How to come over the fear?

theflash · Posted: Mon Mar 10, 2008 6:39 pm Post subject: How to come over the fear?

How the hell is a person supposed to get over the fear of approaching?
I am an shy person and dread rejection. I have tried to approach girls but just dont have the guts. How to start from here??

Wing · Posted: Mon Mar 10, 2008 7:07 pm Post subject:

hey,
i think this is difficult, ´cause no one can make your shyness away, this must happen in Your mind Wink

but, i think there are also some tricks to do better (on which o know Wink

)

1. don´t be afraid that the girl reject you, don´t care. It´s not the end of the world, just think about it, why has she done this? what did i wrong?

2. a very funny trick Very Happy

you know it´s the most times easier to talk to HB (2-5) or kind of these, so if you see an very cute girl, think that she´s "ugly".. with a fat ass or something like that Very Happy

3. Alway think to yourself that no one is perfect, even not the cutest girl in world.If you know this, then you will notice that no we are all be the same, never think that anyperson is better then you (Equal).

hmm i hope this will help you a little bit, also you should read some books, p.e. the game from neil strauss, or How to be a pickup artist from wayne elise (juggler). I´m reading them and they are really helpfull in every view.

p.s.: sry if my english is not the best, i´m coming from germany and i´m still a student, but i hope you can understand what i tried to say Very Happy

Vedere · Posted: Mon Mar 10, 2008 11:06 pm Post subject:

@theflash

Practic : Even the best PUA have Approach anxiety. It's always there. Everybody has it. It's like a pool of cold water. Just jump in it. At first it's scary, but once you're in..

Theory : I listened to Ross Jeffries "Unstoppable confidence" tapes and Susan Jeffers " Feel the fear and do it anyway" + I've read a lot of posts on this forum.

@Wing

Don't apoligize for your English dude, it's OKay ! I think everybody here is able to understand you Wink

theflash · Posted: Tue Mar 11, 2008 7:45 pm Post subject:

Thanks mates for youre advice!

The SAINT · Posted: Tue Mar 11, 2008 8:04 pm Post subject:

Hey how we all doing?

The fear is not your shyness it is of rejection. To get rid of this fear you must attack it head on knowing that just like bungy jumping if you take that leap and push yourself it will be worth it.

All PUAS have the approach anxiety however you minimize it by saying I have been blown out thousands of times and thus I don't
care about the outcome or you become confident enough and say I know I can open with anything the fear is still there but your confidence or struggle for success must push you.

Question > If fear stopped your Mom dad sibling or friend from achieving their goals what advice would you give them?

Step up and go after the challenge.

ChowforNow,

the--------------------------------------->Saint

"Whether or not you agree with his harsh, straight to the point mentality, truth be told, he’s the most active/ dedicated / motivating member on this board. He’s routinely getting newbies and current members out sarging, pushing them into sets, given them suggestions and advice, replying to posts more often then anyone else. (Come out Wednesdays and you’ll see what I mean). Also, I have not once heard him making excuses about not going out and pussying out. If anyone else can show me this, I will automatically promote you to any status that you want on this board. (including admin).

Now .. I (and others) .. have tried a more sugar coated / feel good approach to getting guys to come out. Truth be told, it hasn’t worked anywhere close as well. I'm dissappointed that with all the free resources, and the cool guys that we have offering free advice, so few people actually make use of it, go out consistantly, and get better with women, instead of dabbling and keyboard jockeying."

"How did it start?Well, I dont know.I just feel the craving.I see the flesh and it smells fresh.And it's just there for the taking."

"Looking at my own reflection When suddenly it changes Violently it changes Oh no there is no turning back now You've woken up the demon in me"

"Only see, somehow it always seems that I'm learnin' or something I can never be It dosen't matter to me, 'cause I will always be that pimp I see
in all my fantasies I don't know your fucking name.So what?
Let's.fuck"

"Scrutinize every word, memorize every line
I spit it once, refuel, reenergize, and rewind
I give sight to the blind, mind sight through the mind

kinoescalator · Posted: Wed Mar 12, 2008 7:32 am Post subject:

Very easy to get over.

Just remember this and u will be fine.

They are JUST GIRLS. The hot ones are nothing special, its all an act they put on to DHV themselves. They are just like little girls, its so silly its funny.....

U r the man....a hot girl is just a little girl puttting on a "act" to look good.

Dont open girls and be single forever. Thats scarey.

Keep telling yourself those things, and u will feel a lot better for opening.

Juice24 · Posted: Wed Mar 12, 2008 7:41 am Post subject:

Yeah, what Kino said!!! Jus need to practice even I go out everyday or so and Open people.. not just girls but guys also. Just get comfortable with talking, I get alot of exercise while Im working in the meat department.

Swink · Posted: Wed Mar 12, 2008 7:46 am Post subject:

agreed, just randomly ask people wherever you are for the time, or where they got something, or about the weather just practicing conversation with random individuals and groups will help dramatically

Jake109 · Posted: Sat Mar 15, 2008 5:15 pm Post subject:

My dad said this to me one day,

If you don't go up and talk to them, who else will?

This is after you've been in the bar staring at the girls for 5 min, kicking yourself for not doing anything.

Your the best thing that ever happened to them.

Think that

Feel that

Be that

You either win or learn.

Good luck man.

sweetw1982 · Posted: Sun Mar 16, 2008 12:40 am Post subject:

I have been working on a technique. I try to approach as many women as i can, at some point the more women i approach, the less the stress will be. A good buddy of mine in the navy once told me that the first time he jumped out of an airplane he pissed himself. he has jumped over 500 flights and is at the point where its just a part of what he does. He is still scared but not nearly as much as his first jump. I guess us average folks can refer it to something more like driving a car. the first time i drove i was scared to death, now i do it without hesitation. I still worry about getting into a car accident, hense the seatbelt, careful driving and car insurance but I am confident enough in my driving to do it.

PUACanada · Posted: Sun Mar 16, 2008 2:12 am Post subject:

Kimstar · Posted: Sun Mar 16, 2008 3:42 am Post subject: Advice for the fear.

Its pritty simple, what i allways think about is, if u fuck it up big time in the start u have to think that u will never see this woman again anyway, so why even care?. the biggest risk u have is that u get kicked by the tribal leader of their group ect. u shouldnt care about the fear of meeting a girl as the chance of you meeting her again if u live in a big city is nearly slim to nothing:).

So my advice, is to keep in mind that why care? u wont see her again anyway.

Bad English couse im from Norway Wink

theflash · Posted: Mon Mar 17, 2008 10:05 am Post subject: Thanks to everybody.

Thanks a lot for youre help. I went out last weekend and just went and talked to girls and by the end of the evening I got a girl to come over to my place. Laughing

here2learn · Posted: Tue Mar 18, 2008 5:57 am Post subject:

Its verrrry hard to get over and sometimes i can get bouts of AA. For me if i can open one set well i am good for the whole night. You open one and you get everything going just right pull out and carry your momentum into the next set. Soon you will feel unstoppable and not thinking twice about opening a set.

Verse · Posted: Wed Mar 26, 2008 6:57 pm Post subject:

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