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Vounder
New to PUA Forum
Joined: 17 Jan 2008
Posts: 4
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 Posted: Tue Feb 12, 2008 8:09 pm Post subject: What do I do????? |
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Ok you see
Recently I've met this girl who i kind of just wanted friends with benifits
I've told her that many times
But now she thinks were dating or "seeing each other"
So my question is how can i get it back to just friends with benifits or is it just a lost cause?
Last edited by Vounder on Tue Feb 12, 2008 11:28 pm; edited 2 times in total |
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JSmooth
PUA Forum Leader
Joined: 20 Oct 2007
Posts: 2448
Location: Nashville
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votes: 25
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| Posted: Tue Feb 12, 2008 8:21 pm Post subject: |
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So as I understand what you are saying, "Banging relationship" meaning basically just friends with benefits or lack of better terms a F-Buddy?
You said that she seems to think you are dating or in a relationship. Keep in mind that men are more naturally emotionally detatched from the act of sex than women. Physically and Emotionally women subject themselves to a greater risk when having sex. The act of sex as a general rule they will become more attached to a person, because of the greater associated risk.
The next question becomes did you say or do something that would lead her to believe that you have a relationship of more than F-Buddy's? Did you take her somewhere, buy her dinner, invite her over for a non-sex related get together, call her just to chit-chat? She may have gotten something that she interpreted as a mixed signal.
From personal experience I can tell you that the best thing you can do is talk to her about the situation. It may not go back to being what you had with her, but you owe it to her to ensure your relationship is outlined properly. Remember this, the longer you wait to discuss this with her the worse it's going to be for her. Better to do it face to face than over the phone.
GOOD LUCK!!! |
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LuvShaman
New to PUA Forum
Joined: 11 Feb 2008
Posts: 13
Location: California
Reputation: 2.4
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| Posted: Tue Feb 12, 2008 8:41 pm Post subject: Re: What do I do????? |
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| Vounder wrote: | Ok you see
Recently I've met this girl who i kind of just wanted a banging relationship
I've told her that many times
But now she thinks were dating or "seeing each other"
So my question is how can i get it back to just a banging relationship or is it just a lost cause? |
Well there are a lot of variables here that are unknown, but from what you say it reminds me of the type of girl that will use the sexual relationship to reel you in to a "seeing each other relationship". It's possible that she also could have initially been interested in the "banging", but there are studies that state that the chemical oxytocin is released in men and women during sexual orgasm. It may be involved in adult bonding. So it looks like she may have bonded with YOU...oh oh. You're screwed...j/k.
ADVISE:
If she's trying to reel you in I would take a break from that "relationship" since that's not what you want. If she has bonded do the same but be more cool about it cause she probably doesn't realize what's going on. You should be seeing other women anyway since it seems like your not interested in a "seeing each other" relationship. You can usually reconnect with that girl later on if u end on a good note. |
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