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Exile
PUA Forum Enthusiast
Joined: 17 Jun 2008
Posts: 48
Location: UK South West
Reputation: 7.8  
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 Posted: Wed Jul 23, 2008 4:20 pm Post subject: Ex Destroyer! I dont know why but it worked? |
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A few days ago I posted a thread about how to destroy ex Boyfriends. Now I have never had any problems with Boyfriend destroyers I simply find out from the girl what problems they have with there current boyfriend ie they never call or dont pay there girlfriends any attention, to which I reply im sure thats not true forcing the girls in an argument to condemn there boyfriend to justify there statements. Now my problem was Ex Bf's these guys could really cock block me! I couldnt do my usual defending the boyfriends faults because that wouldn't go to down with a girl especially if the guy had hurt her and criticizing the Ex would merely cause her to justify her reasons for being with him in the first place and could drive her back to him.
Now this girl I asked out a few days ago said she was not ready to go out with me yet coz of problems with her Ex boyfriend who she had broke up with a month ago.
Now this is How I responded.
Me: Thats Ok I know what trouble exes can be I was out in a club a few weeks back when my Ex walked in with her new Boyfriend and felt really Awkward.
HB: But didnt that annoy you seeing her with someone else?
Me: Yeah of course it did but what was worse was I was with a girl I had just started seeing which made it more awkward. Once I had seen my ex there it put me in a bad mood which must have been obvious to the girl I was with coz I just wasn't myself and blew it with her.
(The statement was a partial truth it happened over a year ago but it hadnt been an Ex just a "casual friend")
I called again 2days later to ask if she wanted to go for drink she did and we have been seeing each other for over a week now.
Now I don't know how that worked because at the time I had thought I had crashed and burnt big time. Looking back at what I said I can see wholes in what I said and practically admitted to her cases where I had been jealous and needy.
If anyone can give me opinions or analyse any possible unintentional NLP i did as to why it worked I would appreciate it. Because I intend on replicating its success in the future. |
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JSmooth
PUA Forum Leader
Joined: 20 Oct 2007
Posts: 2151
Location: Nashville
Reputation: 247.1
votes: 22
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| Posted: Wed Jul 23, 2008 6:49 pm Post subject: |
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The reason it worked is you grounded yourself in her reality with showing you know just how she feels. You also talked about what would be a worst case scenario of an ex seeing you in public. If she went out with you that's the worst that could happen. She knows you understand how she feels about it, and you identified with her on that level. This she felt a connection for you and you two are together.
Congrats man! |
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c-los
New to PUA Forum
Joined: 07 Sep 2007
Posts: 6
Reputation: 21.9
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| Posted: Thu Jul 24, 2008 12:57 am Post subject: |
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| this is an interestig topic to which i can relate, from my own dating experience, i would say 50 percent of the women i've dated have had a boyfriend or and 30percent have had an ex problem. before i knew about Picking up women i was doing most of the right things with out realizing it. Now days i can honestly say that my skill with boyfriend destroyers have improved do to the fact that i know now what im doing right and have been able to improve. i agree with the comment that you did the right thing by showing her that you know how shee feels and identifiying with her on the a worst case scenario. but be carefull, because you run the risk of becoming just the rebound guy. You could become someone who she feels confortable with because she knows that you understand how she feels, but after a while shell get bored because she will begin to identify you with her ex. That is to say, she might be just using you to replace that relationship that she has lost, and your there just as her security blanket. Your on the right track but play it cool, and keep your eyes open, dont spend all your time on her, and try to avoid too many exboyfriend conversations. the goal is to show her that your a great guy who wont presure her, but keep your options open, she will realize that if she keep dweling on the past she will loose the great guy she has found.........be the challege. |
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alphamale_16
New to PUA Forum
Joined: 16 Jul 2008
Posts: 10
Location: Spain
Reputation: 2.5
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| Posted: Fri Jul 25, 2008 10:06 am Post subject: |
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Many of the girls lie when they say they have boyfriend, it is just a way of getting rid of the boys that try to pick up them...But PUAs have to show they are alpha males, and they CAN'T answer : "Oh..you have boyfriend...well, I think I should go...nice to meet you"....Never.
Here is a way to answer a girl that says she has boyfriend:
Me: ...
HB: Haha...well, sorry but I have boyfriend...
Me: Gooood! Haha, so if you get bored about me, you have another boy to be with...but you won't get bored about me...Do you know why?
HB: why?
Me: Because once a girl discovers my secrete, I capture her emotion for ever and ever...
HB: What secrete?
And you keep talking keeping the mystery. When you reach A3 you will really know if she has boyfriend or not. |
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