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Wingspan New to PUA Forum
Joined: 03 Dec 2007 Posts: 5
Location: Cleveland, OH Reputation: 1.8  


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Posted: Sun Dec 23, 2007 6:50 pm Post subject: "I Have a Boyfriend" |
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| I was at a small get together (seven people) and I sarged the available HB flawlessly. I had her mirroring, begging for attention, obeying commands, and qualifying herself. She was done, I was in, I was sure of it. I isolated, and when I went for the kiss close, she turned it down. A few minutes later she whispered in my ear, "the thing is I have a boyfriend." Granted, this by no means should stop a PUA. I have analyzed my own flaws in the sarging process (there was only one), but my question is how to you respond to this? I froze her out completely, but she moved to talk to a guy who had mercilessly LJBFed himself during the course of the night. I then had to leave. How would you handle it? |
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Yillan Member of PUA Forum
Joined: 25 Nov 2007 Posts: 118
Reputation: 39  


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Posted: Sun Dec 23, 2007 7:51 pm Post subject: |
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Freezing her out because she has a boyfriend, well, if she wasn't serious that just confirms to her that you were only talking to her for sex. If she was serious, then it likely didn't win you any friends, but it again made your reasons for talking to her clear.
Personally, I would have ignored the boyfriend comment and kept talking to her. You never know when she could come in useful as a pivot/pawn, or if she'll decide later on in the night that you're more interesting than her boyfriend. That, or moved on to other people without freezing her out...pawn her to get into another set. |
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PrettyBoy41 Dedicated Member
Joined: 24 Sep 2007 Posts: 525
Location: the YAY area Reputation: 79.4   votes: 1


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Posted: Sun Dec 23, 2007 8:21 pm Post subject: |
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i think freeze outs in that sitation are wrong because it only confirms to her that you're intentions are sexual. you want to remain in control. even tho you went for the kiss doesnt yet point to your complete objective. and when she bitch shield/shit tested you, you failed because you showed that you were stoppable and that your intentions were impure.
I would have put my arm around her, squeezed, smiled and told her that she worries too much, left my arm there, got back into the group conversation and maybe tried a kiss again later. |
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The Wild One PUA Forum Leader
Joined: 19 Sep 2007 Posts: 861
Location: Charlotte Reputation: 101.4   votes: 4


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Posted: Sun Dec 23, 2007 10:59 pm Post subject: |
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| Maybe she was being honest with you. If you did everything right she may have liked you but had invested to much in someone else to mess things up. You know?... Or You totally mis-read her signs for flirting and it wasn't flirting or attraction. |
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z-mac PUA Forum Enthusiast
Joined: 24 Nov 2007 Posts: 50
Reputation: 25.8  


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Posted: Mon Dec 24, 2007 6:32 am Post subject: |
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| PrettyBoy41 wrote: | i think freeze outs in that sitation are wrong because it only confirms to her that you're intentions are sexual. you want to remain in control. even tho you went for the kiss doesnt yet point to your complete objective. and when she bitch shield/shit tested you, you failed because you showed that you were stoppable and that your intentions were impure.
I would have put my arm around her, squeezed, smiled and told her that she worries too much, left my arm there, got back into the group conversation and maybe tried a kiss again later. |
This is good game here, an improper way to use a freeze out. Imagine a kid who didnt get his candy and puts a lip and crossed arm for that. This just is not smooth.
Good way to use a freeze is in attraction phase. You recipricate in busting on each other, than freeze out, than she should hook. In addition, go back to comfort. If I left anything out, hit me up. |
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Xfiend PUA Forum Enthusiast
Joined: 10 Dec 2007 Posts: 52
Reputation: 16.6   votes: 1

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Posted: Mon Dec 24, 2007 9:17 pm Post subject: |
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aye, should have gone cocky funny...
"omg, you were thinking about having sex with me" don't give her a chance to respond... just start a new, unrelated thread. |
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fortunehooks PUA Forum Addict
Joined: 14 Oct 2007 Posts: 222
Reputation: 41.1  


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Posted: Mon Dec 24, 2007 10:46 pm Post subject: |
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| Yep, all good advice here my friend. Think of freeze outs as a weapon that you don't ever want to pull out of your arsenal and use, unless it's seriously needed and in that case a freeze out totally wrecked anything you could've had with her. |
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anutharound PUA Forum Addict
Joined: 01 Dec 2007 Posts: 215
Reputation: 53.8   votes: 5

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Posted: Wed Dec 26, 2007 4:24 am Post subject: |
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She could have been honest it's true that most attractive girls have boyfriends, some good ways to respond are:
A. Cool then you can have 2, one to buy you dinner and give you compliments, and one you are attracted to.
B. Actually talk about him and frame him as an afc.
C. You should always ask her what her relationship status is earlier in the interaction that way the bf thing is already taken care of. She will more than likely share flaws in the relationship if you do this then relate to her by telling her flaws you have in her relationship(keep it positive!).
,and remember the bf thing is just something she has to get off her chest that way she doesn't feel bad about the dirty things she wants to do to you. |
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Valence PUA Forum Zealot
Joined: 22 Mar 2007 Posts: 418
Location: Austin Texas Reputation: 62.3   votes: 1


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Posted: Fri Dec 28, 2007 11:12 pm Post subject: |
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Straight from DD
"Great, he can make us dinner"
Do not bring it up again. Continue gaming. |
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Akumara PUA Forum Enthusiast
Joined: 18 Sep 2007 Posts: 40
Reputation: 33.4  

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Posted: Sun Dec 30, 2007 1:22 am Post subject: |
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I find that girls who have been in relationships for long periods of time actually thrive for attention from boys, just to see if THEY are still in the game .
But yea that sucks dude, you could have used BF destroyers but yer...might not be worth the moral aspect. |
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RhythM315 New to PUA Forum
Joined: 07 Jan 2008 Posts: 7
Reputation: 0.8  

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Posted: Thu Jan 10, 2008 7:22 am Post subject: |
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| I probably would've replied with something witty (Credit goes to: I honestly forgot where I heard these lines) "Whoa whoa whoa... I barely know you, and you're already telling me your problems GEEZ!" or "GREAT! He can cook and tidy up while we're out having fun." From there, I'd probably take a step back, start to DHV a little more, then use another kiss gambit again. |
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TrojanMan88 PUA Forum Zealot
Joined: 01 Jan 2008 Posts: 315
Reputation: 22.6   votes: 6

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Posted: Thu Jan 10, 2008 2:48 pm Post subject: |
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| what did you say to get the kiss close started? because that could have made all the difference...I usually use the mehow trust test to go for mine therefore I never get turned down... |
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SmokuKrK New to PUA Forum
Joined: 08 Dec 2006 Posts: 11
Location: Cracow Reputation: 19.8  

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Posted: Thu Jan 10, 2008 6:35 pm Post subject: |
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"ooooooh boooyfrieendd u said....f u c k !"
"i dont ask u about your boyfriend...u imagined too much...damn we know eachother for few minutes and u want me to be ur boyfriend....huh isnt it too fast ?"
"so?"
"great what we were talking about?"
- I have bf
- would u marry him?
- no/maybe in future
then u subliming her boyfriend next something like carpe diem story...and she have mess in her head u can go on KC  |
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JamesFlames PUA Forum Enthusiast
Joined: 29 Nov 2007 Posts: 71
Location: Canberra, Oz Reputation: 8.5   votes: 1

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Posted: Thu Jan 10, 2008 9:54 pm Post subject: |
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Dude,
u also could have disqualified yourself at the start by saying YOU have a gf. Indeed the only way to tell if she was possibly available, or up for shenanigans , would be if you were to escalate kino hoping she might make a move.
in fact if she believed that you had a GF and if she had a BF and (another IF) if she was up for it then she might have felt more comfortable cheating with another cheat.
I dunno.
Either way, congrats for trying, nothing ventured - nothing gained. |
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smudge Member of PUA Forum
Joined: 26 Dec 2007 Posts: 161
Location: Watford (North London), UK Reputation: 18.4   votes: 2

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Posted: Thu Jan 10, 2008 10:44 pm Post subject: |
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| SmokuKrK wrote: | "ooooooh boooyfrieendd u said....f u c k !"
"i dont ask u about your boyfriend...u imagined too much...damn we know eachother for few minutes and u want me to be ur boyfriend....huh isnt it too fast ?"
"so?"
"great what we were talking about?"
- I have bf
- would u marry him?
- no/maybe in future
then u subliming her boyfriend next something like carpe diem story...and she have mess in her head u can go on KC  |
couldnt have come up with better myself! |
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