| PUA Forum https://www.pick-up-artist-forum.com/ |
|
| INTERVIEWS WITH PUA 1: K https://www.pick-up-artist-forum.com/viewtopic.php?f=6&t=87807 |
Page 1 of 1 |
| Author: | flowofsoma.com [ Thu Mar 17, 2011 3:22 pm ] |
| Post subject: | INTERVIEWS WITH PUA 1: K |
K is 26 years old. He has been living in Berlin for 1.5 years and is studying business administration. I have known K for about eight months. We have gone out together many times and become close friends as well. K is not a Pickup Guru, but he has solid game when he is ‘on’ he can be very good. flowofsoma: Can you tell us a bit about your background. So, I’ll start by telling my story. In the past I used to be terrible with women. I was glad if one even looked at me. I found my way to seduction when I was 23 years old and accidentally found a product by David DeAngelo about Body Language. I was shocked! I simply never had had the idea before that body language could have something to do with attracting women. I had no idea who DeAngelo was and he went right into describing the human mating ritual. I was fascinated and became very curious. At that time I had been working for two months for a publishing company. I was the new shy guy there. So after watching these videos I started trying some of the stuff out. I also studied his material on ‘cocky comedy’. I couldn’t believe the effect it had. Within three days my image in the company changed completely. All of a sudden, I was perceived as this funny, challenging guy. Women started viewing me very differently. I only had to go walk to the kitchen and their eyes were following me. At the time I had only been with one woman. That was four years earlier, when I was nineteen and was with a woman for about a month. Nothing afterward. One instance I remember well. I was with a colleague who was interested in me. We were walking to the bus and I was trying so hard to be relaxed and use some of this cocky comedy stuff and get my body language right. Constantly trying to remember what De Angelo had said. I went on a few dates with that colleague although that didn’t go anywhere in the end. But a whole new world opened up for me. I started to realize that all of this was in my hands and this impressed me deeply. So I started devouring a huge amount of pickup products. There was another event that influenced me a lot during that time. I got into a fight that ended badly for me and could even have ended even much worse. This event made it clear to me that I had neither been living consciously nor healthily. So I started paying attention to my mental health, my physical health. I started working on everything and tried to develop some goals and a vision. At some point, I started taking Salsa classes with a friend of my roommate. Salsa turned out to be important too. It was great to get comfortable with physical contact. A friend of my roommate’s was my dance partner and after a few weeks she became my girlfriend. This lasted for two years and was also important for me. I became more relaxed. I also resumed contact with my father again, after no contact for two years. Today I have a very good relationship with my father. Even when I was in my relationship, I kept working on my skills to some extent. I flirted sometimes and there were instances when I was close to sleeping with other women, but fidelity was very important to me at the time. After two years we moved in together and that didn’t go too well, so I broke up with her. We are still in contact and have sex sometimes, but it is not a relationship like it was before. When the relationship with my girlfriend ended, about a year ago, I really started to work on this. I did a workshop called ‘Silver Level Edition’ by Progressive Seduction. I knew all the theory already, but to have someone experienced give you tasks and push you to approach was something new. I went past my limits, looked for wings, went out with them. Slowly, I started getting better and finding my own style. How would you define your style? I suppose it’s closest to ‘Natural Game’. I focus a lot on logistics and my personal state, which is absolutely crucial. Appearance, fashion, exercise. Then, I think, common sense is important. What I mean is that I try to get the most effect with the least effort. I have been doing martial arts (Jeet Kune Do) for six months and this has influenced my game as well. The aim of this martial art is to have most effect with the least effort. I observe the environment, evaluate the situation, judge whether it is worth it or not. Sometimes I have a low sex-drive, then it is very difficult to create attraction and sexual tension. On other days, when I’m full of testosterone, it is much, much easier. The hormones affect your behavior, they affect how you are perceived. Do you have any methods to get into a better state? I tried out lots of things. Action mantras, self-talk. What I realized is that it is very difficult for me to affect my momentary state. So, if it’s not there, it’s not there. However, I do work on long-term things to affect the baseline of that state. I go out much less now than I used to at the same time I have much more success. Hormones are super important here. Increasing your testosterone level helps a great deal. Exercise and nutrition are super important. Another thing that is extremely important is to have a vision in life. A big long-term goal that you are excited about and that you work on. What do you do to increase your testosterone level? I exercise, I take some supplements. I also eat a SPAM diet. I’m not a nutrition expert, but regardless of what diet you end up choosing, I think it is crucial that you read about this area and put some serious thought into it. Where do you like approaching? One place that doesn’t work too well for me is clubs. Logistics are difficult, there is a lot of competition. It takes too much energy for me to have success there and that is just not worth it. I have good success at bars, especially during the week. And then I might meet women in the street, at my university, or in my social circle. Is there a pattern to your pickups? Yes. There are two things I pay attention to. Sometimes, it’s just one of them, other times they complement each other. First, I try to establish an emotional connection. I try to find topics where I am comfortable with and that she can relate to. I talk about experiences I’ve had and I listen to her. The more she talks, the more she invests in me and that creates attraction. Second, I am very sexual and dominant. I am more playful there and I often say sexually ambiguous things. I use eye contact also to create sexual tension. There is no real pattern to how fast I end up having sex. Sometimes it happens super fast and I’m surprised myself. Other times it takes much longer. What do you think was the most important factor in your development? There were different stages and during each different things were important. The first stage was being with my ex-girlfriend. Second, was the phase of approaching women, getting rejected, going out a lot. The third phase, for me was about dropping a lot of the theory I had studied and finding my own way. Did you ever think of giving up? I never wanted to give up completely. The most difficult phase was when I lost my confidence in a lot of the pickup theory. I fell into a bit of a crisis and started doubting everything. Looking back that was necessary. But I never gave up believing in my own progress and development and I think that was important. What books, material influenced you a lot? I mentioned David DeAngelo. Later Bad Boy was important too, cause I saw that there is a simpler, more direct way that resonated a lot with me. Looking back, would you have done anything differently? Yes and no. I should have started much earlier. Especially being in contact with women. That is more important than anything. Otherwise, I think every step I made and every experience I had was necessary and appropriate at the time. Is there something you think of as your greatest success? I am proud not about any event, but about the change I made. There is an enormous difference between who I am today and who I was four years ago. Of course, I’m far from the end of my dreams, but I did make a big step. Are there any downsides to your journey? Yes, now that I think of it…I often missed opportunities I had with women because I was trying hard to follow some theory when I could just have been normal. A thing I regret even more is that when I started having success I wanted to convince a lot of friends about pickup. I was a bit of a missionary and lost a lot of friends this way. What would you recommend someone starting out? I would tell you to look into the mirror and ask yourself: ‘Are you the guy that a woman just has to look at to get wet from?’ If the answer is no, which it will probably be. DO SOMETHING. Find your problems and work on them. There is no excuse not to try to improve yourself. Work on your appearance. Your clothing and especially your body. Looks are important and anyone who says otherwise is full of shit. You have to work on different areas at the same time. Because success in one area will help you in other areas as well. Being financially stable, having a good career, etc. All these things help. So myself four years ago I would pull on his ears and kick his ass and tell him that there without suffering there will be no success. No pain, no gain. What are the things that you want to work on in the future? I had lots of detours in my life and now my primary focus is graduating from university. To be successful professionally and financially is the most important goal for me at the moment. Where do you see yourself in five years when it comes to women? In five years, I want to have all the options that I want. I want to be able to choose what kind of relationships I have with what kind of women. I don’t believe that I will be fucking Angelina Jolie while Brad Pitt is watching. But I want to feel that there is no limit to my choice. What’s your view on monogamy, open relationships etc? At the moment, I am not monogamous and I couldn’t be. When I was monogamous too, it wasn’t completely satisfying. Perhaps that was also because it was really my first girlfriend. Now I still feel that there is too much out there that I want to experience for monogamy to be an option. If I’ll ever be monogamous, I have no idea. At the moment, I’m far away from it. Do you have any sort of system when it comes to relationships? Not really. I don’t have a hierarchy or something like that. I do have a woman I care more about, just because I have known her for much longer, but that’s all. I’m quite open here. Should I fall in love at some point, that is not something that I’d try to prevent. If it happens, I would welcome that too. I don’t have any more questions. What question should I have asked that I didn’t? (thinks)… One thing I would recommend is not do any crazy magic tricks, but be a normal person and work on yourself for the long term. One should also have value and principles that are independent of your success with women. I think that is very important. You could have asked me: ‘Are there things that are more important than success with women?’ For me that is friendship and loyalty among friends. That is more important for me. _____________ flowofsoma. com |
|
| Page 1 of 1 | All times are UTC |
| Powered by phpBB® Forum Software © phpBB Group http://www.phpbb.com/ |
|