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Does the group you are out with affect your game?
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Author:  the scamp [ Sat May 08, 2010 7:48 am ]
Post subject:  Does the group you are out with affect your game?
Okay guys I need an honest opinion here.

Is there such a thing as having an "off night"?

I'm very aware that in the past I have been making up excuses for bad game and rationalising that it was some other factor.
Eg.

It was too noisy to approach...
She was really bitchy...
Not the right time..


It's one of my afc behaviours that I'm trying to get rid of.

Anyway basically last night felt like an "off night"

Went out with my mate and three of his mates (4 blokes 1 girl).
We spend the first two and a half hours of the night in the back garden of an old man pub, the 4 of them smoking tab after tab and talking about kitchen fittings or some shit. I'm peacocked and feeling good, but I can just feel my energy slipping away minute by interminable minute. Seriously this place is a major sausage fest, can only be 3 women in the place. After what seems like eternity a bloke and his gf sit down near me. I immediately open and it feels good, can feel myself warming up.

Should girls out with their bf's blatantly flirt with you so much!?

So we move on to a cocktail bar where my mate knows the barstaff and this place is full of high value targets. But here's the real afc bit. I just don't open at all

Get major AA.

I open a few sets in the third bar, but they are all a bit flat (blame it on my mood).

Now at the moment I'm rationalising that my game was flat and low energy because I was out with a group of folk (none of which were gaming) who were happy to not mingle at all.

Is this right or am I making excuses?

Scamps
Author:  magnum45 [ Sun May 09, 2010 6:41 am ]
Post subject: 
one night shouldn't have any effect on you as a person. You need to work on inner game.
Author:  the scamp [ Sun May 09, 2010 8:44 am ]
Post subject: 
Yeah I take your point.

I reckon my inner game is pretty sound, it could improve of course but I reckon by and large it's good.

Looking back their are two reasons that night didn't work out

I don't get to go out much with mates anymore so I put FAR too much at stake on having a GREAT night in a big city!

AND

I spent the first half of the night (in my view the crucial, high energy, open as many sets as possible period). Sat down freezing my tits off with a group of chaps steadfastly working on getting enough drinking in to make sure they got pissed enough.

But, it's past I can move on a learn from it.

This weeks learns were;

"Don't put too much emphasis on results, just on enjoying yourself."

"Don't let the group of people you are out with, influence your own behaviour"
Author:  magnum45 [ Mon May 10, 2010 3:16 am ]
Post subject: 
I'm glad you feel that your inner game is good. But to me it seems to be a little low. I know everyone could improve, but if you are concerned because one night didn't turn out well then you are too worried.
Author:  omar973 [ Mon May 10, 2010 3:51 am ]
Post subject: 
Lol, I hate when I go out with intentions of sarging but my friends want to enjoy beer and vice versa when I want to enjoy beer but my friends insist on sarging!

Easily remedied by knowing the group (what do they prefer? Are they into sarging or just wanna enjoy the nightlife?). Also having a game plan. Example, saying to your mates "I wanna get laid tonight" or "no chicks tonight lets find a good brewery."

You don't wanna be the friend who annoys your group because you're not hanging out with them. But you also want a group of friends who are willing to sarge and wing you.
Author:  Braden [ Mon May 10, 2010 4:03 am ]
Post subject: 
ah i have/had this similar problem and have been working on squashing those thoughts. what it really comes down to is the inner game part of "dont set search for results, just have fun." the first time that actually into use i got two numbers, and day2 for both. so the results come when you dont care about it. you have to think of the night a lot like the girls; "there are always more, so why care so much about this one"

a little inner game work and reframing can do wonders
Author:  Rune [ Mon May 10, 2010 4:06 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Does the group you are out with affect your game?
Quote:
Okay guys I need an honest opinion here.

Is there such a thing as having an "off night"?
Yes and No.

You choose to have an On/Off night. Do you not have two options for a lightswitch; On and Off?

Likewise, do you not have two options for a good night; Good Night or NOT Good Night?
Quote:
I'm very aware that in the past I have been making up excuses for bad game and rationalising that it was some other factor.
Glad you've acknowledged the flaw. You made a giant step to greatness.
Quote:
It was too noisy to approach...
She was really bitchy...
Not the right time..
All the above excuses have a root:
Thinking.

Quote:
It's one of my afc behaviours that I'm trying to get rid of.
Indeed it is.
Quote:
Went out with my mate and three of his mates (4 blokes 1 girl).
We spend the first two and a half hours of the night in the back garden of an old man pub, the 4 of them smoking tab after tab and talking about kitchen fittings or some shit.
I like Kitchen Fittings...

...whatever the hell those are. xD.
Quote:
I'm peacocked and feeling good, but I can just feel my energy slipping away minute by interminable minute. Seriously this place is a major sausage fest, can only be 3 women in the place. After what seems like eternity a bloke and his gf sit down near me. I immediately open and it feels good, can feel myself warming up.
There. You just CHOSE to have an OFF night.
Weakness pinpointed.

You're not enjoying the moment. Sure, it's a sausage fest with only 3 women. Dude, if you can have a blast being stranded on an abandoned island, with nothing but coconuts and crabs for food, you can have a blast in a sausagefest. It's all in your HEAD.
Quote:
Should girls out with their bf's blatantly flirt with you so much!?
You act as if that's wrong...
IMO, you shouldn't even make a girl your GF unless you're marrying the chick.
Quote:
So we move on to a cocktail bar where my mate knows the barstaff and this place is full of high value targets. But here's the real afc bit. I just don't open at all
You're thinking too much.
Quote:
Get major AA.
You're thinking too much.
Quote:
I open a few sets in the third bar, but they are all a bit flat (blame it on my mood).
You're thinking too much, AND you're not enjoying the moment.
Quote:
Now at the moment I'm rationalising that my game was flat and low energy because I was out with a group of folk (none of which were gaming) who were happy to not mingle at all.
Stop rationalizing.
You're thinking too much.
Quote:
Is this right or am I making excuses?
Shut up and stop thinking. :)
Quote:
Scamps
Rune
Author:  the scamp [ Mon May 10, 2010 6:41 am ]
Post subject: 
Rune,

Legend


Scamps
Author:  mattarama [ Mon May 10, 2010 8:09 am ]
Post subject: 
An off day exists. Not everyone is feeling their greatest all the time.
But ultimately, it all boils down to you.

For example
Why did you have an off-day?
Did you not sleep enough because you chose to stay up late?
Did you do something wrong at work and have your boss yell at you?
Did you get in a fight with a friend?

And if you're going to say the group you were with is what hampered your game that night...then what is it?
The group you chose to hang out with hampered your game.

If you need to sarge alone or sarge with buddies that are into game then seperate your sarging nights from your 'with the boy' nights, because they seem to be fine getting no action.
Ultimately, it is your decision, your choice, your reality.
Author:  Chelios [ Mon May 10, 2010 11:22 am ]
Post subject: 
Rune hit the nail on the head, but with me, the group I'm out with can have bad effect on my games as they are AFC's. Maybe I should use my initiative more and show them I'm different by gaming well.
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