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Swizz
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Joined: 23 Oct 2009
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Posted: Fri Oct 23, 2009 8:33 pm Post subject: Desperate/Lonely Girl? |
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Met this one girl today and she gave some desperate/lonely signs.
For one thing she was all over me, it's like I didn't even have to try, complimenting me and shit. I still brought out the C&F on her and she called me mean and the usual stuff while laughing. We had the same class after wards and she asked me to sit next her and I was thinking WTF. But the signs idk.
She's like a 7-8/10, and I don't know if I should take advantage of her LOL?? |
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Chief
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Location: South Korea
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Posted: Sat Oct 24, 2009 3:28 am Post subject: Re: Desperate/Lonely Girl? |
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| Swizz wrote: | Met this one girl today and she gave some desperate/lonely signs.
For one thing she was all over me, it's like I didn't even have to try, complimenting me and shit. I still brought out the C&F on her and she called me mean and the usual stuff while laughing. We had the same class after wards and she asked me to sit next her and I was thinking WTF. But the signs idk.
She's like a 7-8/10, and I don't know if I should take advantage of her LOL?? |
"Take advantage?" What the hell are you talking about? She's not drunk or anything, is she? If you still think of sex as something that you are wrongfully TAKING from a woman, you've got some serious work to do.
Anyways, if you find her attractive, bone her. If you don't find her attractive, don't. It's not that difficult of a decision. Your question belongs in the Newbie Questions section of the forum, by the way, and not here. |
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magnum45
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Joined: 17 Feb 2008
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Posted: Sat Oct 24, 2009 8:57 am Post subject: |
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| Where does he go to get that "work"? |
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Chief
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Posted: Sat Oct 24, 2009 12:30 pm Post subject: |
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| magnum45 wrote: | | Where does he go to get that "work"? |
The seduction community has a plethora of information. If you seek, then you will find (as long as you don't get distracted by the flashy marketing from Mystery as you so did, magnum45).
For developing a healthy and nonjudgmental mindset about sexuality, I recommend material from David Shade and Johnny Soporno. |
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Luky
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Posted: Wed Oct 28, 2009 4:05 am Post subject: |
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I keep getting mixed messages from this white girl about whether she's attracted to me at all or not. I setup a date which seems to be a pretty good idea to her initially. We text back and forth and I never send her anything unless she replies; she shit tested me by responding to the actual date message 5 hours later (might have been a bad sign to begin with). I kept it a low priority on the day of the actual date by texting a joke to her (not even mentioning the date) then I get dead silence, nothing, no response, thus no date.
I saw her again on campus (Monday) and she was avoiding eye contact with me, I didn't play the victim, I thought I did a good job on everything... the only thing that occurred to me as something I did wrong was no kino... I can't really pinpoint what I did wrong other than that... maybe she just doesn't like Asians? I mean, is that HONESTLY a good enough reason to NOT go out with a guy?
I don't know how much at fault I am for not developing kino; but this is the first dead-end I've reached and it's kind of an eye-opening experience that you won't even cross a girl's mind (I've never experienced this kind of feedback before, normally the past girls are little more receptive to what's going on and flirt a little). Maybe I'm thinking too negatively, but I'm trying to think of what I did wrong so I can build upon my past experience. I'm reaching a gray area I can't pull any knowledge from. I wonder if I should even bother with her anymore, I want to rebuild a friendship at least...
I'm hanging out with more girls now (white ones horray!) but they give a lot of shit about Asian guys and it instinctively puts me on the defensive. I'm trying to fix that, but it's hard because nobody has the same experience as us. It'd be nice to have somebody to relate to other than the forums, some of my friends think I'm crazy (I noticed I'm hanging out with them less because they don't take any risks other than studying on a Saturday night), but in the end they give me mad respect which I'm actually enjoying.
Anyhow, I bounced my disappointment back by getting another girl's number and setup a "date" (she's taken, but I was totally in a "don't give a fuck" mood and I can sense her attraction, she's Asian and hot and told me her "chest was sore" heh) and I'm going to try get another one tomorrow. I mean, I'm improving, numbers are easy now (this took a whole month to do), but dates with white women just seem difficult. I'm also throwing events in November to establish myself as a leader. Suggestions? Comments? |
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Chief
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Posted: Wed Oct 28, 2009 1:18 pm Post subject: |
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| Luky wrote: | I keep getting mixed messages from this white girl about whether she's attracted to me at all or not. I setup a date which seems to be a pretty good idea to her initially. We text back and forth and I never send her anything unless she replies; she shit tested me by responding to the actual date message 5 hours later (might have been a bad sign to begin with). I kept it a low priority on the day of the actual date by texting a joke to her (not even mentioning the date) then I get dead silence, nothing, no response, thus no date.
I saw her again on campus (Monday) and she was avoiding eye contact with me, I didn't play the victim, I thought I did a good job on everything... the only thing that occurred to me as something I did wrong was no kino... I can't really pinpoint what I did wrong other than that... maybe she just doesn't like Asians? I mean, is that HONESTLY a good enough reason to NOT go out with a guy?
I don't know how much at fault I am for not developing kino; but this is the first dead-end I've reached and it's kind of an eye-opening experience that you won't even cross a girl's mind (I've never experienced this kind of feedback before, normally the past girls are little more receptive to what's going on and flirt a little). Maybe I'm thinking too negatively, but I'm trying to think of what I did wrong so I can build upon my past experience. I'm reaching a gray area I can't pull any knowledge from. I wonder if I should even bother with her anymore, I want to rebuild a friendship at least...
I'm hanging out with more girls now (white ones horray!) but they give a lot of shit about Asian guys and it instinctively puts me on the defensive. I'm trying to fix that, but it's hard because nobody has the same experience as us. It'd be nice to have somebody to relate to other than the forums, some of my friends think I'm crazy (I noticed I'm hanging out with them less because they don't take any risks other than studying on a Saturday night), but in the end they give me mad respect which I'm actually enjoying.
Anyhow, I bounced my disappointment back by getting another girl's number and setup a "date" (she's taken, but I was totally in a "don't give a fuck" mood and I can sense her attraction, she's Asian and hot and told me her "chest was sore" heh) and I'm going to try get another one tomorrow. I mean, I'm improving, numbers are easy now (this took a whole month to do), but dates with white women just seem difficult. I'm also throwing events in November to establish myself as a leader. Suggestions? Comments? |
Luky,
As I've said before, game is a bit different for Asian men in America. You have to be more indirect is some ways, and direct in some other ways.
If you actually want to use the word "date" and have it work out for you, you have to be the most alpha fucker you can be. It's easier, however, to frame your day 2s as something like just "hanging out," or having mutual friends involved while you isolate later on.
Kino is really important here. If you don't kino escalate, you'll be grouped in as just another asexual Asian guy. Focus on being a sensual being. If you want, you can even look up chakras and learn to open up your sacral chakra.
I think, for us Asian guys, we need to be verbally more indirect and be more direct with our state and everything else that's nonverbal. However, there are times when you must bust out the dirty dirty dirty talk.
That girl you mentioned first may have flaked for any number of reasons. In your situation, just maintain your positive and sensual frame and keep interacting with her as if nothing happened. Rule of thumb: Ignore noncompliance and reward compliance. Also, if a white chick isn't into Asian guys at all, you still may be able to have a shot with her, but she's going to have a really tough and nonsexual shield up from the get-go. This isn't the case with the girl you mentioned because she agreed to go on a date with you initially.
Next time you arrange for an isolated day 2, call the girl about 5 or 10 minutes before the agreed upon meeting time to tell her that you're going to be a couple minutes late. This does many useful things:
1. It functions as a DHV because you are showing that you are busy with potentially more important things in your life.
2. It acts as a form of "undercover confirmation" (as Vin DiCarlo puts it) because you're finding out whether or not she's going to show up without even asking her.
3. You're making her wait for you, which basically forces her to INVEST a little more in you, increasing attraction from an Adam Lyons point of view.
Overall, I think you're doing great because you're moving forward instead of dwelling on this specific girl like a lot of guys do. |
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Fin
PUA Forum Leader
Joined: 21 Mar 2008
Posts: 852
Location: Aberdeen.
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Posted: Wed Oct 28, 2009 2:23 pm Post subject: |
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Hey Chief, one quick thing I've been pondering on.
I enjoy maintaining rapport in day game when n closing, but things like making introductions and generally extracting information I find is risky, as it may break the rapport that I've built.
How do I go about learning these specific details (I would like these minor details, as, if she realises that neither of you know each others first name it may break rapport again) without breaking rapport? |
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tbone10
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Joined: 03 Nov 2009
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Posted: Tue Nov 03, 2009 1:19 am Post subject: |
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I need some help here.
There this one girl who is gourgous. She's in a class of mine (In college), and she sits a seat away. We usually look at each other and smile a few times during a class, which made me think she might be feeling me. I've made her laugh, and she's said things like, "We should do ____ together", etc. I'm doing well in the course, so me and her friend are going to study together this week.
Anyway, so I was texting her today, and she's playing around telling me how she's going to beat me up, and I tell her that I'm scared that a 5'4'' girl would beat me up, then she accuses me of looking at her in class and says I'm stalking her (Jokingly). I then said that she shouldn't have been pretty if she didn't want people looking back at her, and then said that she shouldn't act like she doesn't look back. She then says that she doesn't look back so I don't have to worry. This fucked me up a bit, and I said that I was glad since I'm not a piece of meat and do have feelings (I tried to be cocky/funny, but it seemed to fail since she didn't respond).
I see her in a couple days for our study group, and I'm a little lost as what to do now... And what to do considering a third person will be there. I decided to finally put my ego aside and ask some PUA's for help. I thought we were flirting a bit until her last text, and then once she didn't respond I knew I fucked up.
Any advice is appreciated. |
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Chief
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Posted: Tue Nov 03, 2009 3:09 pm Post subject: |
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| Fin wrote: | Hey Chief, one quick thing I've been pondering on.
I enjoy maintaining rapport in day game when n closing, but things like making introductions and generally extracting information I find is risky, as it may break the rapport that I've built.
How do I go about learning these specific details (I would like these minor details, as, if she realises that neither of you know each others first name it may break rapport again) without breaking rapport? |
After you've built rapport, intentionally break it. This will actually build some sort of attraction, kinda like the concept of negging in MM. Once you intentionally break rapport, the pressure of keeping rapport is lessened on both sides, so ultimately you build more comfort. And, by the NLP concept of fractionation, building rapport back up again will be easier and better after you've broken it.
Adam Lyons actually goes deep into this whole rapport breaking thing.
Don't forget to always keep the dynamic between you and the girl DYNAMIC. |
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Chief
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Posted: Tue Nov 03, 2009 3:17 pm Post subject: |
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| tbone10 wrote: | | This fucked me up a bit |
That's where shit went wrong.
The fact that she was able to break your frame meant that you failed her shit test and now she feels less attracted to you because of it.
| tbone10 wrote: | | I see her in a couple days for our study group, and I'm a little lost as what to do now... |
Just keep flirting with her, and don't let anything affect your mindset of "we both like each other and really want to have hot passionate sex right here and right now."
Please keep these sort of questions in the "Newbie Questions" board. |
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Brah
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Joined: 05 Oct 2009
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Posted: Tue Nov 03, 2009 3:28 pm Post subject: |
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| Hey Chief, is it ever right to give her your phone number instead of to get hers? |
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ZerO!
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Joined: 04 Nov 2009
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Posted: Thu Nov 05, 2009 3:37 am Post subject: Oneday.. |
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I want to be an instructor for mystery Or maybe for a upcoming MPUA like yourself? How did you get where you are now? You can post the answer on here or PM. How did you learn the info that you know?
I want to make a living doing something I love and like the joker said " If your good at something, Never do it for Free." How can I make this a realaity. I would be willing to do anything to at least get me started.
?????????? |
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Chief
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Posted: Thu Nov 05, 2009 5:18 am Post subject: |
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| Brah wrote: | | Hey Chief, is it ever right to give her your phone number instead of to get hers? |
If you really don't care about whether or not you two will meet up later, yes. Plenty of PUAs get tired of putting in the effort and they just give out their number to girls. Less things happen that way, but at least it lets them relax.
| ZerO! wrote: | | " If your good at something, Never do it for Free." |
First, you gotta get good. A virgin should not be considering this while he is a virgin. Not to sound harsh, but I know you in real life so this is something you need to hear.
It's rumored that Mehow started teaching pickup while he was still a virgin, and for the longest time he was the laughingstock of the seduction community because of that. He's more successful now as an instructor because a lot of newbies today don't know this.
Don't distract yourself with other goals other than just getting good at this stuff first. |
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ZerO!
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Posted: Thu Nov 05, 2009 9:23 pm Post subject: |
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| Thanks and your definitely right. I have some soul searching to do. |
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Luky
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Joined: 24 Sep 2009
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Posted: Sat Nov 07, 2009 6:45 am Post subject: |
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Hey Chief!
So I found out that oneitis girl was a lesbian... that explains why the fuck I was getting so much resistance. I was doing my current A-game and everything (that's not saying it's much, but I made a great deal of effort). What a bad start for becoming a PUA!
Long story short (and then to my questions), I'm not a desperate person so I just gave up after she stayed mad at me for no apparent reason. My friend was curious--wondering why I fucked up so badly when he didn't see anything wrong with my approaching either, so he looked her up on Facebook today. She had pictures of her kissing other girls and what not--no boys at all in her pictures; now it makes perfect sense...
But new questions started to arise... Should I use this experience to revise my approach? I mean, I don't think I did anything wrong... it's not like I can make her turn to the "dark-side" and love cock... I'm not sure what to do with this "fuck-up" to be honest.
Is "stalking" women on Facebook and other social networking sites worthwhile to do a background check? I tend to give people some level of privacy (I'm a private person; that's why), but after this event, I'm not sure what to do anymore... I definitely don't want this to happen again, and waste my time.
And for a bonus bogus question, is it even possible to convert her? I'm just curious because she's YOUNG and I don't take her as a legit lesbian. Not that I'm going to pursue her anymore, but if I find myself in a similar situation I want the challenge of turning the tables around when I get better at this stuff! |
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