girls. How many of those do you think I ended up banging? Not many eh? Because they sensed the neediness. They sensed that something was missing, regardless of what routine I used or whatever. Thats the thing with most of the community, they could go and pickup a girl in a club or bar, but how long will that girl stick around? Not too long once she realizes most these guys have no life outside pickup. It isnt a mask you can put on and take off whenever you want, it just isnt.

I digress.

"I know i have to move on, but I can't forgive myself for what happend last night. Here is the story, after she slept over at my place. The very next day she TEXTED me: Hey, I had a great night with you, but I think you want more from me (a relationship). And I am not YET ready for that. But that doesn't mean we can't date anymore."

You havnt taken the time to figure out EXACTLY what you want and what you're expecting from her. You havnt told her exactly what you expect too. By continue to date does she mean use you for lifts? I dont know if you pay for her or not but if you do, STOP.

"My reply was: You have got to be kidding me! Having 2 serious dates doesn't mean i want a relationship with you. Let's just stay friends, because I don't think its gonna work out between us. "

You reacted. You came from a place of reaction rather than action. She tested you and you arnt solid so you failed. How can you pass smth like this? "We'll talk in person" or "Take the time to figure things out" or the best answer to everything "thats cool, if its meant to happen, itll happen". Either way, dont react to her bullshit. You dont have time to worry. A good thing you did was end things and put her in the friend zone, which is why she even bothered answering this:

"She relpied: I am so happy that you feel the same way about it! But I just wanted to be friendly and tell you my feelings. Because I spend the night with you."

Do you feel the same way about it? No, you want more and you are suppressing your desires because acting on them would risk you losing her. Thats what Im getting at here - free yourself! If she can cause emotional reactions, she owns you, and why would you want that? You have more important things to do in your life than to worry about a girl. Her "wanting to be friendly and tell you her feelings" = buyers remorse. At the time she felt comfortable with you but now she cant justify why. Do you blame her? She can smell it off you. You want her terribly, your a supplicant now. Wheres the value in that? BY SUPPLICATING TO A WOMAN, YOU ROB HER OF HER FANTASY OF SEDUCING A MAN SHE DOES NOT DESERVE.

"Altough this is a clear sign for me to just give up, and move on! Which is probably the best for me. And i never had this before with any other girl, but i just can't let her run away. I just CAN'T."

That my friend is why it pains me to tell you that in all likelihood, you will not get her. Im sorry brother, but you have failed Recognize that these are not genuine feelings, merely obsession. We've all been there bro and it aint fun. But you can look at it two ways: 1, negatively, and thats probably how you see it now so why should I bother writing it out? There is option 2. Change your perceptions bro. Be happy that you had this experience, because now you learnt what you want in a partner. Now you learnt the behaviors you are not willing to put up with. Thank the universe for this experience. People sob all kinds when they get one-itis, but why worry? If your dream girl exists and you met her out of 7 billion people on this planet, the probabilities of there being another girl just like her, if not EVEN BETTER, are HUGE. And unlike our AFC counterparts, we dont have to wait 10 years to find her, we can step out of our house RIGHT NOW and meet 10 new girls RIGHT THIS INSTANT. If in those 10 you didnt find anything you like, GO TALK TO ANOTHER TEN. DO it with the intention of spreading love! Be curious about people, get to know them and always give your best self to everyone. You will start living a fulfilling life quicker than you know.

"Is there anything i could do or say, that would change her mind? Or was my reaction the thing that fucked it up? Or is it something else i did. Or something else i can still do?"

Turn your phone off. Find yourself. Stay away from her for a bit. I dont give a fuck how angry at u she gets for disappearing. Make yourself unavailable and figure yourself out. It takes time - the journey is the destination. Work on yourself non stop and maybe in a bit youll realize you dont want her after all? Who knows. Anyway the only option you have left now is to fix yourself. Make a list of things you want out of life, and then go for it! Things you can improve: have u ever sarged a girl in front of 4 other guys? Do it! Push your boundaries, it makes you a man. Eliminate neediness, insecurity, and any other feminine quality that hinders your progress. What do u wanna learn? Cooking? Take a class. Learn a martial art, the point is HAVE A LIFE. DHV stories are for ppl who hide behind computer screens and need to think long and hard to come up with anything cool. Make it a habit to do something crazy at least once a week. Youll never run out of things to say again.

Who knows, maybe one day shell run into you again and you two will fall hard, or u can just bang her its up to you, the universe is full of surprises.

"Hope you can give me the final piece of advice Mack, your the man!"

I didnt realize I was on my death bed Im here as long as you need me mate.

Love and lots of it
TheMack

_________________
DUDE! Take my free ebook... It's FREE --> http://centeredmanproject.com/