well i live in a small town, but i traveled a bit to a larger town. still felt like a ghost town. cant wait till im at uni next year
any thoughts on good books about attraction? thanks
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| Author: | bowlie [ Mon Dec 20, 2010 12:49 pm ] |
| Post subject: | day sarging problems |
ok i went out xmas shopping today and promised myself i would approach any HB i saw. i didnt see one. not a single one. england sucks, so where good places to go day sarging? i presumed the mall would be great. my second problem is i was just practicing opening. i have no idea what to o next. is there a good book on attraction or something i can read. i am not sure where to look for one. thanks |
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| Author: | zigzag40 [ Mon Dec 20, 2010 1:06 pm ] |
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Hi Bowlie, I'm new to the game so please take my advice with a pinch of salt but here it is anyway. If you are just practicing openers why are you only going for HBs? If you are outcome independant then it doesnt matter who you open and therefore it doesnt matter what happens. Its practice and with practice comes the confidence and with confidence comes material that can be used....... I would stay away from canned material in the day game and use natural. Zigzag |
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| Author: | Ryan Black SashaPUA [ Mon Dec 20, 2010 1:59 pm ] |
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Where the hell are you going? Oxford circus, topshop, selfridges, etc. are teaming with hot girls right now! |
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| Author: | salad_fingers [ Mon Dec 20, 2010 2:37 pm ] |
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Depends where in the UK you are. If you are in some small town in commuter-land then no wonder it sucked. If you are in London or any big city your options should be much greater. Or indeed anywhere with a high percentage of students. |
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| Author: | bowlie [ Mon Dec 20, 2010 3:54 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
well i live in a small town, but i traveled a bit to a larger town. still felt like a ghost town. cant wait till im at uni next year any thoughts on good books about attraction? thanks
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| Author: | J-Diddy [ Mon Dec 20, 2010 5:08 pm ] |
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A lot of it is all about improv. Forget the pick up books for now. Okay your at the grocery store your waiting in line there is a pretty cashier doing her thing... Oh man what do I say!!!? oh wait I know... I'm going to use my surroundings, lets see what I've got to use (looking around) (Hey there is a guy next to me that just put some dip and chips on the grocery conveyor belt, he looks friendly... I'll talk to him) ME: So is that lunch or dinner? HIM:Haha Oh man, my neices b-day party (or what ever) ME: Yea I've got one too she always does this or that. HIM: bla bla bla (just keep the convo toward some thing peronal) Soon enough that cashier is going to want to chime in or you can just include her by asking what she thinks. Boom... a seem less transition. And no, you don't have to close her within that small window. You can always go back there and talk again because you know where she will be. Being on your toes and having witt gets you ++++ |
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| Author: | bowlie [ Mon Dec 20, 2010 5:22 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
well thats the kind of thing i was hoping to do. i dont have any routines or anything planned. i just dont know what im aiming for after i open. i meen to begin with it is to get her talking. then after that i guess to make her attracted to me. then close. but i have no idea what to do to make her attracted, so i just talk small talk. i guess im hopeing there is a formula that works for every girl wich obviously isnt there. but it would be nice. |
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| Author: | J-Diddy [ Mon Dec 20, 2010 7:30 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
Hey there ya go. You just wrote down the begining to the "secret formula". "small talk" that's all it is... building rapport. but there are a few talking points to stay away from: -work -weather unless it out of the ordinary -drama unless you already know her -politics -racism -self deprecating humor, unless you just want to be friends |
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| Author: | bowlie [ Mon Dec 20, 2010 8:38 pm ] |
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ok cool. i hear things about building raport, comfort, kino. what kind of thing do you do? just try and work these things into small talk? |
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| Author: | J-Diddy [ Tue Dec 21, 2010 8:44 pm ] |
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Well bowlie, I'm assuming that you are new to most of this... which is great because you want to keep it as simple as you can to start. The less "pick-up" material floating around in your head the better. So I will give you the "low down" on the basis of any good relationship: BUILDING RAPPORT, it is all about getting and giving personal information. Talk to everyone, start a conversation with someone new everyday on your lunch break or when ever you have free time. Lead these conversations into positive subjects and ask personal questions. Just consider it an experiment in human nature (yours, and theirs) and have fun with it. That's the essence of pickup - just having fun playing with the other kids in the sandbox. Some will be excited to play, some will be cautious and take a bit to warm up and share their toys, some will be grouchy because they need a diaper change or a bottle. Whatever. Don't sweat it. Just work on being YOUR BEST SELF and the rest will fall into place as it should. Oh yea and make sure to write down all your conversations... this is a huge help because you can go back and look at which ones were successful and see the feed-back from persons you where talking with. |
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| Author: | LD [ Tue Dec 21, 2010 9:19 pm ] |
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Quote: well thats the kind of thing i was hoping to do. i dont have any routines or anything planned. i just dont know what im aiming for after i open. i meen to begin with it is to get her talking. then after that i guess to make her attracted to me. then close. but i have no idea what to do to make her attracted, so i just talk small talk. i guess im hopeing there is a formula that works for every girl wich obviously isnt there. but it would be nice.
Hi man. first off: Quote:
Don't sweat it. Just work on being YOUR BEST SELF and the rest will fall into place as it should.
I think this is excellent advice. i want to add to that: if you dont know what you are aiming for, you aint going to get far nor learn anything. Your goal should be the same, anytime, anywhere. But its not because you did not reach your goal, you werent successful. If you had a few girls opened and had some sort of conversation with them, you should be a happy man. But never wonder aimlessly around, doing random stuff. Actually, practicing opening is pointless unless you are afraid of people. Then you can go outside, ask 100 people what time it is, and you practiced opening. On this practicing thing: I know what you mean with: it sucks if there arent any hb's around, so you can 'practice' on ugly girls. I think that is rubbish. This idea of 'result independent' is not good. Being 'result independant' (which IMO is a good concept but expressed wrong) is actually the thing you need to learn in PU. When you go to an ugly girl 'just to practice' what you should say, that is not practice. You go to her and you have nothing to lose. You absolutely dont care if she will respond or not EVEN BEFORE YOU STARTED. How can this be practice if the feelings that will ruin your game (fear, anxiety, insecurity) are not there? What makes a good soldier? One that can aim good or one that can aim good while being shot at? The true art of pick up is being able to go to a woman you find attractive but dont really care if you will ever hook up or not. If you dont hook up, learn from it and move on. I wish you the best of luck ciao! |
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