Log #1: defining my goals.
Off to a new start.

Finding a job gave me direction, I now have a better vision of where I'll be in a few months... That's something I was clearly missing before. I also became more mature thanks to my previous journal (from-afc-to-pua-a-learning-journal-afc- ... 81510.html), I've learned a lot, even though I struggled to actually find the resources to put everything in practice. I know myself way better than previously, and I want to keep learning about my determinations and what I'm capable of doing.

Speaking about it, I would like to thank everyone for their support in my first journey, especially Kasabi, Hobbit and Insert who have always been there to challenge me and give me direction. But now it's time to let the past behind and start a new journey that better suit my desires.

I'd like to start by mentioning Daniel Balboa's amazing journal (all-that-is-man-daniel-balboa-s-journal-vt134792.html) which has been a great source of inspiration for me. I think his journal doesn't get the attention it deserves.

Having said that, let's begin this new journey by setting my goals and defining an action plan.
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My Goal.
As the title of this new journal explicitly says, my main goal is to awake the man in me. Cheesy? I'll grant you that, but this sentence does describe what I feel. I've never really had any masculine role models around when I was young, and I do feel like a grown-up bow sometimes... I've grown up, but never really develop the traits of what we commonly call a man. What are those traits? I've brainstormed a little bit and came up with three main categories of traits: Physical Traits, Mindset & Extras.

PHYSICAL TRAITS:
- Strong/Powerful.
- Class/Refined/Elegant.
- Clean.

MINDSET:
- Secure/Confident.
- Constant.
- Independent.
- Spontaneous.
- Serene/Relaxed/Composed.

EXTRAS:
- Creative.
- Educated/Cultivated.
- Charming/Charismatic.

My Plan.
Now that I have a clear view of the traits I want to develop, I need to define a plan to reach my goal for each of these main categories (Physical Traits, Mindset and Extras), but also a set of rules to prevent me from falling off the wagon.

PHYSICAL TRAITS:
> Working Out: I'm planning on subscribing to my local gym to get serious about this. [strong/powerful]
> Keeping a clean Haircut: Obvious. [clean]
> Keeping a clean Beard: Obvious. [clean]
> Getting a Tan: I'd like to have a better skin tone, I'm too pale. [clean, class/refined/elegant]
> Whitening my Teeth: Obvious. [clean]
> Keeping a nice Wardrobe: Dressing well is something important for me. [class/refined/elegant]

MINDSET:
> Working Out: See here above. [secure/confident]
> Approaching: I have a brand new vision on approaching that I'll explain later. [secure/confident, spontaneous, serene/relaxed/composed]
> Keeping Track of my Mood: I'll create an Excel file and grade my self-satisfaction on a daily basis. [serene/relaxed/composed, constant]
> Meditating: Obvious. [serene/relaxed/composed, constant]
> Speaking to Strangers: I'll start a conversation with a stranger at least once per day. [spontaneous, secure/confident]
> Organizing events with my Friends: Seeing friends regularly is important . [secure/confident]
(> Moving Out: I'm planning to move to an apartment closer to Paris in June/July. [independent])

EXTRAS:
> Get to the Next Level in Photography: I've hit a plateau lately, I don't have a lot of inspiration, I want to learn portrait photography. [creative]
> Read More: Obvious. [educated, cultivated]

RULES:
> No Fap: I've covered this a lot in my previous journal. [secure/confident, constant, serene/relaxed/composed]
> Sleep: Sleep at least 7 hours per night. [secure/confident, constant, serene/relaxed/composed]

My Horizon.
My journey will start on Monday, January, 7th and will continue until April. I'll post a weekly log and my plan will be updated after important milestones. The first (pre-)milestone will be a trip to Germany for New Year's Eve.
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Weekly Tasks:
So here's the weekly tasks until next plan update.
- Speak to at least one stranger per day.
- Meditate at least once per week.
- Work out intensely at least twice per week.
- Grade my mood/self-satisfaction once per day.
- Organize something with my friends at least once per week.


Time to take the road again.

_________________
On the Road to Manhood, my new learning journal: http://bit.ly/TEVapM
(My old learning journal http://bit.ly/eYRWL4)

Good luck! I went on a similar journey years ago when I first found the seduction community.
One tip I'd throw in, not that you asked - focus less on the steps and imagine your end result every day with an unwavering focus. The details of how you get there will fall into place naturally.

Week #0.
New Year's Eve in Berlin.

Context.
One of my friends invited me to go to Berlin to celebrate the end of the year. I joined 7 other guys (yeah, only men) in Berlin to have some fun and do some tourist activities. I've studied some years of German but have only the basics... I though Berlin would be a perfect opportunity to start fresh on this journal and put into action my new found inspiration.

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Day 1.
I was pretty excited to take the plane again, the flight was pretty short and got to the hotel pretty early at night. I didn't know the other guys, and I knew I had to leave them at some point if I wanted to approach my first Germans girls. I opened a group of 5 girls in a metro station since we were lost. They were giggling a lot in the process, they were way younger that I though but we had a little conversation and that was pretty much it. One had amazing green eyes, I made sure to hold eye-contact with her at some point.

We ended up in a bar and started to get some drinks... We talk for about 20 minutes before I opened two girls in the table next to us. I forgot what I asked but it was a pretty innocent question that lead to a whole conversation with the two girls. One of the was really cute, the other one wasn't interesting. The four of us spoke for 30 minutes about France, Germany, ... I teased the cute one but I couldn't escalate at all because of the situation of the tables. We ejected to join other friends in another bar after a while but nothing happened there.

Day 2.
Spent the day doing some sightseeing and wanted to go to a pub crawl at night. Unfortunately we arrived late and the starting point so we ended up going to a bar by ourselves. Nothing really happened, I was a bit frustrated I confess, we only had a day left in Berlin, and I hadn't done much. We agreed on going to a free city tour the next day and meet other tourists.

Day 3: making out with two girls for new year's eve.
We arrived early at the Brandenburg gate for the city tour, we went to the Starbucks. As I went to take a pee, my friend approached a group of two girls. I arrived at his level to introduce myself, they were two Brazilian girls from São Paulo. One of them was pretty cute, brunette Tanned Brazilian... the other wasn't interesting. We spent most of the afternoon together, I got several nice IOIs but her friend was always on the way, couldn't do much in terms of escalation. We tried to number close her but her friend came in the way. I ended up with the number of the other girl. Good news is, they're coming to Paris and stay until the 6th, I'll see if I can do something... but I'll still have the friend cock blocking me.

We joined some friends to go to a club for New Year's Eve. We entered around 11pm. As I got into the first room of the club, I noticed that a guy who came with us was taking a picture with three German girls. I offered to take the picture and then took his place in the group of German. I threw a bait in the water and one of them was seriously biting in it... she kissed me on the cheek. This German Brunette was giving me a GREEN light. We spoke a bit, started to flirt with her and put my hands on her body. Started to speak a bit of German with her, told her I liked her lips and started to make out with her. She offered me tequila, I fooled around and told her she should be careful I could become pretty wild after some Tequila shots... She smiled... another permission to go further. At some point, I told her I was getting bored dancing that much. I actually wanted to isolate her a bit to go push it further. She actually refused to stop dancing and challenged me "come dance or you won't see me again"... I didn't want to play this Game and give my power away so I waited a bit against a wall and went to pee and lose sight of her, kind of purposefully I admit, she wasn't that great.

Funny thing is, there was a Pong game in the club. I played some games with my friends and opened a German Blond while she was playing. My hook was pretty simple: "I'll take the winner"... got her name by telling her that I was rooting for her. I put my hands on her shoulder to support her. She stopped playing and we started to speak... She was young but typical German, blond with blue eyes... studying neurology (actually that's a huge demonstration of value for me). As our conversation was progressing, she started to throw some shit tests at me... which was a good sign but she was definitely a YELLOW. At some point she told us she was going to dance with her friend. Since I promised my friend a Pong game, told her I would see her later.

I then joined other friends and started to dance with them. They were all French, I've started to dance with some girls and have fun with my friend. At some point I see one of the girls who were with us starting to kiss another one... I confess that turned me on... Five minutes later I was dancing with that tall French Brunette and escalating... I ended up making out with her and putting my hand all over her... She had a piercing on her belly. At some point she left with her friend... I didn't try to get her to stay.

I found the German Brunette in another room of the club and started to make out again with her, I managed to isolate her and sit in a corner of the room. She was already putting her hands on my crouch, I looked at her right in the eyes and told her she should be careful I might want to do the same thing. She couldn't handle the pressure, she get up and invited me to dance... I was a bit tired of dancing, it was boring and she actually disappeared on me... which was pretty funny... I went back to my friends and danced again with French Brunette and well... made out again with her. At some point we stopped kissing and she looked at me with a huge smile... she actually look pretty drunk which I didn't really notice before since I haven't spoken with her at all. I looked at her pretty serious "are you okay?", she was smiling I didn't really respond to that, maybe that was a bit asshol-ish from me but well. I spent some time trying to find my friend and went back to the hotel. I had to wake up early the next day to catch my plane.

Day 4.
I went back to work the very next day with a few cold sores on my lips... The German Brunette went a bit hard on me, biting my lips and all... Anyways, nothing much to say about this day except that I received a message from the Brazilian girls I've met:

"Daniel, Brazilian Brunette asked me to ask you how was the club yesterday. And, pleased to send a kiss to you and [my friend]. It was great meeting you guys. See ya."

Nice IOIs here. They're coming to Paris after Berlin.

Day 5: night out with Brazilian girls.
The Brazilian girls wanted to do something in Paris with me, so we planned on meeting to get some drinks. I made sure to chose a place where music was playing to make sure I would be able to easily escalate if things went well. I went to the doctor the very same morning to show him the cold sores. It was getting better but wanted to make sure I'd get rid of it for the night. Thing is, he told me I shouldn't kiss anyone on the lips until it's over. That sucked... but at least the cold sores were not visible anymore, my lips were almost back to normal.

We met around 9pm. I was with a friend of mine who rapidly took care of the other girl. I had Brazilian Brunette for myself. I escalated as quick as possible, touching her a lot, comparing our skin tones (she has an amazing tan), comparing the size of our hands... hugging her from time to time but also teasing her about various things. I number closed her and told her we should stay in contact once she got back in Brazil. At some point I asked her where she would take me if I come to São Paulo. I tried to put a bit of pressure on her by complimenting her but she couldn't hear me well so it kind of died in the egg. I took the lead though and lead everyone to the dance floor...

That's where I hit a plateau... The four of us were dancing but I hesitated too much to take her hand and start to dance with her... I started to be in my head and ask myself stupid questions such as "what is my friend going to do" blah blah... That was pretty lame actually. Told them we should take a break from dancing, we spoke a little but they had to go. I said good bye to her friend and hugged her. "I wish I had more time to know you" I said looking right in her eyes. I laid a kiss on her right cheek and hugged her even closer. She looked at me with a smile and kissed my cheek too. As we part from our hug, I put my hand on her chin and looked right in her beautiful eyes. Her mother was Brazilian, her father was Japanese. What a wonderful combination.
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Results.
Made out with two girls, met an gorgeous Brazilian girl.

Thoughts.
That was a good pre-week to start my journal. I confess I'm not really proud of what happened in New Year's Eve... I just ended up kissing two girl without even knowing their names... That's not me actually, I like to meet people, speak with them, get to know their story... but to be honest I was more into practicing Game and putting my new-found motivation into action. I throw a bait and hooked two girls, that's pretty much it. As far as the Tanned Brazilian is concerned, I wasn't on my A-level Game that night but still managed to get something out a the situation. I'm starting to have a lot of assets in Brasil... I should go back there at some point.

To be remembered.
- Whatever the voice in your mind says, whatever the spot you are, some girls are into you.
- Drop a hook, if she bites escalate quickly.
- Avoid the escalation plateau!
- Be more aggressive, state your intent, put pressure on her, you'll know if she a green or a red quickly this way.

_________________
On the Road to Manhood, my new learning journal: http://bit.ly/TEVapM
(My old learning journal http://bit.ly/eYRWL4)

Week #1.
A Quiet Week.

Context.
This week was pretty quiet. I still had cold sores I got from being kissed like by the German and that kind of slowed me down. I also had a lot of work to do for Thursday since I had to present a document in front of 20 to 30 people.

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Day 1, 2 & 3.
Nothing much happened, I was sick and focused on work for the big day. It was "OK" days, I stayed spontaneous and still spoke to some people on public transportation... It wasn't real conversations though.

Day 4.
Presentation day. It was the first time I've actually presented something in front of so much people. I did good, most of the audience was actually pretty impressed by the document I've crafted. I spoke for more than 4 hours... I felt pretty good about it, it's pretty nice to be the one having authority in the room. The good news is I wasn't sick anymore. I went home pretty late because of a convention my company organized...

Day 5.
I did the same presentation in front an even larger crowd the very next day. I met a ton of people, speak to a lot of news guys in the company I'm currently working for. People even quoted me in the enterprise social network. That was pretty nice. I was pretty tired though... I received a nice messages from Brazilian Brunette:

"Hi Daniel, how was your week? I'm leaving tonight, I don't wanna do that... Well I hope someday I'll come back to Paris on the Summer and enjoy all the gardens, parks and the Seine. Kisses and take care Oh find me on Facebook. Kisses"

This woman was gorgeous... It's crazy how much higher my "success" rate is with Brazilian girls... I really have to go back to Brazil... Just in Paris, I've met three Brazilian girls who are into me, all wanting me to pay a visit to them in São Paulo...

Day 6.
Finally did it. I subscribed to my local gym. It's the first time of my life I actually join such a thing. I went shopping in the afternoon in order to find a pair of sweater pants for my working out sessions. I also bought a new shirt and had a pretty nice interaction with the girl in the store. I was really exhausted though so I didn't make any plan for the night so I stayed home, went to sleep early to be ready for my first gym session.

Day 7.
Went to the gym n the morning. I stayed about 1 hour. All the equipment is new and I realized it's actually a pretty nice way to meet new people... I'm starting to like that. On the working out side, I didn't do much for now. I focused on high intensity training since I only have time to do a session once per week. Did leg press, chest press, seated row... and worked on my abs... I worked on all the body and will rest for at least one week until I do it again.

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Results.
Well nothing much, I basically subscribed to my local gym, that's pretty much it. I'm planning to do better next week.

Thoughts.
I focused on work too much this week but I really wanted to take the opportunity of that presentation to actually show what I'm capable of doing. Next week should be light in terms of working load. I'm not sick anymore so I'll do my best to actually have some Game related action.

Mood/Self-Satisfaction Tracker.
As I wrote in my previous post, I want to track my mood on a daily basis (from -3 to 3). The best way to tackle inner game is to actually understand what's bringing me down, and what's make me confident.

_________________
On the Road to Manhood, my new learning journal: http://bit.ly/TEVapM
(My old learning journal http://bit.ly/eYRWL4)

This is not coincidence. I have deep Brazilian roots: one of my best friends is from SP and he has a huge social circle of Brazilians in my old city. Another one of my friends has spent probably a third of his post-college life living in Rio, where I visited. Between those two outlets, I've been with maybe a dozen Brazilian girls.

Brasilieras, more than any other girl I've met, have good "game." And I don't mean that in the way that we say "Club girls have good game, they'll take you for everything you are worth." I mean that in that they know how to treat a man, they enjoy the process of courtship, and they subscribe to a certain, non-Western/non-feminist mentality where there is no shame in letting a man know they are like him, that they want him, and that they need a man. Its a breath of fresh air.

Add to that equation that they tend to put a certain status on being from the Anglosphere and they admire Western culture and its a pretty good bet for Western men to have better success "rates." Finally, I don't know what your complexion is, but blond hair/blue eyes, which I have, sends it over the top. They have a strong attraction to that, I assume simply because its rare through most of the country.

This is interesting. I'm curious to see if this has positive effects for you. Awareness is, of course, a prerequisite for making improvements. But the action must still be taken on the back-end. Don't forget that.

@Daniel Balboa.

I've lived in Brazil and indeed, things are way different there... There's something about girls there, I share your analysis.

This idea of the Mood/Self-Satisfaction Tracking system is to be more constant... to spot what makes me feel good/awesome and what makes me suck. I'm feeling pretty good right now, I'm being constant. Now you're right, this has to lead to actions. I read what you wrote on habits in your journal, I'm not there for now but that's definitely where I want to be.

_________________
On the Road to Manhood, my new learning journal: http://bit.ly/TEVapM
(My old learning journal http://bit.ly/eYRWL4)

Week #2.
Making out with an American tourist.

Context.
I was sick last week, I had the worse toothache I've ever had. As a consequence, nothing much happened last week, so I didn't bother writing anything. The good news is, I felt way better this week and had the opportunity to go out.
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Day 1, 2 & 3.
Nothing much happened during most of the week since the only place where I can meet girls is during my 1h30 morning commute... The company I'm currently working for employs 40+ year old Tried to get enough sleep, do what I had to do... basically keeping control of my life. Found some time to go to the dentist for my toothache... I have to have one of my wisdom tooth removed. On the positive side, I don't have any caries at all... which was a good news considering I haven't been to the dentist in years.

On a Game-related note, I'm keeping contact with Brazilian Brunette, the girl I've met in Berlin. She's gorgeous, half Brazilian, half Japanese... I wish I had more time to get intimate with her. She keeps telling me I should come back to São Paulo and visit her.

Day 4.
Finally got off of my routine. I had dinner with one of my friends and ended up in a classy bar of a 5 star hotel in Paris. I paid about 20€ for my cocktail but I really enjoyed the spot. Everybody was suit up, classy as hell. That the kind of place I'd like to meet/bring a girl. It was pretty empty though.

Day 5.
Nothing much happened during that day.

Day 6: making out with an American tourist.
Went out with some friends Saturday night, I made sure to be in state, I wanted to have fun above all. We got a beer and some shots in a first bar and went to a second one with a dance floor. The night was promising, there were a lot of interesting sets. One set caught my eye, three girls speaking a Nordic/Germanic language, maybe Dutch or German. That was a perfect set, they were three, we were three, I just had to open. I didn't though. I don't have any valid reason not to... but by the time I pick myself up... the opportunity was gone. I was not satisfied with myself.

We started to dance and have fun in the middle of the dance floor. I'm still having a lot of difficulties approaching on a dancing environment. Guess I'm more of a talk guy. I was still having fun though. At some point, an American guy came to me for whatever reason. We start to speak and I realize he came with some girls. I dropped a hook: "are you guys American too?"... One of them replied quickly, "yes I am, what about you". That was a green light for me. I made her guess, thought I was Italian... told her I was French. Got her name, shook her hand and kept it: "Let's dance a little". Here I was dancing with her, asking her what French sentences she knew... one of them was "Voulez-vous coucher avec moi ce soir"... Haha. Told her it turned me on and kissed her. We made out and danced for a while. At some point, I made her turn her back to me and she started to dance the "American" way... pressing her butt against my crouch. Girls don't usually do that in France. Started to escalate even harder... putting my thumbs on her jean and finally part of my hand. I had no resistance whatsoever... Decided to go for it, my fingers were now touching the spot where her lips converge... that's when she grabbed my hands and slowed me down.

She wanted to take a break from dancing, she grabbed my hand and we ended up in a corner of the bar. Isolation: check. We start to speak a little and I realized I was pretty clumsy though. Guess I was rusty. She started to ask me funny facts about me which put me in place I don't like: she's the one who's supposed to be qualifying herself to me. I awkwardly answered her question and got her on another subject... I started to make my usual moves... Spoke about the difference between the American and the French ways of kissing... asked her if American girls usually bite lips... Told her I liked that. She complied and started to bite me every time she kissed me. "Now you're turning me on"... "I want you"... "I know" she said... I was a bit surprised by the answer I confess. She was really sarcastic, I didn't like that. I had the usual shit test: "I guess it's your regular Saturday night, picking-up chicks in clubs" and then "are you by yourself here?"... I sucked at replying o this shit.

Her friends came to us, they were leaving in two minutes. I had to act quick. Asked her where she was staying and told her "let's spend the night together, I'll take you back to your hotel"... Now to be fair, I don't have any spot in Paris, so I had to find an hotel, in the middle of the night in one of the most visited city in the world... Logistics were not on my side and she quickly understood it. She kept shit testing me about being a player... that brought me to a point where I was actually trying to convinced her to spend the night with me. I quickly realized I wasn't in the right frame. I started to let it go. I didn't see what I could do anyway. She was really sarcastic so before leaving she told me "you're not even asking for my name on Facebook"... to be honest I didn't care at all, it's not like she was important to me whatsoever. She wasn't worth the all number-close and stay in touch like the Brasilian Brunette deserved... I challenged her: "is this your way or actually asking me to add you?"... I gave her my name but don't think I'll actually add her.

Day 7.
I got home around 4 am, I was dead tired this morning. I spend the day getting organized for the next week.

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Results.
Made out with an American girl I didn't really connect with... Still good for practice.

Thoughts.
I'm happy about getting back in the Game and having an opportunity to practice, but making out with a girl I don't even connect with is not really what I'm looking for in the end. I'd like to get to know a girl and have the opportunity to spend time with her. Approaching really has to become a second nature, something I naturally do in my daily life... the issue is... I don't have a lot of opportunities to meet girls outside of parties and travels. I need to think about that. I really would like to have more phone numbers in the pipe... Most girls I have in my contacts are not even in France...

To be remembered.
- Shit test: be prepared.
- Whatever the voice in your mind says, whatever the spot you are, some girls are into you.
- Drop a hook, if she bites escalate quickly.
- Avoid the escalation plateau!
- Be more aggressive, state your intent, put pressure on her, you'll know if she a green or a red quickly this way.


Yes, we’re men. Men is what we are.

_________________
On the Road to Manhood, my new learning journal: http://bit.ly/TEVapM
(My old learning journal http://bit.ly/eYRWL4)

Logistics aside, you had this girl.

A few comments:

--When she replied "I know" you need to take a step forward, not back. This is the first thing that comes to mind for me: She says "I know" and I lean in, roughly (but not painfully) grab the hair at the back of her head, tilt her head back, and get into her ear, and slow, smooth, and a little deeply say "And I know that just thinking about it is getting you really turned on too." I might even pause, evaluate her response and say "...bad girl." From there I'd could bite her ear, come back around and let my lips hang right in front of hers, or even push her away and say something like "OK, that's enough for now." Escalation is about being stalwart. Don't get derailed.

--American girls are all about the teasing and sarcasm and verbal sparring matches. I dislike it but its a fact of life.

--To her comments about being by yourself and picking up chicks. I think a simple "Yep" would be an effective answer to both. And then just move on.

--Your closing move shouldn't have been so straightforward "Let's spend the night together." It spells it out too directly. You could have either tried to escalate and gotten her super turned on and then said something like "You can't go now, I'm just starting to enjoy myself" while really physically toying with her, similar to how I described above. Or you could have just said something like "Let your friends go. I'll make sure you get home safely." Maybe even say that to the friends. In the worst case, walk out with them, linger behind with your girl, and then make a "move" by grabbing her hand and pulling her into another bar or in the opposite direction when no one is watching. Just grab her and go and tell her everything will be OK.

Doesn't seem like you cared too much about this particular girl, but hopefully some of this will help if you have a real keeper on your hands.

I've enjoyed reading your jornal, especially because I'm Brazilian and guess what? From São Paulo too! Hahahaha, very nice!