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PostPosted: Tue Oct 12, 2010 4:14 am 
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. . . and see how far that will get you.

Although I copy/pasted this PU cliche' from a recent thread in this forum, I'm sure you've all heard it before.

Here's my answer to this rhetorical 'pick up quiz':

You'll go a long fucking way(actually, the longest and greatest possible way) as long as you're the right guy, doing it the right way, with the right girl, at the right time. Yeah, it seems like a lot of things have to come together but the truth is that all the things that your mom taught you,(if she's a caring, good person) is 100% right. The only thing she didn't count on was that you'd be going after the blow job queen of your school and you'd be going after them with the goal of becoming the 17th blow job recipient of the year. A flower for the blow job queen in order to get a blow job? Are you kidding?

In reality, a flower and being 'traditional' is the stuff of dreams. This is what lands the 'keeper'. Ask all the ol' guys and ask them how they hooked up with their wives of 50 years . . . Ask them if they asked the girls if 'they looked like a drug dealer'.

You're just not doing it right. Here's why:

1. You're the wrong guy. The majority of the threads here are filled with guys requesting advice for how to get in the pants of slutty girls or girls who are currently dating assholes. The logic is that if these girls are fucking guys who seem like losers to you, these girls wouldn't mind fucking you. But herein lies the problem. You ARE SUCH A LOSER (and you KNOW IT) that you gravitate towards girls who ALREADY give head to other losers. Even the most dimwitted sluts can smell this crap from a mile away and will reward you with a middle finger. The smart/nice girls will always give you a smile but will keep you way, way out of her life.

Solution: IS NOT to look at yourself in the mirror telling yourself that you're a winner 100 times a day; this would simply make you a delusional loser. Instead, simply go out and kick start your life and become a winner. Win at ANYTHING. Go pick up chess. Pick up a sport, an instrument, a form of art. Gardening, mowing the lawn. Do something . . . anything . . . work at it. Become the best at something . . .

2. You're doing it wrong: A flower is just a gift. Yet, most guys treat it as a purchase order for sex. They buy flowers and ask the girl out. They buy flowers and as her to be her girlfriend. They've just turned this beautiful gift into an ugly contract that most girls will never, ever sign.

Solution: Learn to give . . . I mean really give. Be generous. Be fun. But most of all, just give. Why not buy her flowers and go, "Oh, ever see the flower shop on ____ street? I was walking by and saw these. . . I thought you'd like em'. Hey, there's this little cat there that plays fetch, the lady has this rose shaped fetch toy and the cat grabs it he looks like don juan or something, etc . . ." Be patient . . . you'll get your chance.

3. She's the wrong girl: Sorry, blow job queens can't appreciate flowers and kind words. This is just a fact of life. Blow job queens are blow job queens because they were treated like blow job queens, are being treated like blow job queens, and always will be treated like blow job queens. They are wired to be showered with cum, not flowers; this is their reality. In fact, if any of you have given flowers to blow job queens, you may have noticed them twist a rotten face, just as a "good girl" might, had she been showered with the cum of 10 guys.

Sure, you can get in line and treat them like the way her dad, uncles, and every man in her life did and does and get yourself a blow job this afternoon. The problem is, you're still the "wrong guy". You're not REALLY an asshole either. If you were, you'd be busy busting your nut with these sad chicks instead of lurking this forum trying to figure out how to do it.

Solution: Work on PU enough and you'll figure out how a 'nice guy' can still be the recipient of the 17th blow job from the local blow job queen. However, the real solution is to stay away. If you're NOT a loser, you really deserve better. But then again, take a look at yourself.

4. It's the wrong time: Healthy, balanced, positive girls set goals, they have boundaries. They usually abide by their rules and plans. I don't care what sort of whiz bang new PU trick you have up your sleeve, if a SOLID GIRL'S schedule (daily, weekly, life, etc . . .) doesn't match up with what you have in mind, she won't simply toss her life aside for you.

Solution: Go find another excellent girl whose schedule matches yours. Give her the flowers and a few kind words and see how far that will get you.


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PostPosted: Tue Oct 12, 2010 7:14 am 
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His entire rant was a total misunderstanding of the psychology behind pickup. If you're an alpha guy with a great personality, it doesn't matter if you hand her flowers or a dildo and be "traditional", you have a pretty good shot at her. If you know you already have her attention, by all means, be traditional. If you don't have the badboy streak, those flowers will be decorating the room where she's getting banged by the cheating outlaw biker/drug dealer. I've seen the best of women, and I mean the best, go this route and its pretty sad. I've seen guys I consider light years ahead of me in terms of having attractive traits get sidelined by these women. Great body, lived at the gym, well groomed, had good looks, had a decent paying job, went to college, went to church, was pretty fun-loving, all of the things this girl did/was also. What happened? She went for the tatted up asshole who cheats on her and barely ever saw her, and I can guarantee he never bought her flowers. We nicknamed him "homeboy". Couldn't make it up, its the textbook story of the asshole getting the good girl. It never fails. If you don't understand the psychology, you won't get it, and you'll either give up or settle for less. What for? Its a little more complicated than any one of us has expressed, and certainly a bitter guy who thinks pua is a scam about putting women on a different pedestal. If the guy actually learned what makes a woman attracted to you, its that you stand your own ground and bring a woman OFF the pedestal, even so far as to diss (neg) or ignore her, and it actually works. If he wasn't as analytical about it, I'd call him a troll, and it was an interesting perspective, but its just flat out wrong. He must have gotten ripped off.

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Last edited by Tundra on Tue Oct 12, 2010 7:24 am, edited 1 time in total.

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PostPosted: Tue Oct 12, 2010 7:17 am 
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Fantastic post on what's hemmed me up a couple of times in my life: pursuing the slutty girl and wondering why I wasn't getting what seemingly everyone else (in most cases this wasn't an exaggeration) was. These were cases where being the exception to the rule and treating them with respect didn't work. In the most recent case I wasted a fucking year pursuing this girl and for my trouble got to hear about her showing other guys a good time and saw it in person a few times. I think the time she invited me out to the country to ride horses for a weekend and ended up starting an affair (he was married) with a 53 year old by the time we left was when I realized something radical had to change about me. That hooker wrecked me, and was part of my motivation in joining the Army and subsequently reading all I could on pickup.

Avoid these not because you don't want to be #17 on the BJ schedule (I really don't mind myself anyway) but because it'll totally fuck you up.

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PostPosted: Tue Oct 12, 2010 1:20 pm 
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Good post that some basics for general dating/pua can be picked from.

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PostPosted: Tue Oct 12, 2010 3:26 pm 
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. . . where she's getting banged by the cheating outlaw biker/drug dealer. I've seen the best of women, and I mean the best, go this route and its pretty sad.
Now always but usually, scum love scum. Those chicks might tell you that they have everything together but the girls who habitually bang outlaws and drug dealers are usually pretty scummy and have a whole rap sheet of issues. You seeing them as "the best of women" is nothing but a pipe dream. Wait until they're over 30, they'll also look the part.


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PostPosted: Tue Oct 12, 2010 4:01 pm 
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A Major problem with this supposed idea that Kasabi has put forth is that this idea of being traditional cannot be proven or unproven bc...
Quote:
1. You're the wrong guy. The majority of the threads here are filled with guys requesting advice for how to get in the pants of slutty girls or girls who are currently dating assholes. The logic is that if these girls are fucking guys who seem like losers to you, these girls wouldn't mind fucking you. But herein lies the problem. You ARE SUCH A LOSER (and you KNOW IT) that you gravitate towards girls who ALREADY give head to other losers
Thus if a man cannot get a girl using traditional means he is attracted to the wrong girls. And to finish off this thought it is supplemented with rule 3
Quote:
3. She's the wrong girl: Sorry, blow job queens can't appreciate flowers and kind words. This is just a fact of life. Blow job queens are blow job queens because they were treated like blow job queens, are being treated like blow job queens, and always will be treated like blow job queens. They are wired to be showered with cum, not flowers; this is their reality. In fact, if any of you have given flowers to blow job queens, you may have noticed them twist a rotten face, just as a "good girl" might, had she been showered with the cum of 10 guys.
This causes any argument against kasabi's idea irrelevant. The logic is sound and cannot be unproven or proven. It blames the man or women for being a poor quality person.
I am annoyed that this idea is put forth at all bc back in the day I was the rite guy for girl x and she was rite for me she thought. I in fact did send her flowers. Why did it not work out between us. Bc I did not know how to create attraction or tension had no confidence, etc, things I have learned here.

But looking from the communities standpoint this idea is more hurtful than helpful to the PUA community. It allows guys to instead develop themselves to just say in an AFC Fashion she just wasnt the right girl for me, and even more AFC enables a man to say "She doesn't know what she's missing" acting like its her fault that she's not attracted to that guy, not bc he's a pussy or the thousand other reasons men fail soo hard with women.

This idea is trying to use logic in that best people go with best and down the line. The fundamental problem with attraction is that it is not based in the logical mind. 2 people dont just say to each I think your a quality person and the other person agrees and gives them their hand.

Lastly when I gave flowers I asked for nothing, so no one try to pull that shit.

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PostPosted: Tue Oct 12, 2010 9:56 pm 
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Okay, let's quit the hating. Kasabi, AWESOME. I'm just a fan of the spin you put on a lot of topics... it's more motivational and interesting than most.

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PostPosted: Tue Oct 12, 2010 11:08 pm 
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Traditional isn't bad, its not a slam on "classical romance", but when the guy says pua is a scam because of some pedestal replacement, its waaay too simplistic. The good news is the guy doesn't seem to be so lost, he took his asshat off and he appears to be listening.

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PostPosted: Wed Oct 13, 2010 12:36 am 
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A thread without a counterpoint is just one man speaking.
arguments allow the ideas to be hammered out and refined. I am providing substance so Kasabi can refine his theory.

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PostPosted: Wed Oct 13, 2010 1:12 am 
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No one here is "right", its a collection of experience. Endorsing traditionalism is a very 60-esque, anti-manifesto thing to do here, but I don't think anyone here thinks kasabi means to watch a romantic comedy and repeat "in-field". Some people are too hard on themselves when they don't get the results they wanted, and there is a conflicting message in pickup that says its always your fault. Knowing what you want before you go looking is a way to save some time and make yourself a better person. The blowjob queen and the good girl aren't going to go for the same sleezyness that some pickup-system offers. There are common traits, like dna, and that's what people should want to take away from it. A lot of pickup is very sleezy, club-game oriented, and its important to recognize that different people have different goals in pickup. Some want "SNL"s, some want "LTR"s, and I think a majority don't know what they want, they just want to get out there and hope something bites the worm and shows them that they have some self-worth, but that's probably the worst way to go about it. Chief's "list" can save a lot of heartache.

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PostPosted: Wed Oct 13, 2010 1:52 am 
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Social Conditioning anyone :D?


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PostPosted: Wed Oct 13, 2010 12:08 pm 
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Traditional isn't bad, its not a slam on "classical romance", but when the guy says pua is a scam because of some pedestal replacement, its waaay too simplistic. The good news is the guy doesn't seem to be so lost, he took his asshat off and he appears to be listening.
Who ever told you that it should be complicated?


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PostPosted: Wed Oct 13, 2010 2:13 pm 
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A thread without a counterpoint is just one man speaking.
arguments allow the ideas to be hammered out and refined. I am providing substance so Kasabi can refine his theory.
oh snap. the logic police are in town.

i agree with you jelly. this thread is very uninteresting.

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PostPosted: Wed Oct 13, 2010 2:23 pm 
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A Major problem with this supposed idea that Kasabi has put forth is that this idea of being traditional cannot be proven or unproven bc...
Nothing in PU can really be "proven".
Quote:
It blames the man or women for being a poor quality person.
I am annoyed that this idea is put forth at all bc back in the day I was the rite guy for girl x and she was rite for me she thought. I in fact did send her flowers. Why did it not work out between us. Bc I did not know how to create attraction or tension had no confidence, etc, things I have learned here.
"Poor quality" was not what I had in mind. What I wrote is that these types are the WRONG PEOPLE to partake in the traditional, open, honest, and friendly communication process. And you're right with your example. For whatever reason, you probably DID NOT KNOW how to create attraction.
Quote:
But looking from the communities standpoint this idea is more hurtful than helpful to the PUA community. It allows guys to instead develop themselves to just say in an AFC Fashion she just wasnt the right girl for me, and even more AFC enables a man to say "She doesn't know what she's missing" acting like its her fault that she's not attracted to that guy, not bc he's a pussy or the thousand other reasons men fail soo hard with women.
The idea behind my thread isn't to promote flowers and 'traditional values' alone. I was merely trying to shine some light on reasons how the flower route doesn't work and how this route still has its place in pick up.
Quote:
This idea is trying to use logic in that best people go with best and down the line. The fundamental problem with attraction is that it is not based in the logical mind. 2 people dont just say to each I think your a quality person and the other person agrees and gives them their hand.
You are correct that attraction is not logic based but you are wrong that the flower route is a "logical method". Take a look at young girls who get excited over movies where gentlemen give girls flowers and sweep them off of their feet. Girls do not get excited for the logic behind the film. They get excited because these scenes trigger emotions. Somewhere between these pure emotions and their experiences through life, some girls lose excitement for "traditional verbal displays of affection".

The cliche' in the pick up community is that these girls do not respond to traditional displays of affection because they've been hit on by these traditional methods often enough for them to be 'immune' to it. I disagree. Displays of affection alone aren't significant enough to change psychological response no matter how often or how many times girls are subjected to it.

More likely, it's the physical and emotional realities and consequences that have been associated with displays of affection that fuck people over. Abusive people hardly ever go on a rampage without shifting their positions through displays of affection. They might punch, rape, scream, and yell but quickly after almost ALWAYS tell their victims, "You know I love you right? I'm sorry . . . I'll neeeeever do it again. You're my sweetie pie." etc . . . They do this as a defensive mechanism. They do this to assure to themselves that they can't possibly be animals. If abusive fuckheads did not do this, most of their victims would leave right away. It's the duality of their personalities that keep their victims right where they are. It's ice cream one moment, a punch in the face on another. Horny guys lurking for BJ's basically do the same thing.

Go find a well adjusted girl with a healthy family history and show up with flowers.

This doesn't mean that girls who do not respond to flowers are 'bad people' or undesirable. You just need to trigger their emotions through other methods.


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PostPosted: Wed Oct 13, 2010 3:38 pm 
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Quote:
Jelly wrote:
A Major problem with this supposed idea that Kasabi has put forth is that this idea of being traditional cannot be proven or unproven bc...


Nothing in PU can really be "proven".
Nice, but if a guy does get rejected in PU another person can usually always pick out the points that were weak in their game.
Sometimes though in PU guys just get rejected for no apparent reason bc they were the wrong girl just as in your idea they were wrong.

and yes poor quality was not the right word it is subjective and ranks people making a good girl a higher quality one than a lower quality one.
Quote:
Quote:
But looking from the communities standpoint this idea is more hurtful than helpful to the PUA community. It allows guys to instead develop themselves to just say in an AFC Fashion she just wasnt the right girl for me, and even more AFC enables a man to say "She doesn't know what she's missing" acting like its her fault that she's not attracted to that guy, not bc he's a pussy or the thousand other reasons men fail soo hard with women.


The idea behind my thread isn't to promote flowers and 'traditional values' alone. I was merely trying to shine some light on reasons how the flower route doesn't work and how this route still has its place in pick up.
I just feel for the new part of the community that they should stay away from this idea, bc its shit like this that got them here. The confidence to give with nothing in return is not something a newbie could accomplish.
Quote:
You are correct that attraction is not logic based but you are wrong that the flower route is a "logical method". Take a look at young girls who get excited over movies where gentlemen give girls flowers and sweep them off of their feet. Girls do not get excited for the logic behind the film. They get excited because these scenes trigger emotions. Somewhere between these pure emotions and their experiences through life, some girls lose excitement for "traditional verbal displays of affection".
You are right to correct me, nothing in seduction or attraction is logical. Girls do in fact get excited and emotional, hoping this will happen to them, its soo romantic blah blah.
If anyone has seen any of Gambler's stealth attraction he talks about the idea you brought up. But he allows it to work in game, first he starts off with something really romantic and gets these feelings going in her and stretches it saying like look at the stars they are like blah blah, and keeps doing evoking this positive emotion in the women. B4 the women's socially conditioned emotion can rear its ugly head he starts turning it into a joke and they both end up laughing.

In all honesty I've never seen the traditional method ever work, except in movies. I've seen it fail epicly many times with many guys in high school,...shit girls arent socially conditioned yet, the social conditioning theory is out. Although those guys in high school were all nice guys.

Perhaps maybe a confident guy could use flowers and pull the girl he wants. But rarely does a confident guy ever do this even ones who are not PU's. Exploring why confident guys do not give gifts is an important question to be answered. Is it bc they all believe its only for nice guys, or do these guys believe gifts show weakness, This answer could provide insights, actually I'm going to go around today in my uni classes and ask some guys why they would or wouldnt.

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