PUA Forum :: Can somone become more social??

I am not fully unscocial like I can have a conversation but its really soo bad. I feel like i dont click with some people as i do with others (who turn out to be my good friends).

Like even just having a conversation with a guy, i do not know what to talk about after a while and i just continue to do what ever i was doing (like school work at school or eating lunch at the cafeteria).

Man in highschool its all about social value too and I used to be pretty social back then but i feel like i made a fool out of my self because i acted wierd to be social.

How can I build my communication skills up? This is not only for pua but for life. I need to be able to make friends and clients with links for job oportunities in the future etc.

Sure If I go and approach a girl, i can only talk for a while i noticed and then the story is over. So the chat wit hthe girl is maximum 5 minutes then i go away and tell her il talk to her later but i never do because i dont know what to talk about.

I have gotten the videos RSD (real social dynamics) from my brother and will they help me build my social skill? Should I watch the blueprint decoded? or what should i start with.

What I do, when I talk to guys, is I just be random and say what I'm thinking. But with girls I can't do that because I care too much. The trick is to not care about the outcome, or even the conversation or person at all. I can make friends with practically any dude who isn't a douche because I make them laugh by saying what I'm thinking or being completely random or not afraid to say something I wouldn't normally say.

Quote:

Actually by nature men are very random with their topics of discussions and conversations in general. Women are the creatures that like to remain on one particular topic and dissect it over and over and over for hours and hours. This isn't how men communicate, and that is why when talking to men, shooting the shit is a lot different then shooting the shit with women. There is a difference between the sexes and learning how to consciously take a different approach for both is a skill that you will have to master.

Author:	[AFC] Socrates [ Thu Apr 15, 2010 1:21 am ]
Post subject:	Can somone become more social??
I am not fully unscocial like I can have a conversation but its really soo bad. I feel like i dont click with some people as i do with others (who turn out to be my good friends). Like even just having a conversation with a guy, i do not know what to talk about after a while and i just continue to do what ever i was doing (like school work at school or eating lunch at the cafeteria). Man in highschool its all about social value too and I used to be pretty social back then but i feel like i made a fool out of my self because i acted wierd to be social. How can I build my communication skills up? This is not only for pua but for life. I need to be able to make friends and clients with links for job oportunities in the future etc. Sure If I go and approach a girl, i can only talk for a while i noticed and then the story is over. So the chat wit hthe girl is maximum 5 minutes then i go away and tell her il talk to her later but i never do because i dont know what to talk about. I have gotten the videos RSD (real social dynamics) from my brother and will they help me build my social skill? Should I watch the blueprint decoded? or what should i start with.

Author:	jackb1900 [ Thu Apr 15, 2010 1:33 am ]
Post subject:	Re: Can somone become more social??
Quote: I am not fully unscocial like I can have a conversation but its really soo bad. I feel like i dont click with some people as i do with others (who turn out to be my good friends). Like even just having a conversation with a guy, i do not know what to talk about after a while and i just continue to do what ever i was doing (like school work at school or eating lunch at the cafeteria). Man in highschool its all about social value too and I used to be pretty social back then but i feel like i made a fool out of my self because i acted wierd to be social. How can I build my communication skills up? This is not only for pua but for life. I need to be able to make friends and clients with links for job oportunities in the future etc. Sure If I go and approach a girl, i can only talk for a while i noticed and then the story is over. So the chat wit hthe girl is maximum 5 minutes then i go away and tell her il talk to her later but i never do because i dont know what to talk about. I have gotten the videos RSD (real social dynamics) from my brother and will they help me build my social skill? Should I watch the blueprint decoded? or what should i start with. I don't know, WILL THEY HELP YOU!? Will going out and striking up conversations help you? Will watching people who know how to communicate help you? Will learning to be confident help you? Yes, to everything, now stop asking what is going to help you communicate better and start practicing by watching other people, listening to other people, and trying to mimic other people. This is called learning, and this is how human beings and pretty much every mammal on the planet does it.

Author:	Sappa [ Thu Apr 15, 2010 1:42 am ]
Post subject:
I am the exact same way...so advice from others would be awesome. BUT, One thing i noticed was that i would ask allot of questions over and over and once i ran out of questions to ask i would get stuck and just shutup... One day something clicked on inside my head and i started expanding my questions. as example This is what i did before: Me: "so where you from?" HB: Answer Me: thats sweet is it nice there at this time of the year?

Author:	Deadeyexx [ Thu Apr 15, 2010 4:03 am ]
Post subject:
I don't think any kind of information will help you. It will just keep you from socializing for as long as it takes you to read it. You just need to get out there and do it as much as possible. Don't be so concerned with results. Whether you annoy or anger people doesn't matter, as it's all just practice. Eventually, you'll have to start leading conversations the way you want them to go to really enjoy social gatherings. However, the only way you can do that is to be really comfortable socializing in the first place. Keep at it.

Author:	OriginalPrankster [ Thu Apr 15, 2010 5:44 am ]
Post subject:
What I do, when I talk to guys, is I just be random and say what I'm thinking. But with girls I can't do that because I care too much. The trick is to not care about the outcome, or even the conversation or person at all. I can make friends with practically any dude who isn't a douche because I make them laugh by saying what I'm thinking or being completely random or not afraid to say something I wouldn't normally say.

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Author:	Wulver [ Thu Apr 15, 2010 7:26 am ]
Post subject:
I talk too much...When I was much younger I was totally introverted though so yes you can totally change. It takes time...you need to BUILD YOUR INNER CONFIDENCE.

Author:	jackb1900 [ Thu Apr 15, 2010 3:43 pm ]
Post subject:
Quote: What I do, when I talk to guys, is I just be random and say what I'm thinking. But with girls I can't do that because I care too much. The trick is to not care about the outcome, or even the conversation or person at all. I can make friends with practically any dude who isn't a douche because I make them laugh by saying what I'm thinking or being completely random or not afraid to say something I wouldn't normally say. Actually by nature men are very random with their topics of discussions and conversations in general. Women are the creatures that like to remain on one particular topic and dissect it over and over and over for hours and hours. This isn't how men communicate, and that is why when talking to men, shooting the shit is a lot different then shooting the shit with women. There is a difference between the sexes and learning how to consciously take a different approach for both is a skill that you will have to master.

Author:	Tal0n [ Thu Apr 15, 2010 9:27 pm ]
Post subject:
I'm just going to say real quick, that's it's not always about confidence. Some people just have a hard time being good at conversation. I know some people who are very confident and can go and talk to anyone, they jsut don't know what to say. I myself am very confident, and it's only been through (as was mentioned) learning the art of mimicry, and good ol' trial and error, and the ever essential practice that I've been improving.

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