PUA Forum :: What do I do? Is she flaking out ?

She's 28 lol
But that's what I was doing, sleeping with other girls. I do consider a LTR with this HB, that's why I'm being concerned and I wanted to know what did I do wrong so I can learn from it.
I already started to dragged out the time I replied to her txt to 1 or 2 hrs with short and bold txts, also stop using my nickname for her and call her name instead. ^^

Quote:

I don't believe you did anything wrong other than tolerating her shit. And the more you tolerate the more she will give.

Don't contact her for a week and see what happens. A girl who is interested will freak out if you stop talking to her for more than a few days. As fucked up as it is.. I use this as "punishment" when girls try to play with my head.

A woman's need for attention is as strong as a man's need for sex. But if she gets too much attention she loses respect. Cut off the attention and watch her freak out. If she doesn't freak out then she isn't that into you. Don't let her pull all the strings.

Thank for the advices guys.
After 5 days freeze-out, I specifically asked what's her schedule like this week ( i know, AFC moment), but i kinda had to since she has a crazy work schedule. But nothing worked out so far, no response from her so far.
I'm about tell her that this isn't working out if she can't even squeeze out couple hrs, and walk away

Should I do that to show that I'm willing to walk away or just ignore her from now on?

I found your advice very helpful Blondguy.

But yea I know I shouldn't ask that question, AFC moment.
She texted me her schedule for the week, I gotta stop giving her too much power on picking out the time thou.

Playherman, you're right on target, I didn't think about that at all, I guess I still have a lot to learn.
Let's say I put together some terms for women, and once they cross the line, do I call them out on it or just freeze out for couple days ? I've read the modification of behavior article, but it think it's much easier do apply those in person. But what do you do over the phone or through texting? I mean you don't have to delete them if they learn how to behave. I need some reading on this, if you guys know any useful tip, let me know.

Author:	GKS [ Thu Sep 09, 2010 10:57 pm ]
Post subject:	What do I do? Is she flaking out ?
I'm trying to figure out what did I do wrong here. We had an awesome first date, ended up making out. We continued to flirt for a while, then she texted me one night when she was drunk, the convo ended up about we gonna have sex on kitchen table. I asked her where she at, she flipped out and said that would be too easy. Then I played along and later on use that against her when she said she wanted to play with her toys while I strip for her. I told her that would be too easy. After couple days, I asked her to come out to hang out before she left for vacation, she said she had plan with her friends. She went on her 2 weeks vacation, I texted her once during that time. She got back, she usually texts me everyday, but she didn't contact me or anything for like 4-5 days. So I texted her yesterday, she stopped replying after a few exchanges. I texted her again today telling her to come out for some ice cream since I want to see her. She said she has to do cleaning. She showed quite lot of IOIs, I knew for sure she was interested but then all the same time she keeps flaking out on setting a date to meet up. I know she has a busy life, and i was kinda on short notice about the hangout. I just think if she's interested she could have put off cleaning the house for another day or so if she really wants to hang out.

Author:	PlayHer Man [ Thu Sep 09, 2010 11:16 pm ]
Post subject:
Yeah.. I'm pretty sure this girl is between ages 18 and 24 if not younger. Right? Thats your typical flaky female pulling a "shit test" on you. Young girls pull this crap a lot. They will be very easy in the beginning then start backing off and acting like a bitch to see how you will react. In other words: "Testing You". Its one of the female behaviors that really gets under my skin, but it is what it is. Anyway.. the best way to deal with it is to ignore her dumb ass and continue picking up and sleeping with other girls. I always say that until a relationship is offical and you are boyfriend and girlfriend... there is no reason to commit. Volume is key. When you have lots of women to choose from these issues rarely come up and when they do you wont notice because while she disappears for 2 weeks you are fucking another girl anyway. If dating multiple women isn't for you... then just use this time to do your own thing and hang out with friends. Don't kiss her ass and don't deal with her bullshit. She needs to know that you will leave if she doesn't know how to act.

Author:	GKS [ Thu Sep 09, 2010 11:29 pm ]
Post subject:
She's 28 lol But that's what I was doing, sleeping with other girls. I do consider a LTR with this HB, that's why I'm being concerned and I wanted to know what did I do wrong so I can learn from it. I already started to dragged out the time I replied to her txt to 1 or 2 hrs with short and bold txts, also stop using my nickname for her and call her name instead. ^^

Author:	PlayHer Man [ Thu Sep 09, 2010 11:50 pm ]
Post subject:
Quote: She's 28 lol But that's what I was doing, sleeping with other girls. I do consider a LTR with this HB, that's why I'm being concerned and I wanted to know what did I do wrong so I can learn from it. I already started to dragged out the time I replied to her txt to 1 or 2 hrs with short and bold txts, also stop using my nickname for her and call her name instead. ^^ I don't believe you did anything wrong other than tolerating her shit. And the more you tolerate the more she will give. Don't contact her for a week and see what happens. A girl who is interested will freak out if you stop talking to her for more than a few days. As fucked up as it is.. I use this as "punishment" when girls try to play with my head. A woman's need for attention is as strong as a man's need for sex. But if she gets too much attention she loses respect. Cut off the attention and watch her freak out. If she doesn't freak out then she isn't that into you. Don't let her pull all the strings.

Author:	Ryan Black SashaPUA [ Fri Sep 10, 2010 10:51 am ]
Post subject:
Quote: Quote: She's 28 lol But that's what I was doing, sleeping with other girls. I do consider a LTR with this HB, that's why I'm being concerned and I wanted to know what did I do wrong so I can learn from it. I already started to dragged out the time I replied to her txt to 1 or 2 hrs with short and bold txts, also stop using my nickname for her and call her name instead. ^^ I don't believe you did anything wrong other than tolerating her shit. And the more you tolerate the more she will give. Don't contact her for a week and see what happens. A girl who is interested will freak out if you stop talking to her for more than a few days. As fucked up as it is.. I use this as "punishment" when girls try to play with my head. A woman's need for attention is as strong as a man's need for sex. But if she gets too much attention she loses respect. Cut off the attention and watch her freak out. If she doesn't freak out then she isn't that into you. Don't let her pull all the strings. This is exactly correct. My only addition is that when you finally do contact her after the 2-3 day freeze-out, bring value to the table by not sending too many messages and keep her intrigued. Initial texts like "you'll never believe who I just met!" then when she gets back to you, following that with plans like "going to this secret party thursday, you can come but you have to bring a mask" means you're way less likely to get flakes.

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Author:	Rich123 [ Sat Sep 11, 2010 12:31 pm ]
Post subject:
Just an added note. In my experience, call more, text less. Calling will increase comfort and her emotional attachment to you. Calling is harder, your game needs to be better, but just practice and you'll get better. Calling = alpha (not every 20 minutes though) Too much texting = afc Good luck

Author:	GKS [ Tue Sep 14, 2010 10:10 pm ]
Post subject:
Thank for the advices guys. After 5 days freeze-out, I specifically asked what's her schedule like this week ( i know, AFC moment), but i kinda had to since she has a crazy work schedule. But nothing worked out so far, no response from her so far. I'm about tell her that this isn't working out if she can't even squeeze out couple hrs, and walk away Should I do that to show that I'm willing to walk away or just ignore her from now on?

Author:	PlayHer Man [ Wed Sep 15, 2010 12:28 am ]
Post subject:
Quote: Thank for the advices guys. After 5 days freeze-out, I specifically asked what's her schedule like this week ( i know, AFC moment), but i kinda had to since she has a crazy work schedule. But nothing worked out so far, no response from her so far. I'm about tell her that this isn't working out if she can't even squeeze out couple hrs, and walk away Should I do that to show that I'm willing to walk away or just ignore her from now on? NO.. don't tell her you are walking away unless you never want to come back. Just ignore her. I've done this many times and sometimes weeks, months or years later I'll run into that girl and catch up where we left off. Another thing you can do is tell her: "I want a woman who is ready for (insert what you want) and if we are not on the same page.. I'm going to have to move on". I've only told a girl to fuck off ONCE because she was a total tease and acted like a cunt when I called her out on it. But unless the girl is a total bitch.. its usually not necessary. Don't burn bridges unless you are 100% sure you will never want to cross them.

Author:	Ryan Black SashaPUA [ Wed Sep 15, 2010 12:25 pm ]
Post subject:
Did you read my post or just find something negative to say about it and reinforce what you already believe? After your freeze out, I said BRING VALUE. Who THE FUCK sends texts like "what r u doing?" - some guy who has FUCK ALL going on in their lives. Do you want to hang out with that person? NO. Why should she? And now you're giving her some ultimatum like she either makes time for you or you walk? WTF? You have no bargaining power and are coming from a position of ZERO value. I'm sure she'd be more than happy to not have anything to do with you ever again because you have absolutely no real connection with her at all. Freeze her out...again. Then ping her with texts that have value. "The most random thing just happened!" "In such a weird headspace right now...." "You'll never guess who I was told is DEFINITELY gay!" WAIT for her to get back to you. THEN later give her a little funny anecdote and invite her to something WORTH GOING TO, and say how fun it's gonna be and she HAS to come cuz it's been ages and you might have to de-friend her on lifebook. If you bring value, she will make time for you.

Author:	GKS [ Wed Sep 15, 2010 12:51 pm ]
Post subject:
I found your advice very helpful Blondguy. But yea I know I shouldn't ask that question, AFC moment. She texted me her schedule for the week, I gotta stop giving her too much power on picking out the time thou.

Author:	Wulver [ Wed Sep 15, 2010 2:04 pm ]
Post subject:
She either is very independent/busy, not into you enough or seeing another guy....or a variation of all. However you still have a fighting chance since obviously you have crossed the barrier into her personal intimacy based mindset at one point. I suspect she thinks she has summed you up based on your actions and conversations. Change things up...be totally unpredictable but not loony...be funny funny funny cocky calm cool and confident....dont sound needy ever again and you shall feast soon enough let her feel like talking and being with you is something she looks forward to...she is burnt out form her job and needs to be swept off her feet....learn to enjoy this practice

Author:	PlayHer Man [ Thu Sep 16, 2010 12:09 am ]
Post subject:
Quote: I found your advice very helpful Blondguy. But yea I know I shouldn't ask that question, AFC moment. She texted me her schedule for the week, I gotta stop giving her too much power on picking out the time thou. The KEY to dealing with women is having terms. Your main issue is you have no standards for female behavior... she can basically act however she wants and you'll put up with it. Fuck that. What you need to do is write down some TERMS for women. What you expect from women and how they should treat you. Then go hunting and the women who give you shit get DELETED and cut out of your life. Simple. Thats what I do. I've cut off so many women its not funny. I don't tolerate bullshit and thats why all my current relationships with women are non-toxic and low drama.

Author:	GKS [ Thu Sep 16, 2010 1:20 am ]
Post subject:
Playherman, you're right on target, I didn't think about that at all, I guess I still have a lot to learn. Let's say I put together some terms for women, and once they cross the line, do I call them out on it or just freeze out for couple days ? I've read the modification of behavior article, but it think it's much easier do apply those in person. But what do you do over the phone or through texting? I mean you don't have to delete them if they learn how to behave. I need some reading on this, if you guys know any useful tip, let me know.

Author:	Ryan Black SashaPUA [ Thu Sep 16, 2010 11:45 am ]
Post subject:
Reinforce and reward good behaviour, ignore or sometimes punish bad behaviour. Same as training a common animal. However, you need to get the point about bringing value to the table before you can actually start setting terms. If you're sending shitty "hey lets hang out sometime" messages, then you're gonna get ignored and there's nothing you can really say to make her stop ignoring you except actually be fucking interesting.

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Author:	PlayHer Man [ Fri Sep 17, 2010 12:23 am ]
Post subject:
Quote: Playherman, you're right on target, I didn't think about that at all, I guess I still have a lot to learn. Let's say I put together some terms for women, and once they cross the line, do I call them out on it or just freeze out for couple days ? I've read the modification of behavior article, but it think it's much easier do apply those in person. But what do you do over the phone or through texting? I mean you don't have to delete them if they learn how to behave. I need some reading on this, if you guys know any useful tip, let me know. "Blondguy" is correct.. you need to demonstrate value. This doesn't mean you have to actually "have" value... just demonstrate it. You do this by acting like you are the catch instead of the woman. This is how you get leverage. The women must fear losing you. The easiest way to do this is having terms and basically taking charge. I'll take charge in the beginning... then sit back, relax and let the girl do some work too. Then I'll come back again. The girl MUST do some work to be invested! What you do on the phone and with texting depends on the situation and how long you have been dealing with the girl. In the very beginning I usually ignore or delete women who don't want to play. Think about it... when you first meet someone you are trying to make a good impression. If she is acting like a bitch that early on.. then she is a waste of time. After that I follow a 3 strike rule with girls. This means I delete them after they have fucked up 3 times no matter what. They get two warnings. I'll tell them "stop doing this.. I don't like it" or something like that. Not returning calls and texts? Flaking out? Bullshit excuses? Being a bitch? Tell her this behavior is not acceptable. If she continues a third time.... NEXT!!!