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F-closed and girl keeps calling herself a slut. what do i do
 
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NbBurna
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PostPosted: Mon Oct 29, 2007 10:12 am    Post subject: F-closed and girl keeps calling herself a slut. what do i do Reply with quote

basically, i f-closed a girl, and now shes kinda worried and calling herself a slut for doing it. we still talk and stuff and shes not seriously hitting herself for doing it with me, but what should i say to make her feel better about it?
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8ball.uk
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PostPosted: Mon Oct 29, 2007 2:14 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

I try to build ways of dealing with this into my routine. Like, I tend to ask girls if they're impulsive, adventurous, comfortable with themselves etc earlier on in the routine (good way to create a yes-ladder) and you can refer back to this if she starts freaking out. Just say stuff like ''But I thought you said you were impulsive and liked having fun? Why should you feel guilty for doing something you enjoy? The only people who would blame you for that are jealous people who shouldn't matter to you''. You can alway try building another yes ladder when you tell her all this, like; ''Did you enjoy it?'', ''Do you like me?'', ''Do you want to see me again?'' - this should help put her in a positive frame of mind.

Hope that helps, just something thats worked for me in the past Smile
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Trivial
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PostPosted: Mon Oct 29, 2007 5:29 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Have to make her believe sex is not a big deal and is human nature
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Crasher
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PostPosted: Thu Nov 29, 2007 9:12 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

take her on a sympathy date where you just tell her that it is no big deal 8ball had a good point in building a yes ladder
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reloaded
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PostPosted: Fri Dec 07, 2007 12:50 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

I have a similar situation a couple of days ago, i think in reality there are 2 possible causes for this:
1) She really feel like a slut and that she did something wrong
2) She wants to know that you don't think she is.

For both anyway I think the solution is the same, here is what I did.

She: But I think it was too fast bla bla bla..
Me: Well, it just happened, sometimes you just have to live and do as you are feeling, and that's ok.
She: Yes I know, but still it was too fast, deep inside i'm a (nationality) girl
Me: Well, it would be great you could look at yourself with my eyes. For me you are a smart, independent, self-thinking person, and I liked very much being with you
(I added some more about not following her country conservative ideas but that i think you don't need)
She: Really?, Ah i'm happy we have this conversation.

She never came back with this. hope it helps
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caveman
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PostPosted: Tue Dec 11, 2007 12:56 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Trivial wrote:
Have to make her believe sex is not a big deal and is human nature


I agree with Trivial. Everybody has sex. If you have sex all the time with different partners, then you can call yourself a slut.
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Esperanto
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PostPosted: Tue Dec 11, 2007 1:08 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

A slut is a girl who guys use and drop. You are continuing to see this girl. As a result, she's not a slut...she's a girl who acted on excellent chemistry.
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Ka
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PostPosted: Tue Dec 11, 2007 2:35 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

I agree with all the above, nip it quickly before she convinces herself and seperates from you.

They pretty much covered all bases, talk to her, explain to her that its cool...and she wont be bothered with it again unless this is something she does on a regualr basis and shes beating herself up.
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The Wild One
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PostPosted: Tue Dec 11, 2007 3:20 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

If she thinks she has been a slut then you went to fast threw comfort with her, or she is just using at an excuse to not sleep with you again.
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Valence
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PostPosted: Tue Dec 11, 2007 3:33 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

You want to make her feel better about herself? How many times have to re-assured her that she was not? Many times?

I do not know very much about this but I am certain that she is saying what she is to get a reaction out of you.

Stop doing it.

The next time she says it, tell her that she is not and you are not saying it again and you do not want to hear about it.

Walk away if you have to. You are entering down the path of oneitus. Of being used.......
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TrojanMan88
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PostPosted: Wed Jan 02, 2008 6:55 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

keep fucking her and she will get validation from that. Don't give verbal validation to her.
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