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cousin
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Author:  whattttttt [ Fri Mar 05, 2010 2:13 pm ]
Post subject:  cousin

Background info: I moved to another country for school, I won't say where but its in europe, and I've been only speaking the local language. I've been here since september of 2009. I have a bit of family here, but I live in my own apartment.

I have a second cousin who's a year younger than me, and she has clearly taken a liking to me. Plenty of ioi's, calls me up every weekend to go out, usually clubbing.
As I mentioned, this is europe, its not illegal to have a relationship with a cousin, but I don't know if its socially acceptable, I can't image it to be...
Her great-grandmother is my grandma's sister, so, unfortunately, she is a blood relative..

I've been having mixed feeling about her. She's super fit and a real person, and I can't help feeling attracted to her at times. I've never met her before, the first time was a few months ago and we hit it off since. Now, I've been running a lot of game (with other girls), working on my situational confidence and natural game, and opening a lot during the day when running errands or at school, not to mention clubbing, I found a local pua and we've been sarging weeknights. I've been having plenty of success, so this isn't some desperate need for a female touch. I feel bad for leading her on, I don't even know what I want, but I like going out clubbing with her. Plenty of social value having her by my side, I've opened plenty with her, usually mixed sets, but I always feel guilty every time i number close when shes with me. I feel guilty in general for 'running game' on her.

A few weeks ago she compared me to a guy she went out with, and straight up told me she likes me better.. the way we dance, talk, and shit (not surprised, but still, i didn't expect her to tell me straight up). She tells me things like she's lonely, but that could go both ways (lonely sexually/ lonely socially). I haven't escalated past grinding on the dancefloor, pointed for her to kiss me on the cheek for a picture, and arm around her while sitting on a couch. It just felt natural and I wasn't thinking about it.. I'll be honest, my dick wants to fuck her, but if I know its a realllllly bad idea. She's family... It would suck if it got all awkward afterwards, family events and shit. Plus she's not just some girl I can just never see again if it goes sour. Even if I was to try and avoid her, we'll still keep running into eachother at family events.

And assuming it doesn't get awkward (not right away) what next? I cant fucking date her.... she lives with her parents who I'm sure are a little suspicious about our friendship as it is... if she starts seeing me more then what?

If I keep it going the way it is, the sexual tension will just build, eventually I'll get slightly too drunk and start escalating it... and drunk fuck her, and thats the last thing I want to do, because that will almost guarantee the post-awkwardness.

I don't want to stop chilling with her, I know she would be heartbroken by it, but it would probably the best for her, even if she doesnt realize it. like i said, i enjoy spending time with her, and honestly, I've only been here for little while, and i dont have too many friends here, so i enjoy the mutual friendship with her, and I would hate to lose that over a drunk fuck. I've taken a weekend off from her last weekend since I thought we've been chilling too much. I'm seeing her tonight though.

I really don't know what to do. I can't help but think of the thrill of having a 'forbidden' thing with her. but it would never work. I'm an adrenalin junkie, and i thrive in those environments. But STILL. FUCK! I don't know what to do. I don't even know why I'm typing this here, I guess I'm hoping for an off-chance that someone will read this who went through something similar and tell me which path they took and what happened for the........ but what are the odds of that happening?

Author:  lostbutnotfound [ Fri Mar 05, 2010 2:24 pm ]
Post subject: 

i can tell you this much, as somone who lives in europe, dating your cousins is not social accepted, rather fownd uppon. and to this day i have never heard of that kind of relationship. so the smart thing would be to end it, unless there is some crazy\fantastic\super- connection between you, that you dont seeing having with another woman...

Author:  StreetLight [ Fri Mar 05, 2010 2:49 pm ]
Post subject: 

... erm, don't know hoe to bring it to ya, but it's kinda sick

try NOT to, coz it will be weird for a long long time

Author:  lostbutnotfound [ Fri Mar 05, 2010 2:57 pm ]
Post subject: 

its not sick, its kinda normal to get attracted to people, specialy somone who is hot and in to you, but since its close famili ralations you shouldnt.

Author:  whattttttt [ Fri Mar 05, 2010 4:58 pm ]
Post subject: 

thanks for the replies.

i posted the same thing on yahoo answers and 7 out of 10 replies were to 'go for it', and the 3 out of 10 were more like 'ewwww nasty'

i dont know if its a good thing that im getting mostly positive feedback : P

Author:  mrcoffee999888 [ Fri Mar 05, 2010 5:06 pm ]
Post subject: 

It's possible that at least some out of the 7/10 were sarcastic "go for it's"

I'd say definitely no..

I mean I have hot relatives, and though I may be even attracted to them physically. It's not a good deal.

Watch the whole series of Arrested Development with Michael Cera. His character, and his cousin Maybe (thats her name), kind of have this comedic sexual tension, and it's weird. Funny, but obviously inappropriate.

It's a no go.

Author:  whattttttt [ Fri Mar 05, 2010 5:11 pm ]
Post subject: 

Quote:
It's possible that at least some out of the 7/10 were sarcastic "go for it's"

I'd say definitely no..

I mean I have hot relatives, and though I may be even attracted to them physically. It's not a good deal.

Watch the whole series of Arrested Development with Michael Cera. His character, and his cousin Maybe (thats her name), kind of have this comedic sexual tension, and it's weird. Funny, but obviously inappropriate.

It's a no go.

ohh i am well aware of maebe hahaha
i love that show! very well written. i especially like when he manages to tell his dad, and he just blows it off as a joke

btw the 'go for it's were more detailed than that, saying something about enough of a distance in the family tree etc, but that not my issue, its the aftermath that i'm unsure of. i dont know what im expecting from these replies, but something beyond yes or no is appreciated.

id like to mention that when i first met her, i did notice she was exceptionally hot, but i was nowhere near physically attracted to her, i guess its more like respecting her good looks. but not even for a second did anything like what i wrote above cross my mind. i would even have to say that if i stumbled onto a question like the one i wrote above, i would be one of the 'ew dont do it!'.. but now.. its different.

i guess it turned around when she started showing interest in me, and i got to know her better. i wish she was dumb and ugly so i wouldnt have to go through this.

Author:  Ezo [ Fri Mar 05, 2010 7:14 pm ]
Post subject: 

Arent there a lot of other girls around that are equally attractive and NOT your cousins?

Author:  whattttttt [ Sat Mar 06, 2010 1:08 pm ]
Post subject: 

Quote:
Arent there a lot of other girls around that are equally attractive and NOT your cousins?
"I've been running a lot of game (with other girls), working on my situational confidence and natural game, and opening a lot during the day when running errands or at school, not to mention clubbing, I found a local pua and we've been sarging weeknights. I've been having plenty of success, so this isn't some desperate need for a female touch."

Author:  Ezo [ Sat Mar 06, 2010 4:57 pm ]
Post subject: 

Exactly, so that means that you can actually forget about her and go for the next.

Author:  Fin [ Sat Mar 06, 2010 5:53 pm ]
Post subject: 

Where's Beschatten. :lol:

And no, this is a terrible idea, biologically you shouldn't be into her. So I reckon this has something to do with a lack of options.

Drop it, move on, and find relationship/sex with someone who won't cause in-breeding.

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