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k_kriss
New to PUA Forum
Joined: 07 Oct 2007
Posts: 2
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 Posted: Sun Oct 07, 2007 6:10 am Post subject: Sophomore in College HELP PLZ! |
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Hi Guys,
Before you even read this, I just want to say I really appreciate YOU even taking a glance at this.
I'm new to this. I've seen the videos, I understand the concepts, I believe it all works if you do it right, and I even have a list of openers, negs, etc. But I have a huge fucking problem. I feel like it shouldn't be this hard for me because I am quite attractive. I dress better than average. I am not socially awkward.
My problem? Obviously, I have approach anxiety. But the sets that I do open, my mind goes blank. I always end up with nothing to say. I'll do my opener and that will usually be that. The girls don't ever seem to be that interested anyway. I will even remind myself of these negs or whatever before I go in, but when I'm in set, it just doesn't happen. It always happens that a few seconds or minutes AFTER I'm supposed to do something I realize it. I think I'm just ranting now because of my unsuccessful night.
Anyway, any advice would help. Thanks to all.
-KayKriss |
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arkmandluxe
PUA Forum Enthusiast
Joined: 07 Oct 2007
Posts: 84
Location: PENN
Reputation: 26.2
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| Posted: Sun Oct 07, 2007 6:20 am Post subject: |
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| You dont know what to say because you havent figured out what to say. In order to keep a convo going you need to first think of some things and memorize them. If that doesnt work than you can tell her how lovely she looks today or if you see anything around you thats interesting. If shes attracted to you she will also be commiting to the convo so dont stress about what to say. If you want more confidence so you dont blank out, tell yourself daily "Im Fuc*king hot and girls want me". |
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sirhenrywalton
PUA Forum Enthusiast
Joined: 24 Sep 2007
Posts: 34
Reputation: 26.1
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| Posted: Sun Oct 07, 2007 6:44 am Post subject: |
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I just recently got over my aproach anxiety, and getting through attraction. It helped me to have friend kinda learning this stuff as well, plus you have a future wingman. Get another AFC friend and kinda go into it as a game, just dare each other. It puts on the preassure to perform when you have friend in the same boat goading you, and when you do achieve, it's nice to have some one give you props. When you do finaly get into that conversation just tell yourself it's just casual conversation and having fun, you don't need anything from her you have all the friends and girls in the world. you will start being able to talk easier and things will just start to flow as you just keep practicing. If you feel like your completely out of things to say or are failing most miserably, remember you can always eject. Start getting comfortable with opening, then work with building atraction, and when your confident in that push yourself to get through comfort. Take it one step at a time. Like most things, you feel better when you set realistic goals, make sure you can achieve them, but don't make them to easy where there is no challenge. If you go out with a goal to get laid, and you cant get through comfort, your just setting up for disapointment. Baby steps  |
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k_kriss
New to PUA Forum
Joined: 07 Oct 2007
Posts: 2
Reputation: 0.2
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| Posted: Sun Oct 07, 2007 7:19 pm Post subject: |
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thanks for the help. the "baby steps" advice was especially helpful.
Does it ever seem hard to sarge at a college party because people are so cliquey? It just seems hard when people are hanging out with friends and you suddenly come in with some random question. you know they're all just thinking..."what is the deal with this guy?"..."why is he asking that?"...especially when there are guys there just staring at you, or even try to amog you..and the bitch shields are always up...even from HB6 and 7s.
Any advice on getting past all this and building value in settings like these? |
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arkmandluxe
PUA Forum Enthusiast
Joined: 07 Oct 2007
Posts: 84
Location: PENN
Reputation: 26.2
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| Posted: Sun Oct 07, 2007 8:17 pm Post subject: |
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| k_kriss wrote: | thanks for the help. the "baby steps" advice was especially helpful.
Does it ever seem hard to sarge at a college party because people are so cliquey? It just seems hard when people are hanging out with friends and you suddenly come in with some random question. you know they're all just thinking..."what is the deal with this guy?"..."why is he asking that?"...especially when there are guys there just staring at you, or even try to amog you..and the bitch shields are always up...even from HB6 and 7s.
Any advice on getting past all this and building value in settings like these? |
I love sarging at a college party especially if your with a wingman. Try to act cool and dont look around too much. When you enter the door girls look right away and make their first impression of you. I for instance, would walk through the door and pretend I was already here and just enjoying myslef. About going up to random sets in parties is really good. With all the booze and music people dont even pay attention to their friends convos and love to get to know other people. Thats why parties are made. Look, dont be shy to come up to people. If you see a group of girls just come up and ask"how you guys know each other". Just dont come straight at them like a shark, what you want to do is just keep walking and stop in the middle and begin with the opening. Ive had girls just coming up to me and talking cause i was with my wingman and telling me im cute, and some grabbed my ass(felt awkward since im new to PUA). Just pretend your having a good time and take deep breathes. |
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