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phattlewt
New to PUA Forum
Joined: 15 Jan 2008
Posts: 2
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 Posted: Sun Jan 27, 2008 3:34 am Post subject: attraction and reputation in a tight-knit group? |
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I come from a tight-knit friend town. Gossip takes over everyone's lives. I've been a AFC and nice guy my entire life, and haven't even kissed a girl at 18. I've been hit on enough to feel good about my image and had multiple options to advance to a GF/FB, but was too much of a nice guy to act on them.
I've been trying to fix this lately, but am in a bit of a pothole. My reputation is a bit tainted from the nice guy thing, along with a couple of emotional stability issues.
From what i've read about confidence, I shouldn't worry about this at all. I'm doing my best on accomplishing this, but i've never had godlike coping ability, so it does hamper me a little bit.
My question is what parts of attraction within a smaller group is much different than attraction in a city/large setting. I have little intention of pulling one nighters, but wouldn't mind an fb if that came along. I tried running a search but couldn't find anything with less than 5k options. 
My other question is how to redeem myself from this negative and innocent reputation. Is it as simple as just getting out there and proving everybody wrong, or is it somewhat similar to a friends zone? In addition, is there much else other than kino and AMOG actions that I could possibly pull to get out of this zone? |
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Hobbit
PUA Forum Leader
Joined: 10 Jan 2008
Posts: 874
Location: The Shire
Reputation: 110.5
votes: 11
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| Posted: Sun Jan 27, 2008 4:02 am Post subject: |
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My method for this type of environment (the majority of my life has been in these environments) is social proof. I was the same way a few years ago, and I got out of that "nice guy" role and become successful from doing the following steps.
1) Talking to semi-hot to hot girls. Not with intentions to pick them up, but to be friends.
2) Other girls notice you always have fine girls around you, building social proof.
3) Become alpha around your friends.
4) Using that social proof of those fine friends, attract girls outside that network. (In my experience, this has made the girls in my friend network start to like me).
I'm not sure if these steps are universal, but they always work for me. At a two year dormitory school I went to, I went from junior year of not talking to anyone (Hated the school and people so I stayed in my room) to senior year dating one of the hottest girls in school.
Hope this gives you some ideas on how to act. |
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phattlewt
New to PUA Forum
Joined: 15 Jan 2008
Posts: 2
Reputation: 0.2
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| Posted: Sun Jan 27, 2008 4:30 am Post subject: |
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| I understand what you're saying and i'll try it out. What i didn't mention earlier is that I only really hang out with one girl who is about an HB8, but here she's considered god because of the lack of HB's in general. I guess you could call it a bit of one-itis since I am slightly fond of her, but using logic I wouldn't date her even if she wanted to. I hang out with her friends sometimes, who I consider part of her "clique". My other couple friends are loners with no real links. It feels awkward calling up someone I haven't talked to in months. I think i'll just go to parties with her and attempt to redeem/meet people from there. |
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Hobbit
PUA Forum Leader
Joined: 10 Jan 2008
Posts: 874
Location: The Shire
Reputation: 110.5
votes: 11
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| Posted: Sun Jan 27, 2008 4:59 am Post subject: |
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| Yea. Going out with girls gets you girls way easier than going out with male friends. Just make sure she realizes your there to pick up girls. |
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