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What would an alpha male do in this situation?
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Author:  Nyseto [ Fri Nov 12, 2010 1:38 am ]
Post subject:  What would an alpha male do in this situation?
I've been a jerk to this girl and she blocked me on facebook. She's been telling her friends that I'm a dick, etc. Before that, I drew a portrait of her, gave her a rose made out of a napkin, etc. as just sweet things, NOT meant to be AFC. I was also too slow with her and she already hooked up with someone else but at least I came somewhat clean without giving myself away that I actually wanted her. One of her friends told me she said, "Yeah he's a jerk, I have no idea why he did all those things for me." She keeps twisting it around though. She first thought I drew her to get into her pants, then she thought that I'm a desperate senior going for freshman, and now she doesn't know what to think anymore.

I'm confused between 3 things. The next time I see her, should I apologize? Should I ignore? Or should I just say hi? And about that third one...I gave her a nickname long ago which was "Sunshine" because of the way she would blush, so maybe saying, "Hey Sunshine" would be better?

She called me names on my facebook and my female friends cussed her out. After she blocked me, I texted her saying to just be friends and call it a truce but she didn't reply. Then I said to her, "Once a bitch always a bitch. With you I had to break my gentleman rule."
Author:  kasabi [ Fri Nov 12, 2010 2:26 am ]
Post subject: 
Forget the alpha/beta crap. Trying to be what you are not is messing you up big time. Try to be this, try to be that, not meant to be this, just to be sweet, don't give yourself away, like her too much, swear at her, apologize to her, etc, etc . . .

Listen senior man, you just got face palmed by a little freshman. Realize humility and calm the fuck down . . . and what's with swearing at a little kid? You are one of the several members on this forum who is probably not in position to be gaming anybody at this moment; you're just going to drive yourself and others to disappointment. Breathe, relax . . . There is definitely something wrong here but I can't figure it out. It could be something simple as reducing sugar intake or something far more complex.

If you don't solve this, you will forever push girls to crap all over you, so you can blame them for your negative situations, so you can piss them off, so you can feel guilty, so you can apologize and act creepy, so the girls can crap all over you, so you can blame them for your negative situations, so you can piss them off, so you can feel guilty, so you can apologize and act creepy, so the girls can crap all over you, so you can blame them for your negative situations, so you can piss them off, so you can feel guilty, so you can apologize and act creepy, so the girls can crap all over you, so you can blame them for your negative situations.

Isn't this a pain in the ass. . .
Author:  Nyseto [ Fri Nov 12, 2010 2:37 am ]
Post subject: 
I know man, I know. I messed up big time but learned so much. I'm just focused on how I can not look like an asshole to her. Her friends have been saying that she thinks I hate her. When my friend asked her to name 3 guys that don't like her, I was one of them.

I'm thinking of next time I see her, I'll just say, "What's up Alyce" and then grab her by her arm or shoulder and nodding my tilted head saying, "I don't hate anyone" and continuing in my own direction. No apologies, no more talking shit, no more chasing, just a simple hi like any normal person. It's about time I get there.

When I first met her, she was an HB10 and I thought, "Whoah, I need to pull out the big guns." So I truly was a dick to her for NO reason. EVEN her friends told me she said, "I don't get why he was a jerk to me at first." I was operating by a whole different strategy back then. The strategy to be an asshole, to have IMPACT.

I've been an AFC before...I've been an asshole before, now I'm in the middle. When you try something new, you kind of jump to the other end of the spectrum and fail again, but that time you learn your real spot.
Author:  maddan [ Fri Nov 12, 2010 3:13 am ]
Post subject: 
how are things going with Alyce now?
Author:  kasabi [ Fri Nov 12, 2010 3:43 am ]
Post subject: 
No, no . . . there's something more going on here. There's more to this than your little freshman girl and and your rep in school. I could have dissected every sentence in your first post but didn't want to rough your feathers too much.

My suggestion to STOP GAMING isn't a suggestion for you to shut yourself down or to shut you out. I simply think it would do you a lot of good to take some time off by removing the clutter in your life so you can focus on YOURSELF MORE. What do you have to lose?

1. What ever the hell you're doing now doesn't seem to be working any how. (Your game = do whatever you want to do and then label your actions with PU terminology. )
2. The problem is 'whatever you want to do' = a self propelling loop of crap.
3. You have the power to shift strategy.
4. In order to do shift, you'll need to find a "WAY IN" to a more positive and successful cycle of actions.
5. How will you do this WHILE you're in the cycle of shit?

Quote:
I'm thinking of next time I see her, I'll just say, "What's up Alyce" and then grab her by her arm or shoulder and nodding my tilted head saying, "I don't hate anyone" and continuing in my own direction.
Your trying to 'solve' a riddle that has no problem with a formula that has no basis.
Quote:
No apologies, no more talking shit, no more chasing, just a simple hi like any normal person. It's about time I get there.
Why the rush? Your rush is f'ing you up. Why are you trying to figure all of this out over night? Your assume too much.
Quote:
I was operating by a whole different strategy back then. The strategy to be an asshole, to have IMPACT.
So your strategy was to be a dick to her for NO reason? This is your impact?

Stop what ever it is that you think is "GAME". You seem comfortable with writing. . . so start writing. Write your game. Start from scratch. Go through the process. Write your openers, write your routines, write your closes, read them over, edit, revise, think of your scenarios, reactions. Create a flow chart.

Meanwhile, also keep a journal about your goals and your emotions. It doesn't have to be complex but you should try to write something . . . anything . . . everyday . . .

You'll know you're ready to try this out when won't feel nervous/anxious and lost as you do now.
Author:  urielpie [ Fri Nov 12, 2010 4:42 am ]
Post subject: 
wow ive heard of being a dick but thats just being a tool and a dbag. you need to work things out your going to go in a downward spiral of crap :P
Author:  ImNaShitFool [ Fri Nov 12, 2010 6:25 am ]
Post subject: 
you dont seem to understand the game...

i really dont see how drawing a portrait of her can not come off as afc...

Alpha is non reactive, uninvested (without first receiving investment), reserved, confident and in control

so being non reactive means not giving a fuck and just doing what you would do anyway cuz shes not the center of ur universe...

the way ur thinking is the opposite of that. your micromanaging and worrying about the little details too much, who cares.. be urself and have fun with whoevers around u, if its not her, ohhhhh well, shes the dumb ass for putting herself in that spot by blocking u...
Author:  Legit_ [ Fri Nov 12, 2010 8:19 am ]
Post subject: 
An alpha wouldn't have cared after she blocked you on Fbook. Unless you did something REALLY stupid, she's a crazy bitch and you should be on to the next.
Author:  Nyseto [ Fri Nov 12, 2010 11:22 am ]
Post subject: 
My friend and I at the beginning of the school year were gaming everyone. At a point he told me, "I'm done, don't try to pull shit in high school on girls bro." I kept my path. Led me to failure, he's had more success.

As far as this girl goes, it'll be like this. When I see her face, I'll just say hi and that's it.

Meanwhile, I just want to work on my actions, body language, posture, and all that.

I was being a bad boy at first because from what I've read because girls like "bad boys" which failed me
Author:  kasabi [ Fri Nov 12, 2010 5:57 pm ]
Post subject: 
Quote:
My friend and I at the beginning of the school year were gaming everyone.
Relax. There's plenty of time. You're going to figure this out sooner than most.
Quote:
Meanwhile, I just want to work on my actions, body language, posture, and all that.
Your WRITING is your WAY IN. This is your strength; make it work for you. Create your script for life. For game, here should be no "ALL THAT". Keep it simple; 3 categories: Open, Routine, Close. That's it. Write, it, read it, edit it, have fun with it, follow it.
Quote:
I was being a bad boy at first because from what I've read because girls like "bad boys" which failed me
This strategy failed because:

1. You're not truly an angry asshole.
2. And you're not Robert De Niro

I'm beginning to see a little pattern here. . . Look, there are many ways to run our little game. You could be the funny guy, imaginative artsy guy, etc . . . You could run dorky pick up games, repeat silly canned routines, etc . . . Yet you gravitated towards this funky asshole acting gig.

Your cycle of chaos begins by CREATING INTEREST. This is why I know you have game. You can do this. You already do it flawlessly. You have the ability to attract. If you end it here, all is well. However . . . after you CREATE a certain bond, you quickly create a negative barrier between you and your girl and PURPOSELY make yourself at fault. You even sent a henchman to ask and VERIFY that it's your fault so you can bask in the gelatinous ooze of guilt and anxiety. Then of course, you set yourself out to 'fix it'. Read your own writing. (ANYTHING that you write) You will likely see for yourself a cycle of sabotage, self vilification, misery, confession, and finally a strategy for redemption. These habits can last a lifetime, not just with women but with everything that you do.

Whoever withdrew their love for you when you were a kid. . . consider sending him/her your henchman and asking if it's your fault. Also consider arming your henchman with a throwing pie.
Author:  Nyseto [ Fri Nov 12, 2010 8:17 pm ]
Post subject: 
I asked one of my friends whose friends with her too just because I was curious. At first I was all confident feeling all tough and thinking that everything will work, but then I started to accept the failure more and more. Now with a different view, I look back on what I've said to her and it was just shooting myself in the foot like an idiot. I created attraction yes, I got her interest, she even asked me to come see her one day in the room where she had in school suspension. You're right though, I did set up a negative barrier on purpose so I could play hard and not act interested thinking that SHE will chase after me. I just wanted to show that I wasn't one of those nice guys and so it was taken way too far. And it's very true, I am not an angry asshole at all actually.

Here's what went down today. On my way to class, I saw her walking towards me to her own class and there were a lot of people around us as well. For 2 seconds or so, I said, "Hey Alyce" and she looked at me for a second and we kept going our ways. Later that day she was looking around for her bus while talking to some of her friends and I was talking to these other girls until me and her made eye contact from far away. After that, I didn't go up to her or anything, I just stayed there continuing to talk to the girls. I'm just going to let her simmer with that "Hi." I don't care if she forgives me or doesn't forgive me. One "Hi" is all I needed, I'm not going to keep greeting her. I just don't want to feel like a loser apologizing to her nor like an asshole like I was before by saying more shit to her. I just wanted to show I'm human. I do care about her but I don't care so much that I must actually have her. Whatever goes down is cool with me.

One of the girls I was talking to was another girl I was being an asshole to. We were having a friendly conversation with me teasing her and I was like, "Give me a hug" and she said, "No..I got injured." Then I said, "I'll give you a hug instead" and she said "No." Then another guy came who was her friend and they hugged in front of my face which I thought was a bitch move so now I'm not going to give her anymore attention and leave it at that until she does something. I asked her, "Are you mad at me because I messed up your hair with my hand 2 days ago on purpose?" And she said, "Omg, how do you remember that??" And I said, "I just do. Don't you remember things?" She said, "I don't remember anything."

That girl that refused to hug me but hugged her other male friend in front of my face actually liked me (I actually don't like her more than a friend) On facebook she sent me the message saying, "sooo. guess what?! i have never kissed a white guy before" trying to flirt with me because I logged out while in a flirty conversation with her. Today because of what she did, I decided to shut her down when before that my only intention was to neither take her nor reject her. So I responded back to that message with, "come on kelly...even I know you're gaming me. I think you've been getting the wrong idea lately. One day you told me through IM, "Hows that supposed to impress me?" I mean, why would I try to impress you, we're just friends ;D" It's because she doesn't see me as a friend and so she tends to take me more seriously and give me attitude as if I'm supposed to feel rejected whereas I see her as a friend inside and out. I just don't like how she treats me bad as if I'm supposed to be more than a friend for her, so I made it clear to her about the way I feel about HER. It wasn't exactly revenge, but I can feel that energy from her as if she wants something more.
Author:  ImNaShitFool [ Fri Nov 12, 2010 9:31 pm ]
Post subject: 
bro, if you got attraction ur half way there.. U just gotta learn how to play cat string theory game a little better..

like play hard to get, not just to build attraction, but to make her work for your validation...

when she gives enough ioi's reward her by giving a subtle one back... u dont have to be a die hard asshole 100% of the time...

I do the asshole thing alot and it works for me... But it does set up a wall that makes it hard to comfort build & get her to trust u... but what u can do is use the cat string to maybe throw qualification ioi's at her.. which will start chipping away at that wall u put up.. "Oh u do ___ I like girls who do that", u know?

And dont think so little picture.. think about the grand scheme of everything.. girls think with a group mentality.. if you win over the group, u'll win over the girl too.. make friends w. her friends.. and all the hot girls at ur school and get a reputation as the guy who knows evvvvverry girl and is soooo cool w. all of them.. then she'll really look and feel like a crazy bitch n she'll be right back.. trust..
Author:  kasabi [ Sat Nov 13, 2010 1:30 am ]
Post subject: 
Don't waste your writing energy with 'reviews'. Instead, create PREVIEWS and revise, revise, revise. Hopefully, you'll correct your habitual faults before you act upon them.
Author:  Tzinc [ Sat Nov 13, 2010 3:12 am ]
Post subject: 
Im not getting how you've been an asshole? maybe I just skimmed this whole post and didnt read that part. I want to hear a specific time! To me it seems like you are acting needy and not like an asshole at all or maybe you were gaming too many girls and thats what gave her the asshole vibe but then to defend yourself you became needy what you shouldve said is you cant make a good omlette without breaking some eggs and before you there were a hell of a lot of eggs and ask are we friends?
Author:  antic [ Sun Nov 14, 2010 2:40 am ]
Post subject: 
Simple answer: You shouldn't have told her that she is a bitch.

I think your problem is that you are not coming across as yourself. Just because you know pickup doesn't mean you can be an absolute arse and get away with it. Also treat girls with a little bit of respect and stop acting like you're heaps better than them.
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