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| Author: | Nyseto [ Thu Jan 20, 2011 10:11 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Was this a good answer? |
Ever since I left my girlfriend and trying to get her back (she cried a lot), she's been opening up to me and getting closer, but treating me like shit and commanding me to do things. She said, "Draw something for me." And she would say other things like, "Send it to me bitch" and stuff. I've been begging her to talk to me, etc. In relationships you sometimes have to become an AFC, you got no choice. Anyways, I told her this: "I can draw something for you, but I'm not your dog. I know what I did was wrong and it hurt you, but at the same time I still respect myself for who I am and it's not my problem if you don't like it." |
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| Author: | mobrinks [ Thu Jan 20, 2011 10:13 pm ] |
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"In relationships you sometimes have to become an AFC, you got no choice." Wrong. Honestly, your best move would be to tell her that if this is how she intends to treat you, she's not worth your time. Then break off contact. If she wants you, she'll come back. |
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| Author: | Nyseto [ Thu Jan 20, 2011 10:15 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
You may say I'm crazy but even in movies like Gone With The Wind where you got the perfect example of an alpha male, he still has his AFC times because he loves the woman. He'd cry and get on his knees and stuff but when everything was all good, he'd take the dominant role. |
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| Author: | mobrinks [ Thu Jan 20, 2011 10:20 pm ] |
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And I saw in The Town that you rob Fenway Park pretty easy and then bang the girl you kidnapped. Because MOVIES mean it's true.  Yes, there comes a time in every relationship where you need to be soft, and open up with a girl. There's no point in pretending you're not in love with a girl that says it right back... if any one does that, I feel sorry for him. But this girl called you HER BITCH, and you're letting it happen. Doesn't exactly sound like a healthy relationship to me. |
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| Author: | Nyseto [ Thu Jan 20, 2011 10:28 pm ] |
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You couldn't be more right. Thing is I love this girl even if she has her flaws, I don't feel like not spending my time with her. I just have to enforce my dominant role regardless of wanting her back, so that's why I gave her that response. I read that alpha males enforce themselves or walk away when they are disrespected. I would get mad for pointless reasons before but this time she called me her bitch (indirectly) so you're right, I'm not gonna let this girl treat me how she wants. |
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| Author: | mobrinks [ Thu Jan 20, 2011 10:30 pm ] |
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Getting back to the response... I DO like it. I don't want to pry into your relationship, but if you really think this girl is worth it... well, it's a dangerous game you're playing. Once she can step on you once, she's going to try it again and again. You're going to have to be ready to continually reinforce YOUR frame. I'm curious - did she respond?b |
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| Author: | Nyseto [ Thu Jan 20, 2011 10:34 pm ] |
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Nope, not yet. I've been constantly sending messages because ever since I confessed that I love her and miss her and that I was sorry for what I did, she got her revenge to block me and ignore me. But she would still occasionally respond back. The girl is a bit two-faced. Once I came back for her and told her how I still liked her for who she is, she put her status up as "Out to explore" even though she's still single. When I first met her I was a bit far from alpha male. So I would often get mad easily and she mentioned "I love getting you mad (:" but this time I learned new stuff. I mean even if she acts like she doesn't care about me anymore, she still reacts and says things to try and make me feel bad. Just last week when I told her she's cool and that I'm going to move on and wanting to keep in touch she said, "There's nothing. Bye." However, she responded for the first time since then yesterday and today to some of my messages. |
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| Author: | mobrinks [ Thu Jan 20, 2011 10:38 pm ] |
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I really think your best bet is completely drop all further contact for at least a week and see what she does. |
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| Author: | Nyseto [ Thu Jan 20, 2011 10:41 pm ] |
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Quote: I really think your best bet is completely drop all further contact for at least a week and see what she does.
I have been thinking of doing the following. I kept sending her messages on facebook even though she deleted me and surprisingly she didn't block me on it like she did on instant messenger, etc. She obviously craves the attention. She didn't respond to 17 of my messages she said she didn't read any of them and deleted them) but on my 18th one where I mentioned that I'm going to move on and wanting to keep in stuff, she responded saying, "There's nothing, bye." She spotted something in my message to make me feel bad about and she took the opportunity without realizing that she just responded and did the opposite of what she said.
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| Author: | mobrinks [ Thu Jan 20, 2011 10:43 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
17?  Yeah man, drop ALL contact. Forget about her. Even if she does come back (I don't think she will) I would approach with a ten mile pole. |
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| Author: | Nyseto [ Thu Jan 20, 2011 11:01 pm ] |
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She responded to what I told her about me not being her: "I can draw something for you, but I'm not your dog. I know what I did was wrong and it hurt you, but at the same time I still respect myself for who I am and it's not my problem if you don't like it." Her: "Then don't do it." Me: I didn't say I didn't want to, you didn't get my point. I'm finally starting to get her to talk to me, and this is where I am going to drop all contact. |
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| Author: | EddieFews [ Thu Jan 20, 2011 11:28 pm ] |
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Does she deserve the picture? If not just say "no" If she's acting that way then don't reward her??... She'll only keep doing it. Ignore her behavior, if she persists.. just stand up to her. Be the man Don't let anyone treat you like shit. ANYONE; espescially your girlfriend. She's suppose to love you. If not, kick her to the curb an find someone better. |
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| Author: | Nyseto [ Thu Jan 20, 2011 11:59 pm ] |
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When she said, "Send it to me bitch." I replied: "I'm not your bitch, learn something called respect first and it will be much easier getting along. But from that I guess you're not worth what I thought you were." Major disqualifier. |
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| Author: | EddieFews [ Fri Jan 21, 2011 12:05 am ] |
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Quote: When she said, "Send it to me bitch." I replied:
Promise me you'll ignore her next time..."I'm not your bitch, learn something called respect first and it will be much easier getting along. But from that I guess you're not worth what I thought you were." Major disqualifier. Everything doesnt need a response. If a little 3 year old kid walked up to you an called you a bitch would you respond, or walk away? An honestly ask yourself if this is worth the trouble |
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| Author: | Nyseto [ Fri Jan 21, 2011 12:20 am ] |
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She then said: Okay then stop emailing me cause your wasting both of our time. I then said: Nah, you're wasting mine actually. I still love you but you choose to disrespect me by calling me "bitch" as if I'm your bitch. Sorry, but this time you're the opposite of what I look for in a girl so might as well keep me blocked so you don't have to come on to me anymore. Long ago she told me, "You're the opposite of what I look for in a guy." And she blocked me on messenger a month ago. ***Didn't see your post when I responded to her again. She responded: "Bye" Me: No response this time |
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