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There was this old thread where someone was basically writing off the whole concept of day game, that it doesn't work, and that it's better to just live your life and see what comes, than have dedicated sessions of going out with the objective to sarge.
Someone said something to the effect of, "anything is better than getting rejected all day in shopping malls and on streets."
I actually wholeheartedly believed this, but saw some shit last night that completely melted my reality.
I'll give you the basic gist of how the night flowed. I met a fellow community member at this huge mall we have here in town. This guy's a self-starter who got into it by himself about six months or so ago, pushed himself, and only recently started bringing another guy or so out; but it's still really for his benefit and less to teach.
He exclusively picks day-type venues; malls, busy streets in the city, coffee shops. He walks right up to girls, says "excuse me" or something similar to get them to stop for him, and straight up expresses his interest, without giving any lines away; but I will say that it's not routine-ey at all, and he doesn't really change up what he says much at all, and continues to get consistent results. He mentioned that when he started, he did do indirect b/c it was easier to ease-into it.
No routines, no gimmicks, no nothing. Just straight up talking to strangers. He granted that doing it long enough has helped him with conversation and having more stuff to say to keep it going.
I was f'ing awestruck! Every girl he just went up to cold would stand there and talk to him for 10-15 minutes! And I don't mean simply tolerating him, just to be nice, while looking around; yeah there's a difference, and we all know that when we see it, but that's not what was happening here.
Then they'd give him their number, except one at the very end, who, after a lengthy conversation, said she just couldn't do it because she had a bf. (She had a pic of her bf on her phone).
As far as the "better than getting rejected in malls all day", I've got to wonder if someone who'd say that has even tried day game...?..
I simply didn't see the rejections. At all. It just didn't happen. No girl told him to go 'f' himself, no girl went over to her friends to have them all point at him and laugh.
The very first approach I will say that one girl glanced at him and kept walking. "Okay, that never happens." he said, and it didn't happen the rest of the night. He'll walk out of a mall after a couple hours on a weeknight with 10 numbers, and have 4-5 dates lined up that week!
This guy said he knew the only way he was going to get good is if he pushed himself and made himself do it. I asked, "What if the first 5 you ever did went like that cold-shoulder girl? Would you've given up?"
He said, "Nope. You know why? Because that didn't happen. It *doesn't* happen."
He has a unique mindset that pretty much any reason to not approach is an excuse. The only line he said would probably be legit to draw would be hitting on girls at work or in your building where you'd continue to see them, etc. (the don't sh*t where you sleep thing)
So I was then forced to go and approach a couple girls before I was allowed to leave, and I was scared sh**less.
I was of course nervous as f**k, and thought both interactions went horribly, but he said I did fine. Then reflecting back on both, these girls actually stood there talking to me. Both even kind of volunteered stuff almost as if to keep the conversation going. Then it hit me:
These girls want you to talk to them! They're giving you a shot, and want to see what else you can come up with, or offer up for the conversation. There's the mentality we've heard before that you'll automatically have a value boost simply from walking up and approaching. I saw it time and time again all night.
I've even seen that during the day, if you seem noticeably nervous, a lot of times the girl will make it easy for you because she knew it took balls to just walk right up like that.
In a bar, yeah, that effect might exist, but like below, it's not that hard or unique to approach a girl in a bar or club.
Based on the low yield I've been seeing of late with nightgame (I've actually met very few guys who get results worth mentioning during nightgame; me and almost everyone I know - it's hit or miss) I'm beginning to think that any jerk-off can have a few beers in a bar and go up to talk to girls. Do that and you're simply "bar guy number eight."
No guys are doing this because it's frightening as hell! If you take even a split second to think about it, it sounds like it'd be the most awkward thing anyone could ever do.
As I've been in game since Dec. or so of '07, and I know tons of guys who've deliberately, worked every dimension of game *except* day game, it's true, where I've really put game to use has been at night and in a a more theoretical context, like when I'm actually seeing a girl. (scarcity purposes, etc.)
I in no way expected to see what I saw last night. My reality just plain out melted! It's the most bizarre thing in the world that you can walk up to a girl in a mall, stop her while she's walking, tell her you're interested in her, and get her to stand there for 15 minutes talking to you, then give you her number, and later go out on a date with you. (as in another day, that she independently agrees to set time aside and come out to meet you somewhere else.)
I really think this is where it's going to be at for me.
hehehe! numbers don't mean shit!
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