PUA Forum :: philosophical sort of question

Women are basically, a very competitive species. Much, much more than us.

They laugh and smile in the company of their friends, but deep down they are always criticizing one thing or another even about their closest relationships.

Truth is, for a woman it is hard to accept and be at peace with the fact that there is a guy who they are with, and he has a higher social standing than her and is still being there with her.

They continuously have a need to rationalize our behavior. A woman will not be at peace unless she thinks she knows the reason behind even the smallest actions.

Also, they want to reduce us to their level because in their heads, equality is the basis of life. Maybe it's an overload of feminism. Maybe it isn't. Either way women want their partners, friends, fellow employees to all be on the same level as them.

When it isn't so, we have the inevitable criticism. A lot of "It's not a big deal" and "That's nothing special" and "A lot of people can do that/ have that" blah blah blah.

That's what I think. I may be wrong.

you know, i have noticed this but not just with girls, people in general, i think it is an insecurity thing, people get jealous or truly assume they are higher value so they try to put others down, if the other person accepts this frame, then they feel like they were right and that somehow makes them better, now on the other hand, if you don't accept the negative frame, and instead of pushing your own negative frame on them, you push a positive one where you don't judge them back for revenge but still don't acknowledge or accept there frame people begin to admire you

Quote:

aren't afc guys like this ?

Author:	Mack 2.0 [ Wed Jul 20, 2011 9:41 am ]
Post subject:	philosophical sort of question
ever noticed most women's tendency to try to "reduce" you? i'm talking about value. to try to like cancel out your value? especially when your value is genuine and not fake or manufactured. why do they do that? why the need to "reduce" people? they do it to each other too...

Author:	pumpington [ Wed Jul 20, 2011 10:14 am ]
Post subject:
you know, i have noticed this but not just with girls, people in general, i think it is an insecurity thing, people get jealous or truly assume they are higher value so they try to put others down, if the other person accepts this frame, then they feel like they were right and that somehow makes them better, now on the other hand, if you don't accept the negative frame, and instead of pushing your own negative frame on them, you push a positive one where you don't judge them back for revenge but still don't acknowledge or accept there frame people begin to admire you

Author:	Don Draper [ Wed Jul 20, 2011 10:35 am ]
Post subject:
Women are basically, a very competitive species. Much, much more than us. They laugh and smile in the company of their friends, but deep down they are always criticizing one thing or another even about their closest relationships. Truth is, for a woman it is hard to accept and be at peace with the fact that there is a guy who they are with, and he has a higher social standing than her and is still being there with her. They continuously have a need to rationalize our behavior. A woman will not be at peace unless she thinks she knows the reason behind even the smallest actions. Also, they want to reduce us to their level because in their heads, equality is the basis of life. Maybe it's an overload of feminism. Maybe it isn't. Either way women want their partners, friends, fellow employees to all be on the same level as them. When it isn't so, we have the inevitable criticism. A lot of "It's not a big deal" and "That's nothing special" and "A lot of people can do that/ have that" blah blah blah. That's what I think. I may be wrong.

Author:	Mack 2.0 [ Wed Jul 20, 2011 10:41 am ]
Post subject:
Quote: Women are basically, a very competitive species. Much, much more than us. They laugh and smile in the company of their friends, but deep down they are always criticizing one thing or another even about their closest relationships. Truth is, for a woman it is hard to accept and be at peace with the fact that there is a guy who they are with, and he has a higher social standing than her and is still being there with her. They continuously have a need to rationalize our behavior. A woman will not be at peace unless she thinks she knows the reason behind even the smallest actions. Also, they want to reduce us to their level because in their heads, equality is the basis of life. Maybe it's an overload of feminism. Maybe it isn't. Either way women want their partners, friends, fellow employees to all be on the same level as them. When it isn't so, we have the inevitable criticism. A lot of "It's not a big deal" and "That's nothing special" and "A lot of people can do that/ have that" blah blah blah. That's what I think. I may be wrong. brilliant explanation.

Author:	Mack 2.0 [ Wed Jul 20, 2011 10:42 am ]
Post subject:
Quote: you know, i have noticed this but not just with girls, people in general, i think it is an insecurity thing, people get jealous or truly assume they are higher value so they try to put others down, if the other person accepts this frame, then they feel like they were right and that somehow makes them better, now on the other hand, if you don't accept the negative frame, and instead of pushing your own negative frame on them, you push a positive one where you don't judge them back for revenge but still don't acknowledge or accept there frame people begin to admire you very true.

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Author:	lolaskate [ Wed Jul 20, 2011 10:58 am ]
Post subject:
Isn't it just an insecurity they have of not being enough? We are all insecure in some way. So girls also attempt to make their value you higher in respect to yours by reducing yours.

Author:	Tektolnes [ Wed Jul 20, 2011 12:06 pm ]
Post subject:
And you try to reduce their values too, don't you? Nietzsche would find this all natural. It is a woman's "Will to power" acting on, trying to gain dominance over and command the wills of others as much as possible (in this case, yours) She does that to reach the power (all naturally), which is the fundamental drive that dominates the universe.

Author:	EddieFews [ Wed Jul 20, 2011 1:57 pm ]
Post subject:
One thing I noticed is women are a completely reflection of the guy their with, my only expirEnces with a women trying to reduce me is when I lack humility and when I either over neg or bring them down in some way. I often find that when I'm uplifting and supporting the women I'm with they return the favor. I've never seen a women that tried bringing a man down that was lifting them up unless their a completely nut job

Author:	TheeMikeyK [ Wed Jul 20, 2011 2:37 pm ]
Post subject:
A lot of it has to deal with control, as well. Typically, the hotter the girl, the more she puts others down. My last HB was like this. It really pissed me off [to say the least].

Author:	DJ_Z [ Wed Jul 20, 2011 4:12 pm ]
Post subject:
Agreed with most of the other posts. I just don't see it as a female thing so much as a human fault. Everybody wants to feel good about themselves, and there are basically three ways to do that. One is to just believe you are awesome, which can be good or bad. Two is to do something exceptional and be recognized for it, which usually requires skill, time, and effort. Three is to belittle someone else, because you may still be considered great if the other person is considered your lesser. That third option is by far the easiest because all you need is to speak.

Author:	Lodewijkp [ Wed Jul 20, 2011 4:23 pm ]
Post subject:
Quote: Women are basically, a very competitive species. Much, much more than us. They laugh and smile in the company of their friends, but deep down they are always criticizing one thing or another even about their closest relationships. Truth is, for a woman it is hard to accept and be at peace with the fact that there is a guy who they are with, and he has a higher social standing than her and is still being there with her. They continuously have a need to rationalize our behavior. A woman will not be at peace unless she thinks she knows the reason behind even the smallest actions. Also, they want to reduce us to their level because in their heads, equality is the basis of life. Maybe it's an overload of feminism. Maybe it isn't. Either way women want their partners, friends, fellow employees to all be on the same level as them. When it isn't so, we have the inevitable criticism. A lot of "It's not a big deal" and "That's nothing special" and "A lot of people can do that/ have that" blah blah blah. That's what I think. I may be wrong aren't afc guys like this ?

Author:	Don Draper [ Wed Jul 20, 2011 4:25 pm ]
Post subject:
What do you mean?

Author:	Lodewijkp [ Wed Jul 20, 2011 5:10 pm ]
Post subject:
i just noticed that ''afc people''' are peforming the same behaviour. maybe because they are for a large part more aligned with their feminine side instead of their male masculine side ? from a psychological perspective it makes sense to me ... the ego always try to obtain something it doesn't have - that's a part of attraction - trying to obtain certain personality traits. they want to know if it's real or not ? the thought just struck me

Author:	Bloodninja93 [ Thu Jul 21, 2011 9:11 am ]
Post subject:
This is a very interesting point that you raise. Although in my experiences, it can be either a male or female that will choose to "reduce" you to their level, if your level was higher then theirs in the first place. I would have to say it's an act of jealousy and insecurities combined. Let me give you a quick example of something that happened recently: I had just finished telling a very entertaining story to a group of both sexes, and while everyone was laughing hysterically, a girl says out of no where "You're such a loser!" I was actually stunned for a minute there once she had said this. I wasn't quite sure what to say or how to react to that. I was more puzzled as to where this had come from. And looking at everyone's facial expressions around me was proof that this high value that I had acquired had plummeted. Why did this girl feel the need to say this? Was it because she wishes she could have told an entertaining story like I just did? Was she jealous? Will we ever understand what goes on in women's minds??

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Author:	EddieFews [ Thu Jul 21, 2011 10:25 am ]
Post subject:
Quote: Quote: Women are basically, a very competitive species. Much, much more than us. They laugh and smile in the company of their friends, but deep down they are always criticizing one thing or another even about their closest relationships. Truth is, for a woman it is hard to accept and be at peace with the fact that there is a guy who they are with, and he has a higher social standing than her and is still being there with her. They continuously have a need to rationalize our behavior. A woman will not be at peace unless she thinks she knows the reason behind even the smallest actions. Also, they want to reduce us to their level because in their heads, equality is the basis of life. Maybe it's an overload of feminism. Maybe it isn't. Either way women want their partners, friends, fellow employees to all be on the same level as them. When it isn't so, we have the inevitable criticism. A lot of "It's not a big deal" and "That's nothing special" and "A lot of people can do that/ have that" blah blah blah. That's what I think. I may be wrong aren't afc guys like this ? Nothings about what you do anymore as much as it's "how" you do it. An afc does those things out of a place of desperation and neediness. They do it to make the women like them more. When I do it, it's because I want to see them thrive and become better. An afc, will tell a women she's beautiful and so will I, however the reactions we get will be different, because it's coming from two different frames. Can a healthy relationship possibly exsist between two people constantly trying to reduce each other? Would you even tolerate that behavior from a women? Be dominate, and control the direction of the relationship, or even the interaction. I'm sure if you started approaching old ladys they wouldn't be trying to reduce you, not because they're old; probably because you don't need anything from them. You realize that they need your help a lot more than you need theirs. See where I'm going?