PUA Forum :: How should I respond to this flake?

I concur. An attempt to reschedule means she's interested. But, your texts sound cheesy. I'm a proponent of no texting or very little. It gives them too much wiggle room and a leash to keep you on. You're commenting too much on her physicality and cuteness way too soon. Let her be interested in you. You be the prize.

You should have said something like, "You're on probation." I don't like the you can make it up to me angle. Go out for a cup of coffee not an in-house cookfest. You haven't even't met this girl yet. There's too much chit chat. Make the date and get out of there until you meet. The probation line works better face to face with a grin too.

Never talk about the future either. Let there be mystery and wonder if she'll see or hear from you again. Don't say, "I'll see you later." or "I'll catch you later." or "I'll call you tomorrow.". Drives chicks crazy.

Quote:

DUDE! We really need to hang out! Either that or stop reading my mind! I usually use "you're on time out"

Murrieta, CA... about an hour north of San Diego...

I'm in Del Mar in North County. I'm leaving for Oklahoma for 18 months for a Master's degree and right now I'm in Mississippi for work, but keep in touch. I just got back into this forum.

Quote:

I'm in Del Mar in North County. I'm leaving for Oklahoma for 18 months for a Master's degree and right now I'm in Mississippi for work, but keep in touch. I just got back into this forum.

Dude, I'm originally from MS. Grew up there! I'll PM you my email for facebook or something..

Author:	GKS [ Wed May 11, 2011 9:22 pm ]
Post subject:	How should I respond to this flake?
I set up a day2 lunch with this HB8 tomorrow over a week ago, I had 2 short txt conversations with her during the time gap. However, today, the day before our lunch, I sent her a txt. Me: Btw, I'll meet you there tomorrow at 1. Don't be too cute ! ( cuz I didn't set the exact time when I invited her last week ) She responded within 5 min: Her: Is it tomorrow?! I can't. I'll be out of town. Reschedule? Normally I deal with flakes by freezing them out. However, this girl was really into me and shows a lot of IOIs, so I do think she might have forgotten, since she told me last week that it will be a pretty hectic week for her. So I think I should give her a chance since she shows enough interest to ask for a reschedule. But I wonder how should I respond to this, I don't want to let her off with an easy "Okay no problem". I want her to learn that this behavior wont be accepted next time.

Author:	thumper858 [ Wed May 11, 2011 9:27 pm ]
Post subject:
If a girl flakes and doesn't reschedule then you drop them. If they reschedule then they're interested. I say reschedule the date. Just tell her that she's gonna have to make it up to you.

Author:	Glaive [ Wed May 11, 2011 10:23 pm ]
Post subject:
I agree with thumper. Get her to make it up to you, make her work for your time. After all you're a busy man and she's one of many girls that you have on the go

Author:	GKS [ Thu May 12, 2011 2:34 am ]
Post subject:
Here's the update, I didn't answer her txt, and 2 hours later she txted me again: Her: I was supposed to be out of town today but had to re-do my schedule. 30 min later: Me: Sure, we can reschedule. You're gonna cook me something to make it up Her: Hahahha. Nope. Me: sigh And here I am, hoping someday I would find a cute girl with dimples who is good at cooking. (she has dimples) Her: Well you found the dimples ... lol. I'm not saying im a bad cook but im not the best. Me: And she just said "nope" Finding her doppelganger will be hard. Wish me luck ! Her: What ?! hahah Me: Since you wont, Ima find your doppelganger to cook for me then. Her (20 min later ): Ummm. Ok try that and let me know how it works out. I got a feeling she took that joke too seriously. And throw this shit test at me. Her frame was different than the usual. So I just laughed it off with: Me: Definitely. Have fun dimples, I'll catch you later I can use some input about the conversation. I want to add that I gamed her online, and that day 2 will be the first time we meet in person, that probably explains why the whole cook for me thing didn't work out so well.

Author:	T-Bones [ Thu May 12, 2011 2:50 am ]
Post subject:
I concur. An attempt to reschedule means she's interested. But, your texts sound cheesy. I'm a proponent of no texting or very little. It gives them too much wiggle room and a leash to keep you on. You're commenting too much on her physicality and cuteness way too soon. Let her be interested in you. You be the prize. You should have said something like, "You're on probation." I don't like the you can make it up to me angle. Go out for a cup of coffee not an in-house cookfest. You haven't even't met this girl yet. There's too much chit chat. Make the date and get out of there until you meet. The probation line works better face to face with a grin too. Never talk about the future either. Let there be mystery and wonder if she'll see or hear from you again. Don't say, "I'll see you later." or "I'll catch you later." or "I'll call you tomorrow.". Drives chicks crazy.

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Author:	GKS [ Thu May 12, 2011 3:05 am ]
Post subject:
Quote: I concur. An attempt to reschedule means she's interested. But, your texts sound cheesy. I'm a proponent of no texting or very little. It gives them too much wiggle room and a leash to keep you on. You're commenting too much on her physicality and cuteness way too soon. Let her be interested in you. You be the prize. You should have said something like, "You're on probation." I don't like the you can make it up to me angle. Go out for a cup of coffee not an in-house cookfest. You haven't even't met this girl yet. There's too much chit chat. Make the date and get out of there until you meet. The probation line works better face to face with a grin too. Never talk about the future either. Let there be mystery and wonder if she'll see or hear from you again. Don't say, "I'll see you later." or "I'll catch you later." or "I'll call you tomorrow.". Drives chicks crazy. Thank for your input T-Bones, yea I realized I should have something more casual than cooking for me. And you're right to about commenting on her cuteness, I didn't even realize that. However, I normally use "I'll catch you later" or "i'll txt you later on" for reverse psychology, I actually never do until couple days later, but it makes them anticipate it and start to wonder why haven't I contact them yet. I'll definitely try the probation line next time around.

Author:	thumper858 [ Thu May 12, 2011 3:09 am ]
Post subject:
Quote: I concur. An attempt to reschedule means she's interested. But, your texts sound cheesy. I'm a proponent of no texting or very little. It gives them too much wiggle room and a leash to keep you on. You're commenting too much on her physicality and cuteness way too soon. Let her be interested in you. You be the prize. You should have said something like, "You're on probation." I don't like the you can make it up to me angle. Go out for a cup of coffee not an in-house cookfest. You haven't even't met this girl yet. There's too much chit chat. Make the date and get out of there until you meet. The probation line works better face to face with a grin too. Never talk about the future either. Let there be mystery and wonder if she'll see or hear from you again. Don't say, "I'll see you later." or "I'll catch you later." or "I'll call you tomorrow.". Drives chicks crazy. DUDE! We really need to hang out! Either that or stop reading my mind! I usually use "you're on time out"

Author:	T-Bones [ Thu May 12, 2011 3:24 am ]
Post subject:
Quote: Quote: I concur. An attempt to reschedule means she's interested. But, your texts sound cheesy. I'm a proponent of no texting or very little. It gives them too much wiggle room and a leash to keep you on. You're commenting too much on her physicality and cuteness way too soon. Let her be interested in you. You be the prize. You should have said something like, "You're on probation." I don't like the you can make it up to me angle. Go out for a cup of coffee not an in-house cookfest. You haven't even't met this girl yet. There's too much chit chat. Make the date and get out of there until you meet. The probation line works better face to face with a grin too. Never talk about the future either. Let there be mystery and wonder if she'll see or hear from you again. Don't say, "I'll see you later." or "I'll catch you later." or "I'll call you tomorrow.". Drives chicks crazy. DUDE! We really need to hang out! Either that or stop reading my mind! I usually use "you're on time out" Do you live in Southern California?

Author:	thumper858 [ Thu May 12, 2011 3:25 am ]
Post subject:
Murrieta, CA... about an hour north of San Diego...

Author:	T-Bones [ Thu May 12, 2011 3:31 am ]
Post subject:
Quote: Murrieta, CA... about an hour north of San Diego... I'm in Del Mar in North County. I'm leaving for Oklahoma for 18 months for a Master's degree and right now I'm in Mississippi for work, but keep in touch. I just got back into this forum.

Author:	thumper858 [ Thu May 12, 2011 3:34 am ]
Post subject:
Quote: I'm in Del Mar in North County. I'm leaving for Oklahoma for 18 months for a Master's degree and right now I'm in Mississippi for work, but keep in touch. I just got back into this forum. Dude, I'm originally from MS. Grew up there! I'll PM you my email for facebook or something..

Author:	thumper858 [ Thu May 12, 2011 3:36 am ]
Post subject:
Sorry for hijacking your thread!

Author:	T-Bones [ Thu May 12, 2011 3:46 am ]
Post subject:
Quote: Quote: I'm in Del Mar in North County. I'm leaving for Oklahoma for 18 months for a Master's degree and right now I'm in Mississippi for work, but keep in touch. I just got back into this forum. Dude, I'm originally from MS. Grew up there! I'll PM you my email for facebook or something.. I'm in Oxford at the moment. Ton's of hot chicks for gaming, but it's way too conservative vs. SoCal. All these girls want a ring. You can't really let loose. The gentleman approach seems to be the thing that gets them hot here, and I'm just not into that. Its a totally different story in San Diego as I'm sure you can agree. Shoot me an email. I'm not into Facebook.

Author:	The Designer [ Thu May 12, 2011 10:04 am ]
Post subject:
Making jokes via text that include information that she may not understand is not a great approach. I consider myself a relatively knowledgeable person and I have a vague idea of what a doppelganger is. Lay off the cute comments. Put her on time out. This is a perfect time to open up the negs and remind her that she fucked up, BUT in a very light manner. Don't be mean about it, tease about it.

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Author:	GKS [ Tue May 17, 2011 1:46 am ]
Post subject:
Updating... So I haven't talked to her since Wed. Yesterday, I contacted her to reschedule our date, she said Tues or Thurs should be fine. Me: Tuesday sounds better for me. No response till today, I txted her again earlier to confirm so I can make plans. Me: Are we down for Tuesday ? I want to know so I can make plans. Her: Yea that works for me. Me: Don't forget you're still on probation from last time. Her: Haha. Ok Me: Btw, don't start smiling all day. Your coworkers gonna blame me again ! She responded 8 hours later with this crap: Her: Soooooo My schedule changed The 2nd text 2 sec after the first one Her: I won't be in town tomorrow. Now we all know at this point her excuse is bullshit. I think it's time to freeze her ass out, but I want to at least call her out so she knows her behavior is unacceptable first. I haven't replied her yet. Inputs are welcome.