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pretty girl borrows stuff and does not return it
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Author:  sheardude [ Sun Aug 22, 2010 2:37 am ]
Post subject:  pretty girl borrows stuff and does not return it
Ok, so I've got a situation on my hands. A very pretty girl asked to borrow a shirt of mine. She said she would return it the next day and never did. I can't believe I did it. I can't believe I was so nice that I actually dropped it off in HER mailbox (big mistake, it also felt very sketchy). She at first lied and made excuses but now she is not even answering my messages. I only have her on Facebook and that is the only way I know how to contact her.

I believe she will return it soon and when she does, I want to make her learn a lesson (if she even returns it in person). How do I make her feel bad about lying or just not giving the shirt back on time without making me seem like a jerk or that I am angry or upset? Keep in mind that she will be going to the same college as me (that is why she wanted the shirt. Found out on her profile and pictures it was a party where they all wore shirts of the college they will attend) so it is possible that I could get with her. Only problem is that I am very low value in her eyes. I was the nerd in high school and some bad things that are not true were said about me. How can I make myself seem high value in case I run into her in college aside from social proof (which hopefully I will have)? Also, it is nowhere close to one-itis. I could care less about her but if the opportunity is possible, I will try to take it.
Author:  Hank Moody [ Sun Aug 22, 2010 3:34 am ]
Post subject: 
its just a shirt dude. if u were not low value in her eyes u are now....

dont take it personally. move on. if she gives it you back thank her for returning it. end it there.

unless u want her taking the piss out of you to all her hot campus friends that is.
Author:  simplyenterhere [ Sun Aug 22, 2010 4:11 am ]
Post subject: 
she collects your things and makes a shrine of you in her closet.
Author:  Junglepimp [ Sun Aug 22, 2010 5:25 am ]
Post subject: 
Be a man, show possession over your own stuff, ask for it back in a gently firm manner and then forget it. After all it's just a shirt. The purpose behind this is not to get the shirt back but to DHV.
Author:  sheardude [ Sun Aug 22, 2010 7:10 am ]
Post subject: 
Quote:
Be a man, show possession over your own stuff, ask for it back in a gently firm manner and then forget it. After all it's just a shirt. The purpose behind this is not to get the shirt back but to DHV.
You make a good point but I'm cheap. I don't wanna $12 for another one. You make a good point. I'd look stupid if I reacted to it. I just don't want people taking advantage of me. I'm just sick of it and want change.
Author:  sheardude [ Sun Aug 22, 2010 7:13 am ]
Post subject: 
Quote:
its just a shirt dude. if u were not low value in her eyes u are now....

dont take it personally. move on. if she gives it you back thank her for returning it. end it there.

unless u want her taking the piss out of you to all her hot campus friends that is.
Good point. I gotta have no way of my high school reputation getting to me. I'm probably gonna stay far away from her and her friends until I'm confident enough to be able to get a good reaction from them.
Author:  sheardude [ Sun Aug 22, 2010 7:36 am ]
Post subject: 
But in all seriousness it's just unfair. Why does she get to keep it? Because she's high value?? This world does not make sense. I'm just gonna say thanks if she returns it but also remind her about it if I ever see her in person. I know its just a shirt but the word borrow does not mean keep. Im not paying for another one if there is one just waiting out there for me. Also kind of sucks I don't get to teach her anything so she cleans up her act of lying and not returning it. Why does being nice suck so much? It's so unfair.
Author:  Trotyl [ Sun Aug 22, 2010 9:23 am ]
Post subject: 
To get really honoust with you...she didn't return it because of lack of respect. She just needed something from you and it was totally AFC to just give it, even delivering it! It's just the typical AFC thing to do, randomly give stuff to girls because of their looks, you should've known better being in this community.

Anyway, forget about it. Don't ASK for the shirt back, just give her a hint like 'how was that party' etc etc. If she planned on returning it she'll say 'o wait I still got your shirt'. Just man up and talk to her and try to be confident about it. Waiting it out just seems like the worst thing to do, forget about that high-school bullshit. You should show what you're worth RIGHT NOW.
Author:  Junglepimp [ Sun Aug 22, 2010 10:29 am ]
Post subject: 
Quote:
Quote:
Be a man, show possession over your own stuff, ask for it back in a gently firm manner and then forget it. After all it's just a shirt. The purpose behind this is not to get the shirt back but to DHV.
You make a good point but I'm cheap. I don't wanna $12 for another one. You make a good point. I'd look stupid if I reacted to it. I just don't want people taking advantage of me. I'm just sick of it and want change.
I actually very well understand that. You want two things back:
1. Your reputation
2. Your shirt
So if you ask for your T-shirt, you DHV and if the chick has any sense of shame, she'll return it to you. Just give a valid reason when you ask for it back (cook one up) and be firm. That's 1 and 2 both in your court. If she doesn't give it back, take it as a lesson and forget it. That's more valuable than $12 trust me. and you still have 1 in your court. OR you can scream at her or break into her house and get it out, in which case you neither have 1 nor 2. Hm?

My basic suggestion to you is to try from your end and then move on. Don't go into the history of "why" she didn't give it and "why" she even asked for it.. that's irrelevant and will only demotivate you.
Author:  Zephyrine [ Mon Aug 23, 2010 9:06 pm ]
Post subject: 
Quote:
Quote:
Be a man, show possession over your own stuff, ask for it back in a gently firm manner and then forget it. After all it's just a shirt. The purpose behind this is not to get the shirt back but to DHV.
You make a good point but I'm cheap. I don't wanna $12 for another one. You make a good point. I'd look stupid if I reacted to it. I just don't want people taking advantage of me. I'm just sick of it and want change.
Then change. Don't be petty. Twelve dollars is not that much, and its just a shirt.

Next time a chick asks to borrow something, ask for collateral. Or say no.
Author:  sheardude [ Wed Aug 25, 2010 5:11 am ]
Post subject: 
Good news. I received the shirt back! I was very polite about it. She kept saying she was gonna give it back at different times but never came. She dropped it in my mailbox a few hours ago when I was out. She messaged saying she put it in my mailbox and she did. I'm gonna try to strike up a conversation on Facebook tomorrow since I did not respond to her yet. Probably gonna just talk about college like ask her what hall she is living in and what classes she is taking. Any other tips or suggestions are welcome.
Author:  Junglepimp [ Wed Aug 25, 2010 10:28 am ]
Post subject: 
Quote:
Good news. I received the shirt back! I was very polite about it. She kept saying she was gonna give it back at different times but never came. She dropped it in my mailbox a few hours ago when I was out. She messaged saying she put it in my mailbox and she did. I'm gonna try to strike up a conversation on Facebook tomorrow since I did not respond to her yet. Probably gonna just talk about college like ask her what hall she is living in and what classes she is taking. Any other tips or suggestions are welcome.
Depends really. On what your current impression on her is. I guess you should approach her first, get an idea of the current situation and then analyze your next stop. Good luck :)
Author:  robizeratul [ Thu Aug 26, 2010 4:29 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: pretty girl borrows stuff and does not return it
Don't bother dude,maybe she's some freak:P
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