After a couple of relationships, and several talks with female friends, and boyfriends who got dumpeds . I came to some conclusions than I’m going to share to you.

You have to realize one thing, women are programmed to manipulate. While man through out history conquer things by force, women had to evolved in different way order to conquer, look at of Cleopatra, she put Rome on her knees, just by her charm, but special due to her cunning and manipulation skills over a dozen of powerfull Men.

If you think your girl is different and she wouldn’t manipulate sorry she is not, I’ve seen even uglies doing that. I came to realize was that woman’s in the begin of the relationship they try to give a innocent vibe, so you let your guard down, so she can start manipulating you at her will. Is their screening process, and to be fair it’s in woman nature…

I dated this girl who would manipulate me, would start fights, and would make jealousy plotlines who would do the craziest things ever. And for some reasons she would find in her head that she was always right, blaming me, and would gave light hints that she was going to cut me lose in short period time, if I didnt behave.

For alot of time I was clueless to that type of manipulation, and honestly thought my girlfriend was the only one doing this but I experienced this with other girls and alot of my friends report the same thing.

So her objective was simple fear. Same strategy (of course in a different manner lol) is also used through out history for example the Nazis and most recent by Americans, for months the only words pronounced by them were TERRORIST that a terrorist can come to your home and kill your family. They even talk that terrorist was smuggling pen bombs. Then they generalize things

There objective was to induce fear in to the population and people where in constantly state of alert and frightened, and because of that they removed a lot of civil rights, and invade countries that had nothing to do in order to achieve their goals.

I told this little story because woman does the same, they tried to put this fear in your head.

Fear of losing her.

And this is for me one of the main reasons that relationships go to hell, when you have that fear you start doing illogical decisions base on this fear. You try to please her disregarding your wishes. This is why I think relationships fail hard, fear make us become paranoid and with low self esteem. How she is going to love if you dont love yourself. This is the first step for failure.

At this point for me you are in parasitic relationship and in a lost battle because she is sucking all your self esteem, she is the one gaining this.

She will come to a conclusion in the meantime … Your are not the man she wants time to move on. Lets face it you lost all respect you have by your self, you are doing as she wants to. So break up is in order.

After that of course she is going to feel with high self esteem you are now a sad loser, she dumped you, and that how she wants things running . Think as stock market, her capital went to the roof, while your capital is downhill spire.

You have nothing to offer. But still you try those grand romantic gestures to win her over. If it worked on the movies it will work on me.

What you fail to realize is that movies are movies and reality oh well you know. I’m not saying you shouldn’t do a romantic gesture, you should, special when you did something very stupid and she is mad with you and has valid reasons

But when she breaks up with you this is not the case. Your grand romantic plan will fail because you have nothing to offer, imagine its like a small company trying to buy Google not going to happen. You simply dont have enough power or capital to do so.

You have to realize this.

You need to win your self esteem and respect. Respect the cock lolol. Put value on your company.

Going after her , only will lower your value and show her you are desperate. Stop.

Understand that she was the one to break up with. What she is telling you is this,I will find someone better in no time, you in the other hand wont. Prove her wrong, nothing will hurt more than this. This is huge if you want her back.

Do you really want someone who is not afraid of losing you?

Yes she the love of your life. But you are not being logical, your emotions are all over the place you are not think straight, win your self esteem back(Gym, game other girls, eat healthy cut contact). You can only love other girls when you start loving yourself.

In short

You will not be manipulated by crying, yelling, lying, head games, sexual withdrawal, jealousy ploys, pity plays, shit tests, hot/cold/hot/cold, disappearing acts, or guilt trips. Simple ignore or don’t put up with that shit. You need to start respecting you and saying NO I will not put up with this.

Because in the end if you go down this path, of giving in her manipulations, she will lose your respect and you win perhaps months or weeks but the outcome will be same.

Remember love yourself YOU ARE THE PRIZE. And this will help you maitain a relantioship.

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Oh! You've gotta be kidding me!

women, AND MEN (but particularly women) are always boundary testing with people; it's human nature. If you offer no resistance than you're the one they'll decidedly walk all over until they grow bored and move onto something better.

Ofcourse. but like you said particulary women.

Men are more conformed.

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Oh! You've gotta be kidding me!

very good, snake doctor.

your wisdom is a great addition to the forum here.

+repped+

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what dr. house brings to medicine, i bring to everyday life (an extreme dose of cynicism), don't listen to the curmudgeon!

Very informative man. It's also pretty funny how much I can relate to that last statement
I remember one time with an ex we had plans to hang out during the weekend but we got into an argument hours before and she said not to come over. I told her if thats what she wanted then I wasn't going to. After a weekend of not talking to each other, she calls me up crying, trying to pull the "I'm the victim" card by saying I don't care about the relationship because I didn't go up to see her. I told her I don't play stupid games and then broke up with her. The next day, she apologized profusely and I decided to give her one more chance. I really did want the relationship to work, but I already had creeping doubts in the back of my head that the relationship was doomed. We lasted for about another 3 months until she pulled some dumb childish shit again and thats when I had enough. No woman is worth sacrificing your self-respect and integrity.

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Pretty little girls, so used to getting your way. Along comes a man who challenges you, and suddenly you don't know what to say.

So when will come to a woman that doesn't do this? Never, right? So you're going to leave every girl because you can't handle their stupid games? Every girl is going to do this, you've got to learn to deal with it or else you're going to find yourself breaking up with every girl like this

You guys should read "Train your girlfriend" by Matt Huston