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i want my ex back. need advise on this one.
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Author:  napora [ Mon Aug 30, 2010 2:57 pm ]
Post subject:  i want my ex back. need advise on this one.
the situation:

I want my ex GF back. why? because she's the best girl i've ever met in my life. she has a strong personality. and all the personality treats i want in a woman.

het personality treats.

- she's verry mature for her age. but when she is happy ore want's attention she act's like a happy liddle kid in this playfull way. (really adorable:d)
- she's super good with children. and is going to become a really good mother in my eyes. ( she babysitted at 2 kids since they were born. and she does a really good job.)
-she's stubern. verry stubern. and she hates the idea of being wrong.
-she displayes a more than average confidence but she is actually quite shy.
-when she has problems with something she holds her feeling back and sometimes this becomes a little to much for her. the she cries ( girls:d)
-she can't handle to much bad tension. but acts really tuff when needed.
-when your angry at her she blows up in your face or starts crying. she'll try to win the discussions at al cost.

- when she wants something, she will take it.
- she's a really hard worker.
- she's intelligent like hell. (she's still in school and has verry good grades.)
- she's a classy girl. a little conservative. but has a modern vieuw of life. she just likes traditions and stuff.
-she's verry trustworthy and unlikely 2 cheat on her BF. ( you'll have to use the big guns to get this girl:d)
-she doesn't trust anybody verry soon and easy. but when she does. you can tell her anything and she will tell you anything.
-she"s 21 and she go's to university.
-she's a HB 7-9. depends on your taste:d
-she's the perfect mix between a carreerwoman and a mother and housewife.
-she loved me aloth, i never felt so much love radiating from 1 person towards me.
-she doesn't come out verry often. and doesn't like to party.

back 2 the situation.

now 6 months ago (middle of march), i dumped her ( yeah i know stupid me:d). here's the reason why!
Our relationship wasn't going verry well the last 6 months we were together.
because i was never there. i went out aloth, having fun with friends. being a good wingman for friends, working on my game, going out, ...

( i'm learning about pua for a year now. i never cheated on my GF. i only used it 2 create a bigger social circle. and to become a better person for myself. to create oppertunities for myself.)

so when i dumped my GF after this fight we had. i started doing the real pua thing.
i started to learn closing a girl and second day's and all this stuff i never did before.
however it isn't the same. i don't love these girls i close. which fucks everything up for me. so i did some soulsearching about what i wanted in a woman. and i must say my ex comes damn close 2 perfect. I really treated her badly. even after the break up. she wanted me back for about 4 months. but now 1 month later she doesn't want me back anymore. she said she's over me and we will never be together anymore.

I made the big mistake 2 act needy. I guess for the last 3 weeks now. telling her i want her back. and being total AFC. i guess i hoped to trigger these emotions inside her she had for me. well that was some wrong thinking:d
so i stopped doing this. ( at last some good thinking of me:d)

there is a loth of competition out there who is after her.
so i need some advice on amoging asswell, and on staying the alpha dogg into her eyes. there's this natural who's really cocky funny, he's rich and has his life togheter. and there is this advanture guy. great body and funny. those 2 are my biggest fear. this moment i can outgame the others but not those 2.

i have analysed why my ex fell for me in the first place. i was confedent, had aloth of social proof, i was leadingthis group at my local youthcentrum. so i was the alpha man. i'm well groomed. and wasn't needy ass well. ( i however didn't know pua in that time) she fell for this. i was her first BF and she was still a virgin. i believe this could give a heads up.

i don't really know what 2 do now. how do i get her back?

i've found 2 solutions. ==> please feedback ;)

1: working aloth on my inner game and hoping she falls back in love with me. in this case what should i improve on myself and how do i improve it?

2: learn nlp and use it on her.



-if you have another theorie i can use. please tell me.
-if you can help me to improve my inner game. please tell me.
-i'm also looking for great routines, games, test's, stories,...
we had a relationship for about 2 years. so we already kow aloth about each other. so it has to be fresh stuff.

another problem i'm facing.
we have a loth of trouble talking 2 echt other because the hard break up. so this has 2 change ass well. and i figure that almost every question that makes sense can easely be mistaken as needyness :s . it sucks but everything i ask her refers to out past relation. and automaticaly brings up the pain i caused her.
wich isn't a good stimulator for attraction i believe.

how can i handle this problem?
because before i can make her feel attracted to me, i'll have 2 be able to talk to her in a normal way. what would you guys do?


tnx, for reading and helping me out
Author:  SiNfUl [ Mon Aug 30, 2010 10:50 pm ]
Post subject: 
This is a tough one. There is allot of history there so NLP, routines, games, etc. will not work on her. After a 2 year relationship you know just about everything there is to know about each other. If you try and put on an act or game her, she will see it coming a mile away.

The best thing you can do in my opinion is to disappear, vanish. Give her enough time to miss you. You have a past with her so thoughts of you are bound to come up. Of course, if you pester her, these thoughts will never surface. If old feelings come up you MIGHT have something to work with, if not, it may be a lost cause.

Also consider this, if the damage from the break-up was to great, game over. Some girls don't recover from bad break-ups. If that is the case, at least walk away with your pride and stop sweating this girl.

Side note...if it's true that you were her first boyfriend, she may be playing the field now and not interested in being 'tied down'.

Hope this helps.
Author:  napora [ Tue Aug 31, 2010 4:17 pm ]
Post subject: 
tnx.

i thought about it. dissapearing. because i had some break ups before. and i saw that when i saw the girl back after a year or something. it was easy for me to attract her again.

problem with my ex GF is that we live in the same small town. and are bumping up to each other often.
Author:  SiNfUl [ Tue Aug 31, 2010 4:41 pm ]
Post subject: 
Actually, bumping into her can work to your benefit, if you play it right.
Author:  napora [ Wed Sep 01, 2010 10:49 am ]
Post subject: 
ok, but how? she hardly talks to me? and if i ask her someting she answers but she puts zero input in the convo.
Author:  SiNfUl [ Wed Sep 01, 2010 5:34 pm ]
Post subject: 
ok, but how? she hardly talks to me? and if i ask her someting she answers but she puts zero input in the convo.

Yup, that is how it goes sir. Show a woman to much attention and that is exactly what happens. However, do the exact opposite and you will see a shift. Pull your attention away, stop trying to make conversation and she will begin to notice YOU. She will start wondering why you stopped talking to her. Even if she is pissed at you, she can't deal with the fact that you stopped noticing her. Now, you have her attention, now you can start toying with her.

You can't game her (or any women) until she starts to notice you again.
Author:  napora [ Thu Sep 02, 2010 5:20 pm ]
Post subject: 
super.

in that case i did a verry good job today:d
i was at my local youth centrum. saying hi to some friends of me. my esx was there also. i ignored my ex for 90%. she asked me to do some things. she asked if i had a lighter, if i could hand her some objects over. those were the only things were i said someting to her, or didn't ignore her.

it wasn't like i did everyting she asked. i was helping because this weekend the youthcentrum is trowing a party. so it wasn't like i behaved like a puppy to her:d i did stuff for all my friends who asked help.
Author:  KristallNachte [ Thu Sep 02, 2010 8:49 pm ]
Post subject: 
wow really....?


this is fucking oneitis territory.

that main post reeks of desperation and scarcity mentality.
Author:  Kensei [ Thu Sep 02, 2010 9:00 pm ]
Post subject: 
Quote:
wow really....?


this is fucking oneitis territory.

that main post reeks of desperation and scarcity mentality.
This.

But also, wouldn't you rather have a "HB10" with those qualities?
Author:  sman [ Thu Sep 02, 2010 10:06 pm ]
Post subject: 
napora, i hear you man. i had something like it in the past. a gf that we broke up and i was extra needy about her. she was the only girl that after breakup i cried a bit.

it was before i joined the seduction community so had no idea about strategy. i used only my natural instincts. now i understand why it worked.

here are the things i did:
1. i disappeared in order to stop being needy about her. it's like a rehab i had to apply. it took me 1-2 months to get there. during that time i spoke with her on the phone maybe once.

2. i started working out like crazy. it made me less needy for all girls. there are articles that claim that the more you work out the better you have chances to survive and the less you are depend and on the girl => makes you not needy => more confident, less caring and more attractive :)

3. then i started so suggest a beer or burger just for casual catch up. if i were in your shoes i would start slowly building the relationship ladder. start with funny texting. engage her. write some flirty text that reminds her something fun from the past. something that will make her feel good.

do NOT send texts that do not cause emotional response.

4. when texting is normal start having a short phone talks that have mostly attraction material. spike up her BT and when her buying temperature is high you can tell her you really appreciate her personality and you want to be ONLY friends with her. (this would set you as a challenge).

5. now you get to the stage where i left at 3. go on with her once in few weeks just to hang out as friends. this is the place where u gotta do the push/pull with teases,kino, control the conversation BUT don't kiss her. i had few of such meetings. until eventually my x-gf kissed me :)


i do assume u have the skills to touch her attraction switches, to improvise on phone and such. feel free to beep me if u need any further help at sman@master-pua-journey. com

best of luck,
s-man
Author:  Shyler [ Thu Sep 02, 2010 11:18 pm ]
Post subject: 
As long as you have oneitis, your oneitis will prevent you of getting her back.

I'm talking of experience. I once had a girlfriend and she was perfect for me. I loved her so much.
But she broke up with me, and wanted to stay yes. Because of my oneitis, I couldn't let her go.

Worst decision of my life, but I didn't know better by then.

Oneitis makes you needy, insecure and unconfident. It was also that way in my case. I stayed "best friends" with my ex for a couple of moths, but my oneitis ruined it.

Now I've got over the oneitis, learned game and know better.

I just made a topic about curing oneitis, I strongly advice you to read it.
viewtopic.php?p=386674#386674

The only way to be able to get her back is to break rapport and to get over oneitis. If you have got over the oneitis and you've gamed a lot of different other girls, then you may think again if she is still worth trying to get her back.
Author:  AFC Royal [ Fri Sep 03, 2010 2:34 am ]
Post subject: 
I HIGHLY doubt that she is "the girl of your dreams". So you have nothing to lose here.

Learn pickup and find the girl of your dreams.
Author:  napora [ Mon Sep 06, 2010 10:40 pm ]
Post subject: 
tnx guys, you're all really helpfull.
i think i'll dissapear a while out of her live. just to work on my skillset. and inner game.
have some fun with it. meet some really hot hb's. i want it to be a blow in her face if she meets me again. i hope she doesn't ignores me than. ( if she does, what do i do?)
it's gonna be hard. because i'll have to leave alloth of mutual friends 2. how would you guys deal with this?
try to meet them somewere else without her? and tell them i don't want them to bring my ex? and is this a good idea? because they will tell everything i do to each other, so she will hear about it. should i just tell them about my plan?

anyway i'm saving money to go shopping soon. i'm going to start a new style for myself. something more mature. ( my ex really liked costums and stuff) what do you guy's suggest? should i buy the clothes i know she would like?
( it's not that i don't like them, i'm just not used to that style. and my friends would probably think it's strange for me.) although i think i should try it?
any feedback on this?
Author:  Viktimize [ Tue Sep 07, 2010 2:54 am ]
Post subject: 
first things first. how old are you, and how old is she?? no advice can be given till these factors are known. im guessing younger, because you made the comment "she is really mature for her age" this is something you say about 16 year old girls, to convince yourself its alright to fcuk them.

if youre both under the age of 23, then forget about this chick and move on. your ideas on what you want in a woman change drastically after 25, so no sense wasting your prime pussy getting years, with some girl youll wanna get rid of in a few years anyway.
Author:  napora [ Thu Sep 09, 2010 9:46 am ]
Post subject: 
i'm 22, she is 20.
and that's exactly what i mean with she's verry mature for her age.
she's already the settle for a family type of girl.
in our relation she always was the one who wanted to stay home or do a sort of family activity shit. while i was the one who still wanted to party and stuff. that came to great frustration for us both. and we argued aloth about this.

in my time i was single again. i could do what ever i want. i pua'd alloth. was never home and it was always party party party. having fun all the time.

problem is, i realized, this isn't really what i want. i gave in to the fun of the moment. and destroyed something that could make me happy for the rest of my live.
i trew away the best girl in this planet in my eyes. ( i know it's a one-itis thougth, but it really feels that way) she's a girl that i could have and wanted to marrie and have children with. that's someting i can't tell about any other chick i had in the past.

also i really miss the real love.
as a pua it's easy to get a girl in bed and get to love you. but it's never the same. some of you guy's must know what i mean.
when my ex looked at me in my eyes. there was someting really unexplanable about it. ( i call it love:d) i don't have that with other girls. they can look the same way. but for me that feeling just isn't there. and it's already special if they try to look that way. because i than know there just super in love with me.
but non off them can look in my eyes like my ex did. and that SUCKS!!!
and it's not only the look in my eye thing. it are the hugs and the cuddling, the little kisses. you guy's must know what i mean. right?
you just feel it's real love because of this things.
and i now believe those things are things you should have in your live not a 10 page list of hb's you fucked. :d no offence because i also have such a list. but now i want more out this game.

and i had it, but threw it away for an extra page.
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