I've seen alot of people needing tips on confidence and in general having alot of AA, so I figured I'd post this short post and help anyone out it can
Let me know if it helps!
Confidence is..?
To improve your confidence you need to reassess what confidence is, and do it quickly. See it in a similar way people say respect is - You have to give it to earn it. In many ways this is true of confidence. You've got to demonstrate confidence in order to earn/build/have confidence. Confidence isn't something everyone has a set amount of - it varies from day to day, situation to situation. Confidence varies due to your confort zone. So act more comfortable. Consider your body language, change it to be more casual. Consider your speech, prevent it from being awkward or too fast.
Body Language
Develop your body language and you'll emit confidence. If you emit confidence you'll feel the results with the way people treat you differently. This will boost your confidence and actually lift it to the level you've been portraying it as all along. A term I often use that describes this perfectly is a
Self-Fulfilling Prophecy. It works
In for a penny, in for a pound
This may be an English term but I think people in the US understand it too. It basically means if your going to do something, be committed, do it whole-heartedly, dont waste your time!
When saying in for a penny etc I mean dont do something thinking "i'll get this over with, then its done". Do something thinking "Let's see what situation I get myself into here" and "ok, how can I make this better". The amount of times I've convinced AFC mates to approach (which is an achievement for them) to come back with a big smile on their face after bombing annoys the hell out of me. They see their feeble, stuttery attempts as successful because they went in with the mind-frame of "get this done, go back to my mates, be praised for having balls".
Well guess what? They aint getting praised. Anyone can "have balls" for walking over with a defeatist mind-frame, but try a confident one and just observe the improvement it gets you in an approach!
DISCLAIMER
I might sound AFC-snobby right now (just coined the term - I want it to mean Anti-AFC because they're below PUAs
) but I'm not. It's just such an easy step to take (having a positive, confident mind-frame) that seeing people ignore it leaves me disappointed and frustrated.
This isn't my full knowledge on the subject so if you've any questions, I'd be happy to help you out with specifics
I've got a poll running for a week just to see a quantitative response to whether this is helping or not, feel free to vote
GrifterUK
CHAT