Author Message
 Post subject: Just BE awesome.
PostPosted: Mon Apr 09, 2012 5:08 am 
Offline
Member of MPUA Forum

Joined: Sun Jul 25, 2010 8:52 pm
Posts: 131
This has absolutely nothing to do with How I Met Your Mother...

I think most guys have the wrong mindset.. If you disagree... you disagree that's your opinion.

I don't like calling it sarging... it sounds like an activity... It shouldn't be what you do, it should be what you are(I didn't come up with that line...I think,but it just popped up right now)

Most people don't "get it" It's not about thinking I have to be social and merge groups so they can see I'm social and so they make friends and I can have high value...It is about already having done that and thinking Fuck... I can't remember how that happened... Showing you have high value, isn't the same as actually having high value. Being social isn't thinking you have to talk to everybody in the bar/work etc. It means you have just talked to everybody without thinking about it and making it a big deal.

In the end all game is natural...

I am not talking about methods here. Screw methods there's a million fucking methods. And all of them have merit. Chief's method works perfectly...for Chief. Stelar's method is insane...for Stelar. When you develop your method and incorporate and master it... I'm sure it will be awesome...For you, your best friend who you are busy teaching...Not so much.

"Be yourself... Be your best self" -RSD.. Don't be different when you go out and get woman than how you are at home. It isn't something you turn on and off... It is just something you are. Yes improve yourself. Work on yourself constantly make yourself more attractive.. But going out as someone else each night means you have to work on improving 2 people... "Just work on yourself, and then be that one person you have spent so much time working on"(Fuck that sounds poetic)

This is the inspiration for my post.
A girl was standing behind me in line at the coffee shop. Before I knew it we sat together and had coffee. I never thought of opening. I never thought of picking her up and running day game... I remeber I was in line... and the next thing I knew I had coffee with her. I didn't think about closing or anything. I didn't turn on pickup mode. I was myself... myself is a social guy. I just start talking to people and making friends without thinking about it. At that moment the thought I had was... damn standing in a line alone is boring.So hey how are you doing? It wasn't about closing. I didn't think okay be social I just AM social.

Now this applies to be everything not just "being social". If you watched fight club. You'll know Brad Pitt is alpha in the movie... He isn't only alpha on Saturdays, Mondays and some Fridays... He is always alpha. That is who he is.

I KNOW A LOT OF PEOPLE TAKE STUFF TOO LITERALLY... SO I TOOK THE LIBERTY OF WRITING IN CAPS FOR EMPHASIS. USE COMMON SENSE WHEN YOU READ WHAT I JUST WROTE.- don't go telling everyone you want to fuck them because that's who you are!! Learn CALIBRATION! Although if you want to do that... try it. But I haven't done it so I can't say.

I know this post isn't teaching you how to just BE. But having the right mindset is a great step.

It is like martial arts... The more you train to dodge a punch. When you get punched... you just naturally dodge.. In pickup, we all know the moves, the tricks, the gambits, the body language, the escalation techniques... We just don't naturally do it..

And since ranting is the new thing on this forum... Rant on.


Top
   
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Mon Apr 09, 2012 11:14 am 
Offline
Dedicated Member

Joined: Wed Nov 16, 2011 12:44 am
Posts: 734
I do agree on the basic level. The problem comes with the point you make at the end - how do you become true to yourself? People have all sorts of social pressures and concepts in their head that stop them from being how you say. It's not always as easy as just saying "get over it". Sometimes people need a nudge in the right direction, and some advice on how to get to that stage.

Personally, I never really went in for the methods at the start. I spent most of my time on the natural game/social anxiety forums, I did things similar to the "Newbie Challenge" and that helps you get to a point where you can become yourself. Others might like to use the methods and whatever to help them get used to talking to women and opening etc. Sometimes having that canned material can take the pressure off you.

Again, you make the point that different things work for different people. I'm in the same boat as you - I think that, certainly for me, if you're going to use routines and canned stuff, the ideal is to use it but adapt it to your own personal style and your situation at the time. The biggest ideal, for me, though is to be as you say and just get in that frame of mind where you're not using material, you're just being talkative. Other people though will have loads of success sticking rigidly to canned material. If all they want is to get laid, and the canned material is working fine for them, why do they need to bother about the other stuff? It's all down to personal preference.


Top
   
 Post subject: Re: Just BE awesome.
PostPosted: Mon Apr 09, 2012 8:07 pm 
Offline
PUA Forum Leader
User avatar

Joined: Sun Mar 22, 2009 4:38 pm
Posts: 1430
Quote:
I don't like calling it sarging... it sounds like an activity... It shouldn't be what you do, it should be what you are
What you are is something that you must first become. How do you become something you do not practice for? Think of all the people scared to ask a woman on the street what time it is, or where the nearest Wall Mart is. Do you suggest they sit at home and just "become" awesome? Or stand in front of the mirror and try convincing themselves out loud that they are awesome?
Quote:
Most people don't "get it" It's not about thinking I have to be social and merge groups so they can see I'm social and so they make friends and I can have high value...It is about already having done that and thinking Fuck... I can't remember how that happened...
Again, a point that has to be reached. And again, no situation you can be a part of unless you practiced for it with as much experience as you need to get there.
Quote:
In the end all game is natural...
Of course. There's no such thing as "unnatural" game unless you knock her unconscious with chloroform and call it 'isolation'.
Quote:
I know this post isn't teaching you how to just BE. But having the right mindset is a great step.
Here's the core of the whole thing. Having the right mindset will make all the difference in the outcome of your game, yes.

But this only applies to internalized mindsets, rather than delusional ones. And the difference being that internalized mindsets are mindsets which you are CONVINCED of works and truly BELIEVE in, whereas delusional mindsets are mindsets which you are attempting to internalize, but your subconscious continuously convinces you they are bullshit, because you got no grounds of experience that support that mindset.

This leads to the main point, which is that internalized mindsets can only be achieved through actual experience. There is no 'one' path to success.

As good as the point that you're trying to make is - finding 'yourself' and succeeding is not as simple as just 'being' the person you'd want to be.

This is why I believe it's actually healthy for people to first experiment with different ways of picking up until they internalize the mindsets necessary to just "be awesome" and reach the point of success they always wanted.


Top
   
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Mon Apr 09, 2012 8:56 pm 
Offline
Member of MPUA Forum

Joined: Sun Jul 25, 2010 8:52 pm
Posts: 131
I agree with all your points... And I know I do not explain how to be like this. It was just a sudden realization that cleared up for me and I wanted to share it. What I did is that I surrounded myself with other guys who are doing well with life in general, I became more like them so I got better myself and this just who I am. I know I don't explain how to do it. I don't consider myself to know everything and to share it because I think is right, this is more a example of my end goal in game. I am not picking up woman left and right by any means. I just noticed that I make a lot of friends without trying at the moment and this is how I realized it.


Top
   
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Mon Apr 09, 2012 9:27 pm 
Offline
PUA Forum Leader
User avatar

Joined: Sun Mar 22, 2009 4:38 pm
Posts: 1430
Quote:
What I did is that I surrounded myself with other guys who are doing well with life in general, I became more like them so I got better myself and this just who I am.
I completely relate to this, I did the exact same thing. By only hanging out with these kinds of guys, incredibly much in my life improved.

I think variation in friends and people you get to know is one of the strongest ways to broaden your horizons and evolve as a person.

Back in the day, I strongly believed in solo-sarging. I used to go out a lot, thinking that I'll improve the best if I got no friends to disturb my way of thinking or slow me down.

I then realized that if you want to be good at something - the best choice is involving yourself with the kind of people that are already good at it.

Your mind will automatically start picking up on these qualities and you will subconsciously evolve at a much quicker rate.


Top
   
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Mon Apr 09, 2012 10:01 pm 
Offline
MPUA Forum Enthusiast

Joined: Thu Apr 05, 2012 9:07 pm
Posts: 88
Quote:
Quote:
What I did is that I surrounded myself with other guys who are doing well with life in general, I became more like them so I got better myself and this just who I am.
I completely relate to this, I did the exact same thing. By only hanging out with these kinds of guys, incredibly much in my life improved.

I think variation in friends and people you get to know is one of the strongest ways to broaden your horizons and evolve as a person.

Back in the day, I strongly believed in solo-sarging. I used to go out a lot, thinking that I'll improve the best if I got no friends to disturb my way of thinking or slow me down.

I then realized that if you want to be good at something - the best choice is involving yourself with the kind of people that are already good at it.

Your mind will automatically start picking up on these qualities and you will subconsciously evolve at a much quicker rate.
This is key. ^^

Despite what people might believe, you can't get rid of Social pressures. Even the label "Pua" and this forum is a social pressure.

What you can do is use social pressures to your advantage.

Birds of a feather flock together for a reason, finding positive healthy cultures to associate and identify with will pressure you into progressing.

Psychologically it's much easier to study if all your friends are at home studying rather than sitting on the couch getting baked and it's easier to run one more lap if everyone else is doing it. You can't escape social pressure, but you can certainly use it as a powerful tool.

One of the great things pua does is give people an identity and community that encourages progress through the aspirational idea of being a "PUA". That alone has probably helped countless individuals make massive leaps in their romantic lives.


Top
   
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Tue Apr 10, 2012 4:49 pm 
Offline
New to MPUA Forum

Joined: Tue Apr 10, 2012 8:22 am
Posts: 4
In my first post on this website I titled it Accidentally a PUA.?.? I was drawn into this simply by the title. I totally agree with the Just be Awesome approach. Uncommon differences are what get people to notice/look at you. It may be a negative difference such as having one leg, but the same rules apply when you have something polar opposite of that. A good, attractive difference. Whether it be something PUAs do differently from the random guy on steroids or a genuinely interesting person, if you are able to "Just be Awesome" then by all means drop the corny pick up lines, and do something in public that will draw positive attention. It's far easier to continue doing something you're already naturally good at as opposed to studying someone else's moves and trying to apply them. My version of "just being awesome" never registered to me how many people notice a positive difference in my than everyone else. I've had other males say things to me like "Damn Andrew you're like the ring leader of everything." or females staring me in the face saying "I just can't figure you out." Had I known at the time that these were major IOIs and proof of being an AMOG/Alpha male of most places I go, I would have such a better number. Countless times have things like this and even more so an IOI happened to me long before I read my first PUA book/forum/website etc. This ties into my Accidentally a PUA.?.? thread and proves that just being awesome is definetly a great opener.


Top
   
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Tue Apr 10, 2012 5:46 pm 
Offline
Member of MPUA Forum

Joined: Fri Jun 17, 2011 7:21 pm
Posts: 108
Location: Norway
I totally agree with you on this one DDRQ.

In fact, what I've noticed is that by not analyzing, not worrying and just being cocky and "in love with myself" I get way better response with girls.

With my ex-GF I used to joke all the time about how awesome I am, and how my awesomeness was the reason the sun goes up in the morning and down in the evening, how women used to take pilgrimages to my apartment to experience my awsome dick etc.
She loved it and we laughed a lot about it. Five minutes ago I did the same stuff with the girl I'm going out with on Thursday, and she loved it.

I also hooked up a date with another chick for this weekend by simply going "all out" with flexing my muscles, acting like the coolest guy in the world, driving my BMW at insane speed down the highway and being all casual about it. Me and my wingman will escalate this, by him asking me stuff about my training so I can brag about bench pressing a freakin' minivan and stuff like that. Any girl with half a brain must understand that this is something we do on purpose to help each other look awesome, but as long as we're telling the truth they just don't care.
Girls want guys with ripped bodies, cool jobs, fast cars, and sucsessful friends. They want us to take them on kick ass vacations to exotic places and screw their brains out. So why not be that guy, instead of being humble? :)

Just mix it up with some self-irony and do it on a cocky funny way.
For example the girl I talked with right now mentioned how some girls wear high heels because they have complexes about their height. I told her that it makes no sense focusing on stuff you can't change, just do the best with the hand your dealt. "For example, I can complain all I want about my dick being too huge, but I just stick in my sock so I don't step on it and move on with my life, you know."
I know it's a lame joke, but if you present it with a laid back confident attittude and a sly smile, girls will perceive you as an alpha anyway and be delighted to hang out with such an awesome and cool guy. As they damn well should be - I rule!! :)

It should be mentioned that not all girls are the same. I'm also screwing this gorgeous little 18 year old blonde girl who has a slim body, but big natural teenage boobs and a firm juicy ass. She is very shy at heart, and just wants to be a mother and housewife some day. By that I mean that she really wants this - unlike any other teenage girl I've ever met.
With her I have to be more "beta" in my behaviour. Sure I'm confident and flirt a lot with her in a sexual way, but I don't brag and pound my chest around her. Instead I try to come across as the serious, kind and caring guy. The one who could nail all her friends if he wanted, but who just wants to cuddle with her and go shopping for a new sofa at IKEA because it's so very delightful.

Fair enough, I'll just go IKEA shopping with an attitude! :lol:
It's not too hard to walk around there like I'm the king of the world when I walk hand in hand with a gorgeous teenage girl, while looking at all the AFCs who are my own age (in their 30s) who are there with girls they obviously settled for.
I'll be sending them looks saying "I just know you'll be fantasizing about my girl when you nail your pear shaped wife tonight. I don't have to fantasize though, because I'm the alpha dog, the motherf...king and you can bet your out-of-shape pale ass that I've got plenty more girls like this in my phone book to choose from! Oh, yeah!" :D


Top
   
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Tue Apr 10, 2012 9:54 pm 
Offline
Member of MPUA Forum

Joined: Sun Jul 25, 2010 8:52 pm
Posts: 131
The above post is a good example. Buy not trying to analyzing everything you start to auto analyze it.

What I mean by this I will take your example of the two girls, with one you are very cocky and funny and she loves it, which works, the other one that you are beta with you analyzed her without really knowing it and instantly became the guy she wants without spending days trying to figure her out. This in my opinion is key to being successful. Adapting to your situation instantly without mind fucking yourself.

And the 3 rules from the movie Tao of Steve which came out long ago but is very accurate in my opinion.
1. Be desireless (Don't be desperate)
2. Be awesome (Stand out in a good way)
3. Be gone (Be scarce and have other stuff that also keeps you busy so she knows your not alway available)

And girls respond well to "fake" ego... By this I mean you joking about how awesome you are, this tells her that you have confidence and think highly of yourself while being funny, but you're also not just an arrogant prick who's all talk and no action.


Top
   
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Tue Apr 10, 2012 10:39 pm 
Offline
Member of MPUA Forum

Joined: Fri Jun 17, 2011 7:21 pm
Posts: 108
Location: Norway
Quote:
The above post is a good example. Buy not trying to analyzing everything you start to auto analyze it.

What I mean by this I will take your example of the two girls, with one you are very cocky and funny and she loves it, which works, the other one that you are beta with you analyzed her without really knowing it and instantly became the guy she wants without spending days trying to figure her out. This in my opinion is key to being successful. Adapting to your situation instantly without mind fucking yourself.

And the 3 rules from the movie Tao of Steve which came out long ago but is very accurate in my opinion.
1. Be desireless (Don't be desperate)
2. Be awesome (Stand out in a good way)
3. Be gone (Be scarce and have other stuff that also keeps you busy so she knows your not alway available)

And girls respond well to "fake" ego... By this I mean you joking about how awesome you are, this tells her that you have confidence and think highly of yourself while being funny, but you're also not just an arrogant prick who's all talk and no action.
Yeah, what he said! :D


Top
   
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Wed Apr 11, 2012 2:39 pm 
Offline
PUA Forum Leader
User avatar

Joined: Mon Mar 26, 2012 9:42 pm
Posts: 1251
DDRQ.... Spot on my man!

How I Met Your Mother, Two and a Half Men.... Charlie and Barney are the stereotypical guys the media want oyu to love/loathe. But - any PUA sees 'amatuer hour' in them...


It's funny you talk about 'being awesome'. I do the same. I had a chick tell me she was the queen of everything... I told her she was wrong, that until I, the Dean of Awesome fromthe University of Aweome, GAVE her that title, she was just the "queen of a lot of shit".

She asked where the University of Awesome was located - I said it's all around you, right here, right now.... Then she asked HOW to get that endorsement... (Hook point).

If game is work - it's not GOING to work as well as it could. If game is part of your personality now, if it's become whom you are... it works effortlessly!

_________________
Women are like ceramic tile.... if you do the prep work, and lay them properly the first time...you can walk all over them for years to come.


Top
   
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Wed Apr 11, 2012 4:00 pm 
Offline
Member of MPUA Forum

Joined: Sun Jul 25, 2010 8:52 pm
Posts: 131
Quote:
If game is work - it's not GOING to work as well as it could. If game is part of your personality now, if it's become whom you are... it works effortlessly!
Precisely. I know it takes a lot of work to get to this point, but sometimes you are closer than you think, and game takes you further away with routines and stuff. Once you are here pickingup up woman isn't an activity, it is more of a lifestyle.


Top
   
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Wed Apr 11, 2012 4:19 pm 
Offline
MPUA Forum Enthusiast

Joined: Thu Apr 05, 2012 9:07 pm
Posts: 88
Quote:
Quote:
If game is work - it's not GOING to work as well as it could. If game is part of your personality now, if it's become whom you are... it works effortlessly!
Precisely. I know it takes a lot of work to get to this point, but sometimes you are closer than you think, and game takes you further away with routines and stuff. Once you are here pickingup up woman isn't an activity, it is more of a lifestyle.
Really, that seems to be the opposite of what most people have experience both here and in the exercise of any other social/communicative skill.


Top
   
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Wed Apr 11, 2012 6:07 pm 
Offline
Member of MPUA Forum

Joined: Sun Jul 25, 2010 8:52 pm
Posts: 131
Basically what I mean, was sort of a natural I wasn't by any means great, but I did good considering I knew nothing and I still got a lot of girls in high school.

Until I read game and learned routines and gambits. This took me away from what I was already accustomed to and took me back a step scripting stuff was just unnatural for me.

Of course if you are just to afriad to start a conversation or anything then obviously this helps.

But you see so much results of other guys that do very good and think that you are not good at all even though you already had some girls before this and needed to change a few small stuff. If you already have social skills build on it... Don't use game to learn new stuff from the start. Tweaking stuff that you already know to improve htme is much faster than learning a whole lot of new stuff from the beginning.

And again, if you HAVE NO SOCIAL skills then do game as you don't have a foundation... But when the foundation is there already build on it.


Top
   
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Thu Apr 12, 2012 6:35 pm 
Offline
MPUA Forum Enthusiast

Joined: Thu Apr 05, 2012 9:07 pm
Posts: 88
Quote:
Basically what I mean, was sort of a natural I wasn't by any means great, but I did good considering I knew nothing and I still got a lot of girls in high school.

Until I read game and learned routines and gambits. This took me away from what I was already accustomed to and took me back a step scripting stuff was just unnatural for me.

Of course if you are just to afriad to start a conversation or anything then obviously this helps.

But you see so much results of other guys that do very good and think that you are not good at all even though you already had some girls before this and needed to change a few small stuff. If you already have social skills build on it... Don't use game to learn new stuff from the start. Tweaking stuff that you already know to improve htme is much faster than learning a whole lot of new stuff from the beginning.

And again, if you HAVE NO SOCIAL skills then do game as you don't have a foundation... But when the foundation is there already build on it.
I wouldn't say it is that simple.

"Models" (Like the mystery method or SS or whatever) are rough approximations that can be used, they are not there to represent reality. They are just a handy way of arranging facts/statistic/observations so that people can make sense of them and make efficient choices.

These models work better when people are socially aware and can adapt the model as they go to achieve their ends, these models fail when people with little social experience try and take these models as a template for human inter-action.

Think about the MM guys who can't hold down a girl-friend because they don't understand how to just express their affection to a girl. Or the RSD types who are dominating frames and thinking about how awesome their life is who just end up coming of as obnoxious ass-holes.

^ These guys haven't yet caught on to how real life goes on, so they take these pick up artist visions of life and try and force that onto everyone and everything they meet.

-----

You don't want to be over-analysing.. but then what is the point in being here if you are not going to do at least some sort of analysing.

I think what we are after is some form of awareness of social cues and dynamics without a paralysing sense of paranoia.


Top
   
Display posts from previous:  Sort by  
Post new topic  Reply to topic  [ 20 posts ] 

All times are UTC


You cannot post new topics in this forum
You cannot reply to topics in this forum
You cannot edit your posts in this forum
You cannot delete your posts in this forum
You cannot post attachments in this forum

Search for:
Jump to:  

Can we be honest?

We want your email address. Let me send you the best seduction techniques ever devised... because they are really good.
close-link