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First date
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Author:  bowlie [ Fri Jan 14, 2011 9:44 pm ]
Post subject:  First date

Ok pretty inexperienced but a friend of A femal friend started txting me. We agreed to meet up but I don't know what to do there. I wanted
To meet up around friends first so I could use social proof, flirting and be able to talk to them if the Convo dries up. But sadly that didnt happen some are going for coffee in a few days.

My first sticking point is to not pay for her coffee. I know you shouldn't, but how
Should you do it without sounding like a tool? Secondly how important is
It to keep the date short? People say not to spend more than 45 mins on a first date , but is that important? Lastly can I try and k-close on a first date? Thanks

Author:  Lucky D [ Sat Jan 15, 2011 12:30 am ]
Post subject: 

coffee's only a dollar or two, its not a big deal to pay for it.

I dont know who says to keep the first date short... a 5 hour date seems perfect to me, it allows to go to different venues and take time to board subjects. Also, it builds comfort.. chek out “Mini-dating“

if you sense the good tension or attraction, yes you can k-close on a first date! pple k-close 1st date all the time :D

matter a fact, pple f-close on 1st dates. the sky's the limit!

Author:  Jagermaster [ Sat Jan 15, 2011 5:32 pm ]
Post subject: 

its not too important about the coffee...if you buy it you can always say something like, 'you can get the next one'..affirming a second meeting..

if you really dont want to pay..just be 5 mins late and she'll probably have already got hers.

i wouldnt plan in terms of time, just see how it flows...you might end up talking passionately for hours..if its going like this, you hardly want to cut it off..maybe plan some other cool places you could go for a walk or something cheap and fun afterwards if its going well and you both aren't busy.... my last 1st date lasted 2 days! comedy night, bar, fclose at hers, she pulled a sicky and watched films with me all day, dinner, bar, overnight again, then home!

again kclose..i wouldnt think about it now..does it matter? if it feels right, go for it..hey you're the alpha man..you might not want to kiss her, only give her a kiss if she is cool and deserves a kiss from you!

Author:  Jagermaster [ Sat Jan 15, 2011 5:33 pm ]
Post subject: 

let me know how it goes dude!

Author:  bowlie [ Sat Jan 15, 2011 6:10 pm ]
Post subject: 

thanks guys. the idea behind keeping it short is
1- thats before the convo has a chance to die off so she reembers you at your best
2- makes you seem more alpha. you have things to see and people to do. you dont need her. the date is for her not you.
3- she will wonder if she did something wrong and try real hard to impress next time.

i dont think its about the money, i think its about setting boundarys. you are someone she can go out with and have fun with. but your not going to buy her shit and take her out for meals. you dont need to.

anyway thanks guys. i got her saying how much shes looking forward to it now. just hope i dont disapoint on the day.

Author:  Don Draper [ Sat Jan 15, 2011 6:41 pm ]
Post subject: 

Coffee's pretty cheap. Pay for it. Don't pay for anything else though.

Keep it light,tease her, include playful banter. Keep the negging under control.

Act as if you've been on such things a million times and its no big deal. Its an alpha trait.

Talk about stuff other than her too. She'll think you've got something going in your life and it keeps you occupied.

Timing is well,3-4 hours is a good time period for a coffee date.

Kiss close is pretty normal and she'll be up for it if you a great time. Don't hesitate and observe her subtle signs.

All the best,man. Do well.

Author:  bowlie [ Sun Jan 16, 2011 5:47 pm ]
Post subject: 

went well, thanks for the advice. she invited me to hers next week so....

Author:  Jagermaster [ Sun Jan 16, 2011 6:04 pm ]
Post subject: 

awesome well done mate...did you kiss her or make her wait til next week ;-) ?

Author:  bowlie [ Sun Jan 16, 2011 10:22 pm ]
Post subject: 

Lol I like the phrase 'make her wait' let's go with that ;) I think she is just very shy, she didn't open up properly for a while. Next time.

Author:  carlosdrr [ Sun Jan 16, 2011 11:37 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: First date

Some people might disagree with me but don't pay for the coffee, it will make her feel uneasy...and getting laid is about making the girl comfortable with you.

Before the date..have some flirty stories ready (make some up if you dont have any)
When buying the coffee, just tell her...Ill get mine first, or you get your first.

then sit her and talk....

as long as you see she is not bored..then keep the convo going (you can always say things like "I think I should leave" and her reaction will let you know if she is having fun or not)

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