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how to deal with a rambler
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Author:  Bruce [ Sun Jun 14, 2009 9:18 am ]
Post subject:  how to deal with a rambler
This one girl rambles in her emails. I informed her as much rambling there is in your emails I still don't know exactly who you are. She didn't take this too kindly--I hit a nerve. The tone in her email response changed. "What else do you want to know?" "Better prompt me to what you want to hear?" Then she rambles on and on, obviously jabbing at me now, rubbing it in.

What do I make of her reaction? It's sort of weird/crazy. Should I even respond? This one might be too much bitch/crazy for me (or the worth/effort) though; and better to seek greener pasture elsewhere.
Author:  Pred [ Sun Jun 14, 2009 10:20 am ]
Post subject: 
Well - your 'Stop the rambling' lol like you said, hit a nerve. Instead of being a neg it was an insult - just my opinion in hindsight - you could have indirectly told her to cut it short lol.

Do you have her picture? If you do and she's a HB7+ then yeah! If you don't have her picture, I advise you to email her back once more - if it doesn't work, then forget it and move on.
:P To avoid the ramblings, I advise you to put in some indirect-ish questions like "Hmmm - my favourite place is bla bla - you have one?" Instead of "What's your favourite place."

Cheers Mate ;) Good Luck
Author:  Bruce [ Mon Jun 15, 2009 7:33 am ]
Post subject: 
I think the rambling is a shield, so that I can't get to know her, and then I find myself in the this is not going anywhere zone (and she tells herself he was just not the right one). Thus, I got annoyed and told her.

I don't know if she's a HB7+, she sent me a pic but she was looking down and I couldn't exactly see her face. I asked if she got another one, but she says she doesn't want to show her face to a stranger on the internet, fair enough.

If she's not a HB, she might be socially inept, just my guess. Thus, the ramblings, to avoid getting hurt herself.

On the upside, I got an email from another girl, whom I've forgotten about--I emailed her about a month ago. Even though she too rambled, right off the bat she also said she apologized for rambling but that's who she is. And to be patient if I don't hear from her in a while (she works on a cruise line).

I'm not (yet) into this other girl or anything, but I was just struck by the difference in communication styles. I was like, oh here we go again, blah, blah, blah, but then she showed a different side, she knew how to relate (and communicate that), given her rambling and taking a while to respond. I was bit impressed.
Author:  Billionaire [ Mon Jun 15, 2009 8:55 am ]
Post subject: 
I've really only met two ramblers in my life but they both sucked.
Eventually they will annoy the shit out of you.
One of them was a guy and he's a retard. Seriously, he's an idiot.
The other one was a chick who just often talked too damn much and wouldn't let others talk.

Yeah Brian Tracy said that in a conversation between two compatible people, they both will be satisfied with how much the other person talks and the conversation will be easy.

So if you don't like how she talks, it probably won't work out.
Maybe you will want to hump and dump her.
Author:  kcdclan [ Mon Jun 15, 2009 12:13 pm ]
Post subject: 
get rid of her...if you dont want to hear her ramble then say bye...
Author:  Bruce [ Mon Oct 12, 2009 6:27 am ]
Post subject:  she emails me?
So I didn't respond back ... cause I thought she was a jerk in her reaction, though I did unintentionally insult her about her rambling.

5 months later she emails me out of the blue being all nice and stuff.

What do I make of this? I kind of thought I wouldn't hear from her again. Is she lonely? Did karma bite her in the ass? By the way, she's turning 31, if that has any significance. Makes me wonder why the sudden thaw or change in behavior, or is it all a facade?

Not sure I will respond, but if I do should I rehash the rambling issue? Apologize for insulting her? Let her know she was jerk? Or, pretend like nothing ever happened, like I think she's doing, is that good or bad?
Author:  TrueFlame [ Mon Oct 12, 2009 2:10 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: she emails me?
Quote:
So I didn't respond back ... cause I thought she was a jerk in her reaction, though I did unintentionally insult her about her rambling.

5 months later she emails me out of the blue being all nice and stuff.

What do I make of this? I kind of thought I wouldn't hear from her again. Is she lonely? Did karma bite her in the ass? By the way, she's turning 31, if that has any significance. Makes me wonder why the sudden thaw or change in behavior, or is it all a facade?

Not sure I will respond, but if I do should I rehash the rambling issue? Apologize for insulting her? Let her know she was jerk? Or, pretend like nothing ever happened, like I think she's doing, is that good or bad?
I'm surprised you even need to ask this. Never apologize, never explain. It is no big deal.
You handled the situation correctly in the first place. You now have the upper hand.

There is no need to put up with her bullshit, and if you do you'll reduce your chances of getting laid anyway. I used to do this in my AFC days and it invariably led to her going off with someone more dominant, whilst I got dumped in the friendzone.
Author:  Bruce [ Wed Oct 14, 2009 3:45 am ]
Post subject: 
Thanks for the word of confidence!

The AFC in me wants to react, interact, analyze, respond, but the PUA in me says FU girl, you responded to me like a jerk, when all I wanted was to get to know you. Now 5 months later you're going to email me being all nice and shit? I don't think so. I'm not here to make you happy or be your stepping-stone towards your happiness.

It also doesn't hurt that another girl has my fancy. She treats me real nice and sweet--and it makes me feel good. I just have to keep thinking that there are plenty of girls out there like her and I don't have to put up with the BS ones.
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