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| Avoiding Breakup Drama https://www.pick-up-artist-forum.com/viewtopic.php?f=6&t=95121 |
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| Author: | niftypickle [ Sat Jul 02, 2011 5:39 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Avoiding Breakup Drama |
A few months back I was in a relationship with a girl who went 180 on me after we had sex I didn't really see it coming (we had been friends for months beforehand and she seemed really cool, intelligent, and level-headed beforehand, and I was believe it or not taking things slow with her at first), tried to guilt trip me about it even though she was horny all the time and initiated sex and admitted to me she'd had a crush on me for months, got super needy got all pissed that I renewed my lease on my apt and didn't want to move in with her after only a month of dating (she'd never asked me to move in btw, just decided to get pissed), got all pissed b/c her friends starting coming on to me, got all pissed that I wasn't calling her during the work day when both of us were working to talk when I had real work to do, you get the idea of what I dealt with here... So after the breakup she tried to call me all the time trying to stir drama, did the whole "let's be friends/I love you/I hate you" thing, talked major crap behind my back to our mutual friends that was untrue I found out. I ended up losing some friends over the whole ordeal in this group we were both in b/c they don't want to be around any kind of drama like that (I don't blame them), I ultimately blocked her phone # it was just a little too much. Found out later she did the same thing to two other guys I knew, what a mess. Hindsight is 20/20, live and learn. So, question time... A) How would a PUA qualify better than I did? B) How would a PUA do better damage control in this situation? If there's one thing I hate it's losing friendships and potential hookups on account of one person. I've stepped away from that entire group, but I'd like to learn something valuable from the experience if I ever get faced with a similar situation ever again. |
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| Author: | DJ_Z [ Sun Jul 03, 2011 12:26 am ] |
| Post subject: | |
how old are you? I'm 23, and sadly this sounds like the kind of thing I see all the time. People my age think they live in the reality shows like Jersey Shore they watch on tv. Drama is interesting, and some people love to hear themselves talk. Together those two facts of life can make for some shitty times. I take the high road now. I never say anything behind a person's back that I hadn't said to them before. I will never say anything negative or go into detail about what I think someone's problem is unless directly asked for that opinion. If people come to me and ask "what's up with her, she's been talkin mad shit," I will simply say the truth, without editorial "she is mad because of (insert events here)." People can draw their own conclusions. Friends who leave because they need to take sides aren't worth my friendship. And there are plenty of women so I don't care if I lose a couple hookup opportunities, by the way its rarely good to work your way through a group of girls that are friends anyways. Stay above gossip and many people will respect you for it. Those people are generally the kind who are worth your respect as well. |
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| Author: | pumpington [ Sun Jul 03, 2011 12:52 am ] |
| Post subject: | |
I think you handled that the best way you could, sometimes you just have to throw your head back and think man... bitchez be crazy |
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| Author: | niftypickle [ Sun Jul 03, 2011 12:53 am ] |
| Post subject: | |
Quote: how old are you? I'm 23, and sadly this sounds like the kind of thing I see all the time. People my age think they live in the reality shows like Jersey Shore they watch on tv. Drama is interesting, and some people love to hear themselves talk. Together those two facts of life can make for some shitty times.
Very true dude, that's why I ended up leaving the group, I tried to steer clear of the drama beforehand too. You're right on it barely being good work to try with a set of girls who are somewhat friends. That's only somewhat true in this situation though, everyone was part of a group that goes out and does fun things together, but not everyone is necessarily friends. I think that these other gals were more or less being just competitive against her when they came onto me though. Oh well...
I take the high road now. I never say anything behind a person's back that I hadn't said to them before. I will never say anything negative or go into detail about what I think someone's problem is unless directly asked for that opinion. If people come to me and ask "what's up with her, she's been talkin mad shit," I will simply say the truth, without editorial "she is mad because of (insert events here)." People can draw their own conclusions. Friends who leave because they need to take sides aren't worth my friendship. And there are plenty of women so I don't care if I lose a couple hookup opportunities, by the way its rarely good to work your way through a group of girls that are friends anyways. Stay above gossip and many people will respect you for it. Those people are generally the kind who are worth your respect as well. |
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