| Author |
Message |
jojo2178
New to PUA Forum
Joined: 08 Sep 2007
Posts: 4
Reputation: 5  
|
 Posted: Fri Nov 16, 2007 6:35 pm Post subject: Girl convinced I'm a player. Tell her I'm a virgin? |
 |
|
I'm seeing this girl, but she's hesitant about seeing me b/c she thinks I'm a player. She almost didn't want to go out with me tonight b/c of that (and she's seeing another guy). I'm decent looking and pretty confident around girls, so that could be why she thinks that. I've told her I'm not a player, but she doesn't believe me.
Last edited by jojo2178 on Sat Nov 17, 2007 3:18 pm; edited 1 time in total |
|
| Back to top |
|
 |
|
JSmooth
PUA Forum Leader
Joined: 20 Oct 2007
Posts: 2406
Location: Nashville
Reputation: 275
votes: 25
|
| Posted: Fri Nov 16, 2007 7:55 pm Post subject: Hey |
|
|
Either she believe you or she doesn't. A PUA doesn't care what she thinks, it doesn't matter, there are more fish in the sea and all that stuff. You justifying this "I'm not a player" thing to her is too much AFC type of behaviour.
J SMOOTH |
|
| Back to top |
|
|
jp23
New to PUA Forum
Joined: 14 Nov 2007
Posts: 21
Location: Houston
Reputation: 2.4
|
| Posted: Fri Nov 16, 2007 7:57 pm Post subject: |
|
|
| Personally I think if you go out tonight, if the subjects come up work your way into it. So what makes you think I'm a player? If she brings up instances, explain your side of the story. Then if she still isn't convinced maybe say something along the lines of "well you know I've never slept with anyone before" but make it look because of standards that you. Be confident and proud of it when you tell her. Just my opinion |
|
| Back to top |
|
|
Arkitekt
Member of PUA Forum
Joined: 07 Oct 2007
Posts: 157
Location: Charlotte, NC
Reputation: 28.7
votes: 2
|
| Posted: Fri Nov 16, 2007 8:13 pm Post subject: |
|
|
I wouldn't tell her you're a virgin.
Whether it is the truth or not, it seems to me that you are still trying to
trick her into believing you are not a player with that.
She can believe what she wants to believe. While she's sitting there
thinking about it, you can go have fun and meet more women.  |
|
| Back to top |
|
|
bilbil85
Member of PUA Forum
Joined: 21 Oct 2007
Posts: 117
Location: Massachusetts
Reputation: 42
votes: 4
|
| Posted: Fri Nov 16, 2007 9:03 pm Post subject: Re: Girl convinced I'm a player. Tell her I'm a virgin? |
|
|
| jojo2178 wrote: | I'm seeing this girl, but she's hesitant about seeing me b/c she thinks I'm a player. She almost didn't want to go out with me tonight b/c of that (and she's seeing another guy). I'm decent looking and pretty confident around girls, so that could be why she thinks that. I've told her I'm not a player, but she doesn't believe me.
Should I tell her I'm a V to convince her that I'm not a player?
I'm a 23 y/o virgin and she's 20. I'm afraid I'll scare her away by telling her I'm a V, but at the same time I don't want to lose her b/c she thinks I'm a player. |
Hey jojo, no worries... this is what you tell her. If she brings up the fact that you are a player then say something like this:
Girl: You're a player.
PUA: Let me ask you a question, if you started going out with someone and you realized that wasn't the person for you, would you keep going out with them? I mean you would not only be wasting your time, but also hers. I don't know about you but when I find something or someone I like, I hold onto them with my gator grip, until then... im swimmin with the fishies.
The whole point of this is rationalizing the fact that you date a lot of girls, even if you don't. The best part is it makes perfect sense, and you look like a good guy for not wasting a girls time.
And if she asks you how many girls you've slept with, don't give her a factual answer. Say something like 'Enough to know what im doing." If you are a virgin and you use that line.. props to you because you can play with the likes of eric clapton without ever having picked up a guitar; catch my drift? |
|
| Back to top |
|
|
megasalex
New to PUA Forum
Joined: 04 Nov 2007
Posts: 18
Reputation: 8.7
|
| Posted: Fri Nov 16, 2007 9:24 pm Post subject: |
|
|
"Don't hate the player, hate the game." 
One of my uni mates (female!) mentioned that one when she started dating another guy after breaking up with one of my other friends. Said in the right way, it could work.., |
|
| Back to top |
|
|
|
|
yenwen
PUA Forum Enthusiast
Joined: 21 Sep 2007
Posts: 53
Location: Fullerton CA
Reputation: 10.4
|
| Posted: Fri Nov 16, 2007 9:28 pm Post subject: |
|
|
This doesn't apply to your current situation BUT it's something I use.
Girl "You're a player!"
Me " *smile* *Shrug*" and move on to something else. |
|
| Back to top |
|
|
Ka
PUA Forum Leader
Joined: 13 Oct 2007
Posts: 983
Location: philly
Reputation: 139.6
votes: 15
|
| Posted: Fri Nov 16, 2007 9:44 pm Post subject: |
|
|
I see the oppurtunity here to go extremely C & F.
HER: "Your a player...."
YOU: "Your right, i probably sleep with like 10 chicks a day...you know its really turning into a second job."
Sometimes the best way to deflect someones accusations is to admit it in a extreme light.
I would NOT tell her you are a virgin, that would give her the idea that your trying to pop your cherry. If you make it to bed with her, you can mention it afterwards if you like.
What i would do is go C & F on her the first time or 2 she mentions it, and if she countinues with it...
YOU: "We arent married yet, relax! Im here to have a good time, and enjoy your company. Im not exclusivily yours...yet. However if i were to be dating other women you would know about it, and of course it would be a two way street. Im not saying you cant date others. If we really hit it off then maybe we will only see each other."
Thats about the best i can come up with. I think handleing possible confritation comes in 3 steps progressivly...
-Let something happens that bothers you
-Try to undo it by being C & F about it
-If they dont get the hint be direct and clear, let them know its not acceptable.
IMO most conflicts would be resolved with the C & F, sometimes people are dense and dont get it, then you gotta be strait up with them. I htink this is true for all conflicts.
With this method you dont go fro passive to asshole in a split second, so it seems more natural. So far i have had success using this method for dealing with people who say/do things i dont like.
Hope this helps |
|
| Back to top |
|
|
Lestat
PUA Forum Enthusiast
Joined: 01 Nov 2007
Posts: 88
Location: Scarborough, England or Huddersfield, England
Reputation: 34
|
| Posted: Fri Nov 16, 2007 10:59 pm Post subject: |
|
|
Sorry, you said 'She's seeing another guy'? Unless that was a grammatical error, and you meant she was seeing another guy but isn't now... what room does she have to call you a player?
Otherwise, she broke up with the guy to go out with you, so what room does she have to call you a player? |
|
| Back to top |
|
|
alexandros
Member of PUA Forum
Joined: 26 Sep 2007
Posts: 126
Reputation: 29.1
|
| Posted: Sat Nov 17, 2007 12:35 am Post subject: |
|
|
| i wouldnt tell her that you're virgin, girls dont want a player, and they dont want to train either. |
|
| Back to top |
|
|
|
