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Read enough advice in the pickup and seduction community and you're bound to come across some that warns you of the dangers inherent in thinking too much while wooing the woman of your dreams (or, at least, the woman of the moment), and rightly so.
Seduction is a natural, instinctive, carnal thing and in order for it to proceed as nature intended, it's best if the behaviors and actions taken come from an instinctual, carnal place. And after all, isn't the ultimate point of being here to make successful behaviors instinct? To create habits that change the others behave toward us?
The answer is an unqualified yes, and overthinking things unquestionably gets in the way of that process - in field.
But this forum, as the experienced must regularly remind the inexperienced, is not the field. It's a place on the internet for people to theorize and offer advice based on what they've learned by participating in the big, bad world; both of these things are enhanced by, and indeed impossible without, using our brains.
It's a simple truth, really, and one especially easy to grasp when you consider that none of us would even be here if SOMEONE hadn't thought about and analyzed these basic human interactions before us.
Which makes me wonder why the modern pickup community seems so hellbent on abandoning thoughtful commentary altogether. In the last few days, I have seen countless posts advising impressionable newbies to completely disregard any sort of 'game' and replace it with candid, usually vulgar statements of desire. And, if she's not into it, hey, some other girl will be, right?
Listen, I get it: you want to be edgy and get to the lay as quickly as possible. Hey, if that's your thing, fine. If it's working for you and you're truly happy with the quality of the results, you won't hear any protest from me.
But say you want a serious relationship with one of the lucky women you've decided to grace with your company. Or, hell, say you view women as people instead of life support for vaginas. Do you really think this brand of 'game' is best suited to your personal beliefs?
I would wager that it isn't. And I can say from experience that you are missing out on a shit-ton of really cool stuff by being so focused on your destination that you forget to enjoy the scenery on the journey there. I don't know about you guys, but I love women, and ever since I was a kid, I always wanted to spend as much time around them as possible, clothed or unclothed, sexed or unsexed, in my bed or even in church.
Why? Because they're wonderful, lovely creatures and every one of them has some beautiful, surprising little secret they're just waiting to reveal to a guy who can really move them.
Now I ask you: why not be that guy?
Your boy,
870
While I certainly agree with your post 870, I have to humbly disagree. I too view women as human beings with feelings, hearts, and emotions. And yes, they too are a very important component of the human race. With that being said, when learning to do anything, the most important step in my opinion is to build experience. Every person in the history of humanity at some point or another had to build experience however they had to build experience. I too view the current trend of anti-intellectualism as worrisome, but in some respects I actually view it as the proper course.
Before, in game there was a tremendous focus on "doing things right", on instinctively thinking things out, on having them pre-planned. This could be one of the defining ideals behind the mystery method and to a certain extent several NLP techniques. As a rebellion against this previous era of PUA, newer guys have sought to use emotions and feelings. More importantly, PUA has discovered a word which has been uttered freely only for the last 150 years, risk. Without risk there can be no gain, and without gain there can be no improvement. Risk is the foundation for all improvement, whether that improvement is within a self or a society. Before, too many men were afraid of taking risk, most forms of pick up before now have sought to minimize risk; this new form of game seeks to exploit risk. In my opinion this is a critical life lesson, without risk, there is no reward.
In my short life, nothing is more important than this phase of learning, the phase where you are willing to risk it all in order to gain both knowledge and wisdom. Before, I myself like many men dabbled in detail and worrisome thoughts, but as I grew older I knew the best option was to let go. There is nothing sweeter than those first moments that you let go of all of life’s worries. There is nothing more relieving than learning to plan for a little and then letting things happen. It is a thought process that is hard to learn and better still hard to have.
Is this conducive to getting the best relationships or women? Perhaps not, but it is good at satisfying the temporary goal of learning human interaction and the art of sex. And after all, isn't that what this community is based upon? Satisfying that temporary carnal desire, that thirst which is innate in all men? You are requesting some transcendent ideology which is extremely mature, but in my humble opinion is misplaced. This community like all other communities is concerned with only one thing, results. It is a community of men who espouse to sex, and quite sadly (in some cases) the "fame" that is associated with the lifestyle. Why else would men be so preoccupied with this subject?
I see the issue is not being one of the community but a question which all individual men must ask themselves. Why am I here? The way most men find this community is through failure, despair, and distress. Keep in mind Mr.870 that this is the crowd in which PUA must attend to. After these men have asked for advice from friends, family, and colleagues they have straggled to the last place which would answer them- us. It is therefore not an issue of the community, but of how most men get to this community in the first place. Was this community intellectual to begin with 870? I humbly ask this question. These are not fighting words, just something to think about.
CHAT
