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Is self deprecating humor and/or wierd goofy Humor..
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Author:  thisguy01 [ Mon Apr 12, 2010 8:44 pm ]
Post subject:  Is self deprecating humor and/or wierd goofy Humor..
Unacceptable as a PUA?.. I ask because these are a big part of my personality.. And some of the things I do when in a really good mood, would imo, seem socially unnacceptable. In my early 20's I have decent confidence, the people that know me get me, but anyone that I am not particularly close too, I try to hide my true self(Going in my head and observing the situation as some would call it). When in state you can do anything I think I have heard somewhere, but I am just curious..

I dance randomly for the hell of it, make random quotes from movies in their voices, sing at inappropriate times.. And with all of this, I get the, "You are wierd" comment a lot.. But I have nabbed a few girls in my day with this bizzar stuff.

This came to me when I realized that most PUA's or guys i'v seen in general that are good with women, don't particularly do any of this behavior. Imo, Negs and that are for spotting these flaws in others. When showing themselves they only show the best of themselves, the best confident players they can be..

So I ask, is making fun of yourself in jokes bad? Or saying random shit? In the long run with picking up girls is this one section of my personality that I should actually consider revamping a bit?
Author:  V3nu [ Mon Apr 12, 2010 8:58 pm ]
Post subject: 
Quote:
So I ask, is making fun of yourself in jokes bad?
Well this can be a double edge sword, but what you described is actually having fun with yourself and not caring what other people thing.

As you yourself said you don't see many PUAs doing that, well that is because they are so in their mind over thinking every single move to the point where they are not having fun, and that happens to me too on the nights where I specifically go out to work on a specific PU aspect,

And yes I too get "you are weird" comment of the things I do when I'm having fun and at the same time spike attraction through the roof, but it only works on girls that understand you are having fun which is the reason you were able to "nabbed a few girls", it is normal, HAVE FUN!

Cheers
Author:  Double J [ Mon Apr 12, 2010 10:25 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Is self deprecating humor and/or wierd goofy Humor..
Quote:
Unacceptable as a PUA?.. I ask because these are a big part of my personality.. And some of the things I do when in a really good mood, would imo, seem socially unnacceptable. In my early 20's I have decent confidence, the people that know me get me, but anyone that I am not particularly close too, I try to hide my true self(Going in my head and observing the situation as some would call it). When in state you can do anything I think I have heard somewhere, but I am just curious..

I dance randomly for the hell of it, make random quotes from movies in their voices, sing at inappropriate times.. And with all of this, I get the, "You are wierd" comment a lot.. But I have nabbed a few girls in my day with this bizzar stuff.

This came to me when I realized that most PUA's or guys i'v seen in general that are good with women, don't particularly do any of this behavior. Imo, Negs and that are for spotting these flaws in others. When showing themselves they only show the best of themselves, the best confident players they can be..

So I ask, is making fun of yourself in jokes bad? Or saying random shit? In the long run with picking up girls is this one section of my personality that I should actually consider revamping a bit?

Wow. It's like your a 1 year younger version of me. everything you have said i have done, so i hope what im about to tell you will help you out.

Self deprecating humor is funny, with friends, or once in set. Once means you don't take yourself too seriously, twice or more means you have confidence issues. (at least that is what they will think).

I love to make jokes, at the expense of myself and everyone ells :) but i noticed sets turn bad quick if you start ripping on yourself. I actively stopped myself from saying anything negative about myself for the best part of a month to correct this problem. Sets go allot better.

As long as you have a good amount of intent and rapport going with a target, it is fine to throw in your own personal jokes that make you laugh, the trick is just not over doing it.

I would say the best thing to do would be to go out for a couple of weeks, open sets and be as crazy as you feel you would be with friends, and see the results, then go out and be humorless and see where that gets you, then work out a good middle ground between the too.
Author:  WitandFun [ Tue Apr 13, 2010 9:35 am ]
Post subject: 
Hhaha im like this too!!

Yea all the other replies pretty much sum it up!! Its really attractive for a girl if you act yourself and not care what people think about you! Ive got some "your crazy" comments etc etc but then im making out with them an hour or so later!

Just be yourself bro, i think our personalities are winners! lol
Author:  _Lothario_ [ Tue Apr 13, 2010 8:47 pm ]
Post subject: 
Girls love it when you don't care what they think. Maybe they dont "love" it but they're attracted to it. I was talking to a set my friend had opened and he asked me what I was doing the next day. I said I couldnt hang out during the day because i was going to a reptile show. The hot girl says "reptiles? please don't tell me you're into that!" and i was like

"FUCK YOU, HELL YEAH I'm into that!"

And then she was like..."why. tell me more about it"

You just have to be you and be able to joke about yourself and be proud of who you are. The reason why comedy can be a bad thing is because it leaves out the mystery. It creates comfort really fast and not always attraction.

Make jokes about things other than your self and keep the vibe fun, but don't overdisclose too early. That'll put you in the friend zone.
Author:  jackb1900 [ Wed Apr 14, 2010 6:34 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Is self deprecating humor and/or wierd goofy Humor..
Quote:
Unacceptable as a PUA?.. I ask because these are a big part of my personality.. And some of the things I do when in a really good mood, would imo, seem socially unnacceptable. In my early 20's I have decent confidence, the people that know me get me, but anyone that I am not particularly close too, I try to hide my true self(Going in my head and observing the situation as some would call it). When in state you can do anything I think I have heard somewhere, but I am just curious..

I dance randomly for the hell of it, make random quotes from movies in their voices, sing at inappropriate times.. And with all of this, I get the, "You are wierd" comment a lot.. But I have nabbed a few girls in my day with this bizzar stuff.

This came to me when I realized that most PUA's or guys i'v seen in general that are good with women, don't particularly do any of this behavior. Imo, Negs and that are for spotting these flaws in others. When showing themselves they only show the best of themselves, the best confident players they can be..

So I ask, is making fun of yourself in jokes bad? Or saying random shit? In the long run with picking up girls is this one section of my personality that I should actually consider revamping a bit?
All these people saying self-deprecating humor is good are morons. WHY THE FUCK WOULD YOU PUT YOURSELF DOWN? Have you ever heard any guy walking around with a fine ass girl dismiss himself? Being weird is one thing, talking down on yourself is another. Would you punch yourself in a street fight? Then why the hell are you punching yourself when you are trying to display value to a woman?

Stop the self-deprecating humor, it is tragic, and very depressing. Also another reason you get a lot of "YOU'RE WEIRD!" comments is because you do NOT know how to keep the jokes relevant to the conversation, you do NOT know how to keep the funny quirks relevant to the conversation. You must be relevant otherwise how the hell is she going to know what you're talking about? If you are talking about a movie and you quote that movie, fine! If you are talking about what to eat for lunch and you bring up a random movie it reminded you of, who the fuck cares? Relevancy, if you aren't relevant, she doesn't want to fuck you. Understand?
Author:  Deadeyexx [ Thu Apr 15, 2010 4:31 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Is self deprecating humor and/or wierd goofy Humor..
Quote:
All these people saying self-deprecating humor is good are morons. WHY THE FUCK WOULD YOU PUT YOURSELF DOWN? Have you ever heard any guy walking around with a fine ass girl dismiss himself? Being weird is one thing, talking down on yourself is another. Would you punch yourself in a street fight? Then why the hell are you punching yourself when you are trying to display value to a woman?

Stop the self-deprecating humor, it is tragic, and very depressing. Also another reason you get a lot of "YOU'RE WEIRD!" comments is because you do NOT know how to keep the jokes relevant to the conversation, you do NOT know how to keep the funny quirks relevant to the conversation. You must be relevant otherwise how the hell is she going to know what you're talking about? If you are talking about a movie and you quote that movie, fine! If you are talking about what to eat for lunch and you bring up a random movie it reminded you of, who the fuck cares? Relevancy, if you aren't relevant, she doesn't want to fuck you. Understand?
You're absolutely right. However, to get to the point of being cool and relevant all the time takes an immense amount of holding back for some. I've posted another thread similar to this titled "as confidence rises, social acceptance drops". Maybe your idea of having fun and what it takes to display value are completely opposite? then what? Not everyone's cut out to be a natural. I can be cool & relevant. It gets me laid, but isn't much fun.

For the OP, keep in mind that nobody is perfect. You could probably cut back some on the self-slamming humor, but your dorky, fun personality is who you are. No, it may not convey high-value for the perfectionist wannabes who are often the hottest girls, but at least you're having fun. If you do want to step up your game, then work on faking it.
Author:  jackb1900 [ Thu Apr 15, 2010 5:05 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Is self deprecating humor and/or wierd goofy Humor..
Quote:
Quote:
All these people saying self-deprecating humor is good are morons. WHY THE FUCK WOULD YOU PUT YOURSELF DOWN? Have you ever heard any guy walking around with a fine ass girl dismiss himself? Being weird is one thing, talking down on yourself is another. Would you punch yourself in a street fight? Then why the hell are you punching yourself when you are trying to display value to a woman?

Stop the self-deprecating humor, it is tragic, and very depressing. Also another reason you get a lot of "YOU'RE WEIRD!" comments is because you do NOT know how to keep the jokes relevant to the conversation, you do NOT know how to keep the funny quirks relevant to the conversation. You must be relevant otherwise how the hell is she going to know what you're talking about? If you are talking about a movie and you quote that movie, fine! If you are talking about what to eat for lunch and you bring up a random movie it reminded you of, who the fuck cares? Relevancy, if you aren't relevant, she doesn't want to fuck you. Understand?
You're absolutely right. However, to get to the point of being cool and relevant all the time takes an immense amount of holding back for some. I've posted another thread similar to this titled "as confidence rises, social acceptance drops". Maybe your idea of having fun and what it takes to display value are completely opposite? then what? Not everyone's cut out to be a natural. I can be cool & relevant. It gets me laid, but isn't much fun.

For the OP, keep in mind that nobody is perfect. You could probably cut back some on the self-slamming humor, but your dorky, fun personality is who you are. No, it may not convey high-value for the perfectionist wannabes who are often the hottest girls, but at least you're having fun. If you do want to step up your game, then work on faking it.
I'm not saying don't be dorky, fun, and nerdy if that is what you enjoy, and that is who you are. Changing your personality isn't really an option anyways, only changing your behavior is. I should of clarified better on what I said, but what I was trying to get across is a girl isn't going to accept you for you until you are at least fucking her, and have at least invested some time with her. Why would you want to reveal yourself completely, with all of your unique quirks and fun loving qualities in the first hour of conversation, or even the first month of conversation? These are the things that should take someone years to figure out, and that is the fun process of relationships. So all I am saying is keep it relevant until you feel it is time to let more and more of your underlying character seep out and see how she responds. Not every girl is going to like your personality, but the one who can enjoy you as you rev up to revealing everything about yourself, even your darkest secrets, and is still asking to be with you, then you know you've found a girl of quality. Too many men here are focused on either sex because they've never had it, or just getting into a relationship because they've never had it.

Relationship experience is good, and so is sexual experience, but being able to observe and make judgment calls based on people's true intentions is in my mind the main goal of pick-up artistry. Otherwise if you are looking for a wife, how do you know you're not just marrying a whore?
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