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Compliments
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Author:  dennis86 [ Sat Jul 10, 2010 4:43 am ]
Post subject:  Compliments
When should you tell a girl that she looks gorgeous or beautiful today? I know you aren't supposed to say that to a girl you just met, but let's say you've known her for a while, is it a good idea to compliment her?
Author:  minsok [ Sat Jul 10, 2010 5:27 am ]
Post subject: 
I guessed a girl was older than she was yesterday (2 years, big whoop) and she got insecure and started asking if she looked old or ugly, so I told her she was gorgeous and I meant it. Did nothing for my game, but at least she doesn't think I'm a d-bag for not soothing her.
Author:  ktime70 [ Sat Jul 10, 2010 9:55 am ]
Post subject: 
Would you tell your friend that he was looking youthfully hansome today?

nope.

so don't do it on a girl.

compliment her for things she EARNT sure.

like if she makes you a kick arse lasagne one night, tell her that it was a fantastic dinner. if she gives you a good back rub, tell her so.

but things like beauty, which she has no control over, it just sounds needy... and if she's fishing (like saying am i too old/ugly), the minute you start propping up her self esteem, you begin to become her emotional tampon, and that means NO sex for you.

friends sooth friends. guys fuck girls.
Author:  minsok [ Sat Jul 10, 2010 11:45 am ]
Post subject: 
I tell my female friends they're hot and sexy all the time. Why wouldn't I? You still get to fuck girls if you compliment them, it's ridiculous to think it will break your game. Just don't do it all the time, and don't use boring compliments like "You're pretty (women despise this one)". I maybe forgot to say that I looked away from the girl while she was digging and then said I hate throwing out compliments, but yeah, she was gorgeous. It wasn't even a good compliment because it's totally common. "I'd hit it" might have better suited my needs. Oh, and compliments can smooth over kino. She had pink hair. I started playing with it during a lull in conversation and said, "I really like the color of you hair." She probably got that one a lot, too, but oh well.

Agreeing with ktime70, they do have to earn a compliment, but you can still give them compliments just for looking good. Girls do actually work to make themselves look good and appreciate being noticed. I have no problem easing a girl's insecurities and becoming a source of validation for her. If someone is seeking validation from you, it means that you have the power at that moment, and I'm not scared to give away a little power to make her feel good (which she'll associate to being around me). Sorry if this approach has made you a tampon in the past, ktime70, but you sound a little bitter about how girls don't have to earn their pretty. It's more work than you think and the cause of a lot of emotional baggage. I feel genuinely sorry for the shit girls have to put up with and the time they have to take just to meet a standard of perfection.
Author:  Sticksie [ Sat Jul 10, 2010 12:37 pm ]
Post subject: 
Compiments are fine at any time. Though escalating without complimenting can keep her chasing, thinking "doe's he like me? - doe's he want to kiss me?" once you verbalise your interest you change the frame to her thinking "oh he likes me do I like him? - Oh he wants to kiss me do I want to kiss him?" which can work for you too.
Just an insight for you....
Author:  jurupa [ Sat Jul 10, 2010 3:56 pm ]
Post subject: 
It depends on the girl. I find that giving compliments to girls that are generally 25 years or older works well upfront, while younger girls it works better if you hold off giving compliments. Again this is in general. But it really depends on the girl.
Author:  Shyler [ Sat Jul 10, 2010 4:39 pm ]
Post subject: 
Quote:
Agreeing with ktime70, they do have to earn a compliment, but you can still give them compliments just for looking good. Girls do actually work to make themselves look good and appreciate being noticed. I have no problem easing a girl's insecurities and becoming a source of validation for her. If someone is seeking validation from you, it means that you have the power at that moment, and I'm not scared to give away a little power to make her feel good (which she'll associate to being around me).

It's more work than you think and the cause of a lot of emotional baggage. I feel genuinely sorry for the shit girls have to put up with and the time they have to take just to meet a standard of perfection.
I so agree with this actually.

Sometimes we have to stop thinking that they are just a cunt with legs. Girls do their best for a lot of things, and sometimes we got to apprecciate them. A good compliment on the right time that realy hits her, the kind of compliment like "finally, someone special appreciates me", can make wonders, and can do more then tons of routines.

We hear "don't compliment a girl because she will treat you like dirt" all the time, that we get scared by complimenting girls.

coincidently, i lately met a shy cute girl. when we were making pictures, she constantly said how bad she looked on the picture. i told her then that she was looking fine on the picture. i was affraid to tell her she looked good just the way she was. she told me she had a quite low self-esteem. She wasn't a hb9, but rather a 7-7,5, but quite shy (which is what i like in girls). later that day, i met her again, and all i did was teasing and negging her.
i found out i shouldn't have done that, because she rather responded quite insulted, without saying anything, which is not good.
it ended not very good, and afterwards, i wished i told her she was kind of special.
i don't realy care now, it's passé, but it kind of opened my eyes.

We don't compliment enough.

(not saying now that we have to adore girls and compliment her on the cheesy way).

Don't we guys just never want to compliment a girl on something? of course we want! sometimes, we just want to say to a girl how cute she is, how thankfull you are, how special she means to you.
Giving compliments feels like saying hi to a stranger or giving money to the poor or for a good cause, you feel good. and the person you compliment will feel good as well, just like jurupa said:" I'm not scared to give away a little power to make her feel good (which she'll associate to being around me)"

Nothing wrong with that. When she deserves, just do it, but like with everything, with moderation.
Author:  Daytime artist [ Sat Jul 10, 2010 4:42 pm ]
Post subject: 
Thinking that a compliment will somehow make you lose power sounds really insecure.
Author:  Shyler [ Sat Jul 10, 2010 4:45 pm ]
Post subject: 
Quote:
Thinking that a compliment will somehow make you lose power sounds really insecure.
no, on the contrary, don't giving a shit about SPAM some of your power to do something that can be seen as "wussy"by others, that's quite alfa. think about it.
Author:  Daytime artist [ Sat Jul 10, 2010 4:54 pm ]
Post subject: 
If you compliment her it's a gift from you to her. And she should be grateful. If she's not put her in her place or leave her, she's not worth your time.
Author:  haudas [ Sat Jul 10, 2010 4:57 pm ]
Post subject: 
What should I say when a girls asks something like:
Do you find me pretty?
Arent you going to compliment me?
How do I look?
Author:  dkjscfklsdfhj [ Sat Jul 10, 2010 5:13 pm ]
Post subject: 
Compliments need to be about giving value, not taking value. If your mindset is like "if I compliment her, she will like me more or want to sleep with me" then you're trying to take value by giving out compliments. That's the mindset AFC's have when they compliment pretty girls.

If you're in a mindset where you want to give a compliment because it would make the other person feel good, then that's a good time to do it. If you're out with your friend playing pool, and he pulls off some cool combo shot you'd say, "dang dude, that was badass. There's a pool shark in the house." So yeah, if a girl does something cool or impressive or that takes a lot of work, you can compliment her with this mindset.
Author:  jurupa [ Sat Jul 10, 2010 9:54 pm ]
Post subject: 
Quote:
jurupa said:" I'm not scared to give away a little power to make her feel good (which she'll associate to being around me)"
I said that? Where?
:?
Author:  mattdub1 [ Sun Jul 11, 2010 2:33 am ]
Post subject: 
I compliment women all the time and guess what? I get laid.

Compliments make most women feel good, even if it's the first thing you say. What matters is HOW you give her a compliment.

You need to say it from a place of strength and value... and pretty matter-of-factly. I GUARANTEE it makes her feel good if it's a genuine compliment.

A good goal for a newer guy is DROPPING ALL THIS "PUA" STUFF, and focusing your entire game on making women "smile on the inside."

You'll fucking clean house.
Author:  Shyler [ Sun Jul 11, 2010 11:34 am ]
Post subject: 
Quote:
Quote:
jurupa said:" I'm not scared to give away a little power to make her feel good (which she'll associate to being around me)"
I said that? Where?
:?
Whoops o.0 !!!
correction: minsok said that. :p
Quote:
Compliments need to be about giving value, not taking value. If your mindset is like "if I compliment her, she will like me more or want to sleep with me" then you're trying to take value by giving out compliments. That's the mindset AFC's have when they compliment pretty girls.

If you're in a mindset where you want to give a compliment because it would make the other person feel good, then that's a good time to do it. If you're out with your friend playing pool, and he pulls off some cool combo shot you'd say, "dang dude, that was badass. There's a pool shark in the house." So yeah, if a girl does something cool or impressive or that takes a lot of work, you can compliment her with this mindset.
I second that.
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