PUA Forum :: Really hard to read

Ok so,
im a musician and my producer brings a girl by the studio after we finish doing a few songs that night. he brought her over to meet me already told he about her personality and i develop a game plan. First Night everything goes great. she even called my friend that night to tell him how great of a guy i am and everything. the next night she came over to finish a movie we had started the night before and i think i made a mistake there. i tried to start kino almost as soon as we sat down. about five minutes into the movie i grabbed her hand and was holding her and and tickling throughout the movie. about 3/4s of the way into the movie i went in for a kiss but she said she doesnt kiss on the first date so i backed off and just kept flirting and playing with her. so i wasnt getting the vibe i was hoping for so i had my friend ask her how the date went and she responds that everything was great still thinks im a great guy but im a little too friendly. one thing i was warned about before i even attempted to pick her up was that she was extremely elusive. horrible at answering text msgs and phone calls, but i wasnt to worried about it. but now i think i screwed up that first night because she is really bad with the communication factor. i just feel like if i ran better game she would be dying to talk to me. is that the wrong way of thinking??? we did have a conversation about that. apparently she was really hurt by the last two guys shes dated so she says that she will push a guy away before she even gets a chance to like him.. should i worry about that?
thx 4 ur time and sry 4 the long winded question

Author:	Tcalv [ Tue Oct 13, 2009 2:57 pm ]
Post subject:	Really hard to read
Ok so, im a musician and my producer brings a girl by the studio after we finish doing a few songs that night. he brought her over to meet me already told he about her personality and i develop a game plan. First Night everything goes great. she even called my friend that night to tell him how great of a guy i am and everything. the next night she came over to finish a movie we had started the night before and i think i made a mistake there. i tried to start kino almost as soon as we sat down. about five minutes into the movie i grabbed her hand and was holding her and and tickling throughout the movie. about 3/4s of the way into the movie i went in for a kiss but she said she doesnt kiss on the first date so i backed off and just kept flirting and playing with her. so i wasnt getting the vibe i was hoping for so i had my friend ask her how the date went and she responds that everything was great still thinks im a great guy but im a little too friendly. one thing i was warned about before i even attempted to pick her up was that she was extremely elusive. horrible at answering text msgs and phone calls, but i wasnt to worried about it. but now i think i screwed up that first night because she is really bad with the communication factor. i just feel like if i ran better game she would be dying to talk to me. is that the wrong way of thinking??? we did have a conversation about that. apparently she was really hurt by the last two guys shes dated so she says that she will push a guy away before she even gets a chance to like him.. should i worry about that? thx 4 ur time and sry 4 the long winded question

Author:	TheJ [ Tue Oct 13, 2009 3:49 pm ]
Post subject:
What do you want with that girl? If you want to go for a LTR, respect her pas negative experience and take it slowly. That doesn't mean don't kino and all that. Do build attraction and tension. But don't push too far. That reminds me of a thing I read of David DeAngelo. Basically you'll want her to initiate the kissing. How to do this? Mess up with the traditional steps (hand, kiss, arousal, sex,...). Get her aroused. One way that works great (field tested) is to smell her. Let's say you are watching a movie. Lean in smell her and go 'you smell great' lean out. Wait a bit Touch teh tip of her hair, lean in smell more. Take your time. Lean out. Do this a couple of times. She can't object, you arn't doing anything physical really. She will get aroused, and will want to kiss you. Alright, good luck!

Author:	Saint1990 [ Tue Oct 13, 2009 4:04 pm ]
Post subject:
Sounds like a freeze out would have been in order with her after the "no kissing on the first date" bit. Many women have a high defence barrier after past relationships. I dunno what you realy want from her mate? Is it a relationship or a bit of a fling? Regards, Saint

Author:	Tcalv [ Tue Oct 13, 2009 4:07 pm ]
Post subject:
I pretty much stooped my fast advances cause i didn't want to completely blow myself out ill also try that routine u mentioned also... but any idea on what to do about her elusiveness? thx for your help also

Author:	keruli [ Tue Oct 13, 2009 4:09 pm ]
Post subject:
Try not worry ! In the bigger scheme of things its energy and time wasted.

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Author:	Tcalv [ Tue Oct 13, 2009 4:21 pm ]
Post subject:
If I had it my way it would be a LTR

Author:	Johnny B. [ Wed Oct 14, 2009 10:57 am ]
Post subject:	Re: Really hard to read
Quote: Ok so, im a musician and my producer brings a girl by the studio after we finish doing a few songs that night. he brought her over to meet me already told he about her personality and i develop a game plan. First Night everything goes great. she even called my friend that night to tell him how great of a guy i am and everything. the next night she came over to finish a movie we had started the night before and i think i made a mistake there. i tried to start kino almost as soon as we sat down. about five minutes into the movie i grabbed her hand and was holding her and and tickling throughout the movie. about 3/4s of the way into the movie i went in for a kiss but she said she doesnt kiss on the first date so i backed off and just kept flirting and playing with her. so i wasnt getting the vibe i was hoping for so i had my friend ask her how the date went and she responds that everything was great still thinks im a great guy but im a little too friendly. one thing i was warned about before i even attempted to pick her up was that she was extremely elusive. horrible at answering text msgs and phone calls, but i wasnt to worried about it. but now i think i screwed up that first night because she is really bad with the communication factor. i just feel like if i ran better game she would be dying to talk to me. is that the wrong way of thinking??? we did have a conversation about that. apparently she was really hurt by the last two guys shes dated so she says that she will push a guy away before she even gets a chance to like him.. should i worry about that? thx 4 ur time and sry 4 the long winded question I would look at this story of yours this way: 1. She said she was hurted by two of her last boyfriends (= she is elusive = she has developed a " shield " so her feelings wouldnt get hurt so easily again= you have to win her trust and built up comfort before you make radical kino ) 2. She said the first time that you were a really nice guy ( so she has interested you in some level but her safe mechanism is in your way ) 3. After you made some kino she told your friend that you are little too " friendly ". ( I think that the word " friendly " here means that you were too foward ) Help for you Kino: Its usually good that you try to make kino from the very soon you start talking to her but remember that your kino should be more " everyday kino " like a hand shake, high fives, brushing her sholder when you make a point, touching her arm with yours when standing next to her. You know, accidental kino, something that we are used to in everyday action. So i would suggest that you try to start her kino escalation from there, " everyday kino " and than moving to " overt " kino which includes holding her hand or arm in arm escorting. If you start touching her in too obvious way in the first time like you did than her safe mechanism may react to that. Remember allso that you may not want to touch her all the time, keep it short first! NOTE: - Try to make her earn your kino by rewarding her something she did that you liked I post you some Text/ phone game help later. [ Johnny B ]

Author:	Tcalv [ Sat Oct 17, 2009 1:23 am ]
Post subject:
yea thats the thing i got to remember, to let the escalation build instead of just jumping in for the kill. ill chalk it up as a newbie mistake forget it happened and keep plowing through. good news is in the last few days it seems that i made progress. she hasnt been as elusive at all and ive been able to get her to talk about more sensitive topics like her sexual experiences and previous partners and stuff... thanks for the comments guys they really helped

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